[post # somethingorother]
Getting kicked out of where I'm living. Have to find a place soon. Have to get rid of dog. Hating my job and feeling like no matter how hard I try, I fail at it. Now I can't leave it until who-knows-when. Have been consistently awake starting 12:00pm - 7:00 am, which is fucking with my head. That, or Silent Hill Homecoming. Or both.
I'm angry because after finally working and earning all this great stuff and a comfortable - and ACTUALLY SAFE - lifestyle, I'm getting shoved out of it.
Part of me wants to be bitter and cry and give up. But another part - a part that's grown a lot bigger this year - has decided I'll just have to do whatever I have to do to get myself back into this nice life I had for at least a few weeks. I can do that. I did it before.
I just can't tell which of those two parts is more logical, but I'm getting sick of only listening to the logic-based part of my mind because all it does is make me fucking miserable and I'm never going back to being like that again.
I'm going to find a place, find someone to stay with, keep at this job, do better, nail down what I need to do to put together a decent portfolio, and apply to game studios in the city. I can do this.
I'm angry because after finally working and earning all this great stuff and a comfortable - and ACTUALLY SAFE - lifestyle, I'm getting shoved out of it.
Part of me wants to be bitter and cry and give up. But another part - a part that's grown a lot bigger this year - has decided I'll just have to do whatever I have to do to get myself back into this nice life I had for at least a few weeks. I can do that. I did it before.
I just can't tell which of those two parts is more logical, but I'm getting sick of only listening to the logic-based part of my mind because all it does is make me fucking miserable and I'm never going back to being like that again.
I'm going to find a place, find someone to stay with, keep at this job, do better, nail down what I need to do to put together a decent portfolio, and apply to game studios in the city. I can do this.