Cracking underneath the pressure
It's a bizarre feeling, this is the one time I'm actually experiencing insomnia. It's kind of bizarre for me because there appears to be absolutely no reason for me to do this and funnily enough despite taking a lot of pills to prevent this every night, I'm still up with little interest in sleeping, it's been a while.
I couldn't have picked a worse night since I do have an important test today and possibly two or another one next week, so there's a fair bit of pressure at school atm, although this is to be expected as I'm nearing the end of the term anyways.
I think I'm really starting to have it with my current agency (HR), for simply not having any sort of jobs at all, I think it's absurd you can claim to be one of the top hospitality recruiters and claim there's barely any work in the hospitality industry atm *head palms*. Overall I must say most a decent chunk of my experiences have been fairly decent but there have been some annoying and bizarre moments that certainly have gotten to me. The worst place required me to remember the location of 100 different rooms of by heart upon arrival, getting told off for helping out, getting told off for not doing anything despite not being told to do anything, having people claim I'm not their responsibility and constantly asking me to go help somebody else oh and of course being told off for washing the dishes was one of my favourites considering that was my job in the description. I worked in a bar on the weekend and have been told this week I'm not allowed to work in a bar because I'm not qualified. This company is really simply starting to mess with my head heavily.....
In short, I'm doing the same work my mother lives off, seems similar but less likely to fuck me around, so this in theory should work a lot better.
Confidence levels are lowering a lot in my life, I remember being overjoyed when I started studying that this was going to be a breeze but life is becoming a stressful thing to manage, money is scarce, my social life is virtually non-existant and that's not even by choice. There's not really a lot to show for all my efforts studying and there's unlikely to be until around 5 years or so from now once this course hits near the end.
Even if I'm stuck out doofing for it, I'm looking forward to me and Amanda's one year anniversary, she's seriously becoming one of the only things at the moment I really am living for.....
I couldn't have picked a worse night since I do have an important test today and possibly two or another one next week, so there's a fair bit of pressure at school atm, although this is to be expected as I'm nearing the end of the term anyways.
I think I'm really starting to have it with my current agency (HR), for simply not having any sort of jobs at all, I think it's absurd you can claim to be one of the top hospitality recruiters and claim there's barely any work in the hospitality industry atm *head palms*. Overall I must say most a decent chunk of my experiences have been fairly decent but there have been some annoying and bizarre moments that certainly have gotten to me. The worst place required me to remember the location of 100 different rooms of by heart upon arrival, getting told off for helping out, getting told off for not doing anything despite not being told to do anything, having people claim I'm not their responsibility and constantly asking me to go help somebody else oh and of course being told off for washing the dishes was one of my favourites considering that was my job in the description. I worked in a bar on the weekend and have been told this week I'm not allowed to work in a bar because I'm not qualified. This company is really simply starting to mess with my head heavily.....
In short, I'm doing the same work my mother lives off, seems similar but less likely to fuck me around, so this in theory should work a lot better.
Confidence levels are lowering a lot in my life, I remember being overjoyed when I started studying that this was going to be a breeze but life is becoming a stressful thing to manage, money is scarce, my social life is virtually non-existant and that's not even by choice. There's not really a lot to show for all my efforts studying and there's unlikely to be until around 5 years or so from now once this course hits near the end.
Even if I'm stuck out doofing for it, I'm looking forward to me and Amanda's one year anniversary, she's seriously becoming one of the only things at the moment I really am living for.....