Sayonara, Ringtones!
Once upon a time, I was riding in the car listening to blink-182's "dude ranch" album. "voyeur" finishes playing and "dammit" begins. I immediately think of Mehul. That's when it hit me. I'm obsessed with Mehul. I hate ringtones. It's not that I have a problem thinking of friends when I hear a song that's been assigned to their ringtone. It's more that I don't like manipulating my own mind by forming cognitive associations that are unnatural. It's one thing for me to happen to have listened to a lot of my Alanis Morissette cassette while playing Wave Race 64 and occasionally getting flashbacks of the game when I hear certain songs on "Jagged Little Pill." It's another for me to have said, "You know what? I want to think of Wave Race 64 when I listen to this album." And with ringtones, this is what I've done. I've said, "I want to associate this person with this song." And after hearing the same clip over and over, you will burn that association in your brain.
When I came to this conclusion, I realized there are different ways of handling it. One way would be to periodically rotate my ringtones out so that no specific song sticks long enough to stay in my head. Unfortunately, I realized that this would probably just expedite and exacerbate the problem I am be trying to prevent. Or I could have no specific ringtones for callers and have just a generic ring. However, I like knowing who is calling without looking at my phone. So that option was out. So I figured out a way to give each person an individual ring without adding unnecessary, false associations.
I realized that I could replace everyone's ringtone with a generic human-ish computer voice reading out the person's name and instructing me to answer the phone. So I went online to AT&T's Text-to-Speech Demo and recorded " is calling. Please answer the phone," for the people who call me most frequently then converted the recordings into mp3's and put them on my phone. There are variations. For instance, Jake's is in Spanish with a Spanish speaker, Andrew's is a British speaker, and Alan's uses his nickname (A-dog, and yes, I made it up). However, I realized before doing this that it would eventually annoy me. There is also an unwanted side effect. Everyone knows who is calling you. Even if they don't know who the person is, with a spoken voice, it's pretty damned obvious. So what was a Chad to do?
My solution is, I believe, a very good one. I want to hear you when you call. Yes, I want to hear a recorded message from the caller as a ring. This will allow the caller to express some creativity in the message so I won't be hearing the same thing from everyone, and what's better to associate with a person than his or her actual voice?
To execute my plan, I need your cooperation. I would like you to record a message that you want me to hear when you call me. It can be of any length, preferably not over about 20 seconds though since I won't hear it all when you actually call. There are two methods of doing this. If you have a laptop with a built-in microphone or a computer microphone, you can open up Sound Recorder
(location: Start -> All Programs -> Accessories -> Entertainment -> Sound Recorder), record a clip of yourself, add it to your iTunes library, right-click on it and click "Convert selection to..." (it doesn't matter which type you use, my phone can handle AAC and MP3), then send that file to my gmail address (my LJ screenname @gmail.com). This is the do-it-yourself method.
The other method is far easier. See me in person, I'll hand you my phone, and you can record whatever right there. I do request that you not send me or record anything vulgar that I can't use. I'm serious about this. As long as it's not something annoying or a song (unless you're singing it, in which case that's just funny), I will set what you send me as your ringer. And feel free to pass this entry on to friends of mine who don't use LJ and/or don't know I have one, cause I'm already starting to get sick of these computer people. And Kim's suggestion of "The coolest person ever is calling," in a computer voice isn't going to happen. But if she wishes to actually record it, I will indeed set it as her ringtone. And I appreciate her pointing out to me that I hadn't mentioned her ringtone suggestion.
When I came to this conclusion, I realized there are different ways of handling it. One way would be to periodically rotate my ringtones out so that no specific song sticks long enough to stay in my head. Unfortunately, I realized that this would probably just expedite and exacerbate the problem I am be trying to prevent. Or I could have no specific ringtones for callers and have just a generic ring. However, I like knowing who is calling without looking at my phone. So that option was out. So I figured out a way to give each person an individual ring without adding unnecessary, false associations.
I realized that I could replace everyone's ringtone with a generic human-ish computer voice reading out the person's name and instructing me to answer the phone. So I went online to AT&T's Text-to-Speech Demo and recorded " is calling. Please answer the phone," for the people who call me most frequently then converted the recordings into mp3's and put them on my phone. There are variations. For instance, Jake's is in Spanish with a Spanish speaker, Andrew's is a British speaker, and Alan's uses his nickname (A-dog, and yes, I made it up). However, I realized before doing this that it would eventually annoy me. There is also an unwanted side effect. Everyone knows who is calling you. Even if they don't know who the person is, with a spoken voice, it's pretty damned obvious. So what was a Chad to do?
My solution is, I believe, a very good one. I want to hear you when you call. Yes, I want to hear a recorded message from the caller as a ring. This will allow the caller to express some creativity in the message so I won't be hearing the same thing from everyone, and what's better to associate with a person than his or her actual voice?
To execute my plan, I need your cooperation. I would like you to record a message that you want me to hear when you call me. It can be of any length, preferably not over about 20 seconds though since I won't hear it all when you actually call. There are two methods of doing this. If you have a laptop with a built-in microphone or a computer microphone, you can open up Sound Recorder
(location: Start -> All Programs -> Accessories -> Entertainment -> Sound Recorder), record a clip of yourself, add it to your iTunes library, right-click on it and click "Convert selection to..." (it doesn't matter which type you use, my phone can handle AAC and MP3), then send that file to my gmail address (my LJ screenname @gmail.com). This is the do-it-yourself method.
The other method is far easier. See me in person, I'll hand you my phone, and you can record whatever right there. I do request that you not send me or record anything vulgar that I can't use. I'm serious about this. As long as it's not something annoying or a song (unless you're singing it, in which case that's just funny), I will set what you send me as your ringer. And feel free to pass this entry on to friends of mine who don't use LJ and/or don't know I have one, cause I'm already starting to get sick of these computer people. And Kim's suggestion of "The coolest person ever is calling," in a computer voice isn't going to happen. But if she wishes to actually record it, I will indeed set it as her ringtone. And I appreciate her pointing out to me that I hadn't mentioned her ringtone suggestion.