Thats All Folks

[cuttiemcpretty]

Ben and I broke up. How many more times am I going to do this?!? Relationships are hard. Every boyfriend I have says what a wonderful girlfriend I am, that there aren't any other girls like me, yadah yadah yadah but if you look down at my hand I still don't have a ring (not that I was ready to marry). To be fair to Ben he was very good to me. Loves me, said he would marry me. He made a lot of sacrifices other boys wouldn't have made. Problem is that I want babies and he doesn't really think that fondly of them (not that Im ready for babies). We tried to find a middle. I'll do this if you do that etc etc but shakes head** there isn't a middle when 1 person ultimately wants children and the other thinks of them as a disease. My mother tells me it is a mistake to let him go. That he loves me and supports me the way a man should. That eventually he would have wanted children or that I could have "tricked" him into having children and that he would go nuts and be all about them. LOL! Couldn't believe my mother. Then I said, "But what if he's miserable?!?". Her answer very simply was "SO!" That she would help support me and that I live with them anyways. Somehow I don't think Ben would appreciate that. He doesn't deserve it either.

But Im going to miss him. I constantly want to text him and see how he's doing and ask him if he thinks we made the right decision. Just thinking of all the adventures Im going to miss and all the people I won't meet makes me so sad But shakes head** No. He will find happiness in whatever he chooses to do and with whomever he chooses to make a life with. He will be successful and do beautiful things but those things won't include the white picket fence or the labrador I'm looking for. Boo.

It was good times. It was totally worth it.