Now why did you have to go and do that??
My brother called this morning. Of course, i was sleeping, but i told him i was reading, which i do often enough, now that i have the time. Oh, school's out, by the way. I was too excited moving out to share my absolute euphoria with you. It's been quite awhile since then, sitting around and lazing about, enjoying the fruits of getting outta school a goodly while before the high school kiddies do. Of course, the price for that is paying for school and much harder courses. Those bastard prosti-tots got it easy.
I digress. My brother called. He wanted me to edit something for him, which is common enough, he's never had the skills to properly edit something himself, a fact i used to exploit often, but now i just give up and do it, because the truth is he'll never learn. I've managed to land myself a potential job at a restaurant called North China Buffet, in Ajax. I went there because my friend Sean said they hired just about anybody, and because the money was a dollar above minimum wage, which should be around $8, not too bad, right? Considering my last legitimate job was at $6 for the duration of the training session. And that job wasn't even legitimate, but let's not get into that. Anyway, he asked me why I applied for that job, and basically why i wanted to do something like taking away dirty plates from people. I don't think i gave him an answer, and then he asked me if i had checked the link he sent me (he sent me a student workopolis.com link to his account), and i admitted that i had checked it once, but that i hadn't really looked for anything beyond signing in. Then the worst part came. He asked me if anyone else i knew worked at the buffet place. I said Sean did, and my brother said that he figured as much, and that i hadn't changed one bit. Then he said that he didn't want me to end up like he did, and that my job wouldn't have any significance on my resume at all, that it's nothing to put something like that on a resume.
That disturbed me quite a bit. Who is he to know for certain that this job won't have any bearing at all in any future resume that i hand in? is it possible that he can manipulate the strings of time and see into my fate, as i job hunt hopelessly? Will no one take me because they will overlook my experience in the restaurant industry? Will i turn out to be exactly like he is now, stuck in a dead-end job while desperately looking for a way out, seeking jobs that aren't even in his core area of expertise because he needs out? If he can see all of that in a single flash of my telling him a friend of mine works in the same place, then i will commend him in the future and admit my mistake to him then. But for now, let's just assume that he has no right to tell me anything at all, shall we? I think the thing that angered me the most was the fact that he told me i hadn't changed. was he right? my last job was the same as well, a friend's recommendation. that may have been slightly different though, because i was given the job almost immediately, simply due to my friend's recommendation. Is this any different? A friend who works in the same place, but this time with a relatively easygoing employer with a substandard understanding of the english language, who practically hands me a job after filling out an application without a SIN number or a reference. Similarities?
I like to think that i have changed, even in the slightest way. i also like to think that a few small words aren't enough to shake me to the core, but isn't that what i'm bitching about right now? the fact that i'm still relying on easy streak to get me where i need to be? i have several resumes in my clipboard, ready to hand out. i looked for job openings on monster.ca, and i think i found like 3 of them that were suitable, and yet i didn't apply for them because i didn't think the position would still be open. Actually, i even applied for a relatively easy-looking job at Vector Marketing, and on their on-line application i told them i could start working immediately. They called me the next morning, and they said i had to travel to Whitby, which scared me enough into telling them i had to cancel. I think Kristen may be right though, that it's door-to-door. but am i the same as i was before? i like to think that i gave some sort of effort, and that i honestly tried to get that preferred job sitting behind a desk, but that i have had to accept that i couldn't find it, and am forced to concede with something easier, and with a friendlier atmosphere to boot. I also like to think that my past work places have been fortunate stepping stones to the place i have reached now, places i can be thankful for because i paused and took the time to reach out towards success.
I don't know. i think the point i'm trying to find is whether there's been any self-improvement at all over the years, or whether i'm sitting in the same place as before, only slightly wiser about the horrors of the real world. Is my brother right? or could he just be haunted by the fact that he came out of school at the wrong time and there are fewer jobs for him to land? that he just lost his own confidence in just about everything and now has to instill that same dreadful feeling upon other people? maybe he really can see what's happening. i like to think that the path i'm forging right now will lead me someplace where i can settle down and be happy. Someplace i can find my true self-worth and self-fulfillment, after my fair share of effort and hard work. I also like to think that my past experiences in the job market help me somewhat, in that they tell my employers that i'm just a simple guy who has been trying to find his way in the world, and that wherever he lands, it doesn't matter that his past experiences fit your expectations entirely, but that he's just like everyone else, with the same desire and determination to work hard and achieve his goals.
You know, i think i may still be mad at myself for letting a couple sentences rile me so much. Maybe this will help.
I digress. My brother called. He wanted me to edit something for him, which is common enough, he's never had the skills to properly edit something himself, a fact i used to exploit often, but now i just give up and do it, because the truth is he'll never learn. I've managed to land myself a potential job at a restaurant called North China Buffet, in Ajax. I went there because my friend Sean said they hired just about anybody, and because the money was a dollar above minimum wage, which should be around $8, not too bad, right? Considering my last legitimate job was at $6 for the duration of the training session. And that job wasn't even legitimate, but let's not get into that. Anyway, he asked me why I applied for that job, and basically why i wanted to do something like taking away dirty plates from people. I don't think i gave him an answer, and then he asked me if i had checked the link he sent me (he sent me a student workopolis.com link to his account), and i admitted that i had checked it once, but that i hadn't really looked for anything beyond signing in. Then the worst part came. He asked me if anyone else i knew worked at the buffet place. I said Sean did, and my brother said that he figured as much, and that i hadn't changed one bit. Then he said that he didn't want me to end up like he did, and that my job wouldn't have any significance on my resume at all, that it's nothing to put something like that on a resume.
That disturbed me quite a bit. Who is he to know for certain that this job won't have any bearing at all in any future resume that i hand in? is it possible that he can manipulate the strings of time and see into my fate, as i job hunt hopelessly? Will no one take me because they will overlook my experience in the restaurant industry? Will i turn out to be exactly like he is now, stuck in a dead-end job while desperately looking for a way out, seeking jobs that aren't even in his core area of expertise because he needs out? If he can see all of that in a single flash of my telling him a friend of mine works in the same place, then i will commend him in the future and admit my mistake to him then. But for now, let's just assume that he has no right to tell me anything at all, shall we? I think the thing that angered me the most was the fact that he told me i hadn't changed. was he right? my last job was the same as well, a friend's recommendation. that may have been slightly different though, because i was given the job almost immediately, simply due to my friend's recommendation. Is this any different? A friend who works in the same place, but this time with a relatively easygoing employer with a substandard understanding of the english language, who practically hands me a job after filling out an application without a SIN number or a reference. Similarities?
I like to think that i have changed, even in the slightest way. i also like to think that a few small words aren't enough to shake me to the core, but isn't that what i'm bitching about right now? the fact that i'm still relying on easy streak to get me where i need to be? i have several resumes in my clipboard, ready to hand out. i looked for job openings on monster.ca, and i think i found like 3 of them that were suitable, and yet i didn't apply for them because i didn't think the position would still be open. Actually, i even applied for a relatively easy-looking job at Vector Marketing, and on their on-line application i told them i could start working immediately. They called me the next morning, and they said i had to travel to Whitby, which scared me enough into telling them i had to cancel. I think Kristen may be right though, that it's door-to-door. but am i the same as i was before? i like to think that i gave some sort of effort, and that i honestly tried to get that preferred job sitting behind a desk, but that i have had to accept that i couldn't find it, and am forced to concede with something easier, and with a friendlier atmosphere to boot. I also like to think that my past work places have been fortunate stepping stones to the place i have reached now, places i can be thankful for because i paused and took the time to reach out towards success.
I don't know. i think the point i'm trying to find is whether there's been any self-improvement at all over the years, or whether i'm sitting in the same place as before, only slightly wiser about the horrors of the real world. Is my brother right? or could he just be haunted by the fact that he came out of school at the wrong time and there are fewer jobs for him to land? that he just lost his own confidence in just about everything and now has to instill that same dreadful feeling upon other people? maybe he really can see what's happening. i like to think that the path i'm forging right now will lead me someplace where i can settle down and be happy. Someplace i can find my true self-worth and self-fulfillment, after my fair share of effort and hard work. I also like to think that my past experiences in the job market help me somewhat, in that they tell my employers that i'm just a simple guy who has been trying to find his way in the world, and that wherever he lands, it doesn't matter that his past experiences fit your expectations entirely, but that he's just like everyone else, with the same desire and determination to work hard and achieve his goals.
You know, i think i may still be mad at myself for letting a couple sentences rile me so much. Maybe this will help.