a little out of sorts...
today began good,had a very spiritual morning cleansing my room and my altar, felt great, inspirational music and a little time to myself did me the world of good. It was a long overdue overhaul of my space. It will also help to keep them pesky spirits at bay! Now i feel all anxious n wound up, am really stressing about this operation tomorrow and i dont even know how i'm getting home grrr. i really cant aford to be shelling out £13 on a taxi back to guisborough and is it really advisable to be gettin the bus home after an operation? hmmm.
tomorrow is going to be very traumatic for me, it is not going to be easy being awake. i cant even get an injection without wanting to vomit and pass out through sheer terror and i have to sit there whilst they cut my wrist open!!! i know i wont be able to feel it and what not but i will know its happening. argh!
saw my new neice yesterday, Kaitlyn. She is so beautiful, it has been a painful reminder though of my problems and i have so far managed to hold back the tears until they have left.
Had my friend from uni on the phone last night too, lisa. She was very upset, first time we have spoken for a long time, it was awful hearing her crying and not being there to give her a hug. she is a strong person tho and we are going to get together soon and go chase some ghosts and bury some hatchets up in newcastle. i think its what she needs, she needs to rediscover the old her because she isnt liking the person she is turning into.
Peter is off having dinner with his mam, aunty and cousin and i'm bored. was going to finish the wig i am working on but i dont have a suitable colour to do the finishing touches to the bangs grrrr.
anyways..off to the world of ebay i go
xxx
tomorrow is going to be very traumatic for me, it is not going to be easy being awake. i cant even get an injection without wanting to vomit and pass out through sheer terror and i have to sit there whilst they cut my wrist open!!! i know i wont be able to feel it and what not but i will know its happening. argh!
saw my new neice yesterday, Kaitlyn. She is so beautiful, it has been a painful reminder though of my problems and i have so far managed to hold back the tears until they have left.
Had my friend from uni on the phone last night too, lisa. She was very upset, first time we have spoken for a long time, it was awful hearing her crying and not being there to give her a hug. she is a strong person tho and we are going to get together soon and go chase some ghosts and bury some hatchets up in newcastle. i think its what she needs, she needs to rediscover the old her because she isnt liking the person she is turning into.
Peter is off having dinner with his mam, aunty and cousin and i'm bored. was going to finish the wig i am working on but i dont have a suitable colour to do the finishing touches to the bangs grrrr.
anyways..off to the world of ebay i go
xxx