Fic: Things That Go Bump

May 11, 2009 16:33

Title: Things That Go Bump
Fandom: Harry Potter
Character: Frank Longbottom
Word Count: 350
Rating: PG
Note: This is for Sarah, and it is so very obviously her Frank haha. She wanted a Frank story with sausages, so here it be! Love you loads, babes. ♥

Late at night, in the deepest, darkest, smelliest, most hidden depths of Frank Longbottom's stomach, there lurked an angry, demanding, ridiculously hungry monster.

Rwoaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrghhhhhhhh

Frank awoke suddenly, a terrible fright having overcome him! The most terrible, horrifying growl had just reverberated through his room, waking him from his pleasant dreams of blonde hair and soft skin and... freckles.

"What the fuck?!" Frank bolted upright and checked his bed for damages before sighing in relief. He was so going to lecture one Barty Crouch Jr on invading his dreams next time he saw him. Because that seemed like the most rational thing to do, naturally.

Roarggggggggggwooooooooar

Frank grabbed his wand and looked around, wide eyed, for what surely must have been a most terrifying monster.

Hey, nobody said the Gryffindors had to be brave all the time. Especially when nobody was awake to see their moments of terror. Pfft.

"Come out now!" Frank demanded in the manliest voice he could muster. Well, that was what he intended, anyway, all that came out was a faint squeak.

Roarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrhhhhnnnnnnnngh

"Seriously, go away!" Frank got a few sleepy shushes from his dorm mates, who were no doubt unaware of the terrible beast that lurked within the dorm. Had Frank been more awake, he may have woken them and warned them of the danger, or possibly realised there was no danger to begin with, but instead he ran out of the dorms.

Out of the common room.

Out of Gryffindor Tower.

And into the kitchens!

Hey, everyone has their safeysafe places, and Frank had his. Don't judge.

Roaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawrgggggggghhhhhhhhh!

"Damnit!" Frank had thought he was clear of the beast, but it appeared to have followed him! He looked all around, but he saw nothing but the typical kitchen-type things. Very curious.

"Is Master Longbottom hungry?" one of the house elves inquired, holding out a small plate of sausages to the near delirious boy.

"No, I've got to..." Frank trailed off as he took sight of those delectable, delicious looking sausages, and he changed his mind, nodding enthusiastically.

The terrible monster could be slain later, of course.

sarah, harry potter, request, fic, writing

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