i think im going crazy
i think i've come to a very pivitol conclusion about myself. actually, im still pretty frickin confused...but i have an idea. i now know that it's not the people i hang out with who are wrong, or bad. but it seems that the same thing happens no matter how good and godly or bad and worldly my friends are. i always end up pouring so much of myself into the friendships and doing everything possible to make the other person(s) happy, that i deny my own feelings so much and in the end, i feel hurt and used and bitter. it's got to be me!!! history repeats itself. could it be that i feel the need so much to be accepted that i go to such great lengths to make people like me? does it all go back to my lower than average self-esteem? i dont know... but whatever the reason is, i dont like it. i hate this.
cw
cw