a short dissertation on cartoons and nintendo, and great quotes
Wow, I’ve just been realizing some possible social implications from the game Donkey Kong (the original). Let’s see, enlist an Italian to endanger his life to defeat a big monkey on top of a construction site so the pretty white princess might be rescued? This sounds like it could be a might prejudiced against Italians and blacks. Now I say this half-jokingly from a moment of entirely bored pondering, but when you think about it, it works. And don’t get me started on the Mario games themselves, they’re just nuts, the poster-game for acid. Don’t get me wrong either, Mario is one of my most-loved game characters. The craziness is fabulous.
Those of you who’ve known me for a while know I do this a lot. For instance, I still think Shaggy and Scooby were just really stoned all the time, I think that Wally Gator and snagglepuss were homosexual partners, and, speaking of which, he-man was also a homosexual (or at least the prince was).
The world of Mario is also very reminiscent of pre-civil war America. Think about it, they just pluck hapless mushroom people (e.g. toad) from their peaceful, native area to endanger their lives of being kidnapped by a gigantic demonic dino-turtle and placed in subsequent trap-filled castles to distract everyone’s favorite Italian plumber.
They also place their yoke of tyranny around the necks of yoshis of all colors, only to make them ingest unsafe, untested food product while it’s still alive. And when it suits them to jump to a higher cliff by jumping off the yoshi in midair, allowing the yoshi to fall to its doom down a chasm of 16-bit terror, they do it. “Oh, I’ll just go get another one out of the next question mark block.” Oh sure guys. It’s just that simple, is it? Nevermind the lives of the countless yoshis you’ve left in your wake of mushroom-popping, flower picking, star touching ignorance (remember now, I’m on a tyrade, but I’m joking folks).
Don’t get me started on kirby, he doesn’t even exist, and he’s an unsafe food sucking madpuff. And I find it no coincidence that the lil orange evil mushrooms with feet are called “goombas.” That’s a racial slur very deliberately being put into the minds of our youth.
lol This just goes to show you how you can find hidden meanings in anything if you want to, even if they’re not really there.
And now…quotes from one of my favorite movies :
“I don't need a limousine to know who I am. At least I admit that I don't know. I know that things are fucked up, beyond belief, and I have nothing original to say about it...” - Jeff, “SubUrbia”
“Let us not forget what Chernowsky said, ‘the greatest men are the most alone.’” - Tim, “SubUrbia”
“Idealism is guilty middle-class bullshit.” - Jeff, “SubUrbia”
Jeff: Burger Manifesto Part One is gonna make people think?
Sooze: Yes, you asshole!
Jeff: About what?
Sooze: About things that are important to me!
Jeff: Like what?
Sooze: Sexual politics, racism, the environment, the military...
Jeff: Racism? You don't even know anyone that's black!
Sooze: Yes I do!!!
Jeff: Name one.
Sooze: Oh…. *grrah*…Karen Johnson!
Jeff: (holding up finger and laughing) ONE!!!
Jeff: ...and there'll be all these generations of suckers, all trying to figure out what the fuck they're doing on this fucking planet and it'll all be full of shit. It's all so fucking futile.
Tim: If it's all so fucking futile, what the fuck are you so fucking upset about, fuckhead?
Bee-Bee: Didn't you see their video on MTV?
Tim: No, I shot my TV.
Sooz: Jeff likes to argue for the sake of arguing.
Jeff: No I don't.
Sooz: Yes you do.
Jeff: No I don't!
Sooz: ...Yes you do.
Jeff: No I - !
Sooz: JEFF!
Those of you who’ve known me for a while know I do this a lot. For instance, I still think Shaggy and Scooby were just really stoned all the time, I think that Wally Gator and snagglepuss were homosexual partners, and, speaking of which, he-man was also a homosexual (or at least the prince was).
The world of Mario is also very reminiscent of pre-civil war America. Think about it, they just pluck hapless mushroom people (e.g. toad) from their peaceful, native area to endanger their lives of being kidnapped by a gigantic demonic dino-turtle and placed in subsequent trap-filled castles to distract everyone’s favorite Italian plumber.
They also place their yoke of tyranny around the necks of yoshis of all colors, only to make them ingest unsafe, untested food product while it’s still alive. And when it suits them to jump to a higher cliff by jumping off the yoshi in midair, allowing the yoshi to fall to its doom down a chasm of 16-bit terror, they do it. “Oh, I’ll just go get another one out of the next question mark block.” Oh sure guys. It’s just that simple, is it? Nevermind the lives of the countless yoshis you’ve left in your wake of mushroom-popping, flower picking, star touching ignorance (remember now, I’m on a tyrade, but I’m joking folks).
Don’t get me started on kirby, he doesn’t even exist, and he’s an unsafe food sucking madpuff. And I find it no coincidence that the lil orange evil mushrooms with feet are called “goombas.” That’s a racial slur very deliberately being put into the minds of our youth.
lol This just goes to show you how you can find hidden meanings in anything if you want to, even if they’re not really there.
And now…quotes from one of my favorite movies :
“I don't need a limousine to know who I am. At least I admit that I don't know. I know that things are fucked up, beyond belief, and I have nothing original to say about it...” - Jeff, “SubUrbia”
“Let us not forget what Chernowsky said, ‘the greatest men are the most alone.’” - Tim, “SubUrbia”
“Idealism is guilty middle-class bullshit.” - Jeff, “SubUrbia”
Jeff: Burger Manifesto Part One is gonna make people think?
Sooze: Yes, you asshole!
Jeff: About what?
Sooze: About things that are important to me!
Jeff: Like what?
Sooze: Sexual politics, racism, the environment, the military...
Jeff: Racism? You don't even know anyone that's black!
Sooze: Yes I do!!!
Jeff: Name one.
Sooze: Oh…. *grrah*…Karen Johnson!
Jeff: (holding up finger and laughing) ONE!!!
Jeff: ...and there'll be all these generations of suckers, all trying to figure out what the fuck they're doing on this fucking planet and it'll all be full of shit. It's all so fucking futile.
Tim: If it's all so fucking futile, what the fuck are you so fucking upset about, fuckhead?
Bee-Bee: Didn't you see their video on MTV?
Tim: No, I shot my TV.
Sooz: Jeff likes to argue for the sake of arguing.
Jeff: No I don't.
Sooz: Yes you do.
Jeff: No I don't!
Sooz: ...Yes you do.
Jeff: No I - !
Sooz: JEFF!