The MySpace Quiz 2021
1. In one sentence, explain what ended your last relationship.
You know how in the future everything is going to be explained through the nuances of being able to telepathicly explain exactly what you mean and are thinking without the limitations and missteps often associated with anxiety and the English language? That is going to probably help me out tremendously.
But that last real relationship that ended with definitive bookends and private settings to, ironically enough, a google document that functioned as a sort of livejournal of our whole romantic narrative, was one that was an impossible dream. I would quote myself here from that document if I could still see it but it was to the effect of the whole thing ending in a sad death, a naked lunch scenario in which we were finally honest about the implications of what moving forward would actually do and mean without every really saying it. The loss and punishment for making one of the most responsible and adult decisions of my life. The details, which this is lacking, just make it more of a bummer so I'll spare you, but suffice to say some tropes about love are real, even if we wished they were confined to dramatic plots of films or poetry.
2. What made you smile today?
Thinking about JP being the reluctant Peter Pan leader for a group of Fortniting Lost Boys.
3. What were you doing this morning at 8a.m.?
I was revisiting a very delicate conversation I was having with Jessica that is so steeped in personal hang-ups that it's like navigating a minefield of subconscious resentments and fears just to make sure the other person knows that you love them.
4. What were you doing 15 minutes ago?
Trying to figure out how to retrieve my LiveJournal password after getting the itch when life long livejournal friend Kristen Unger posted about her's.
5. Something that happened to you in 1985?
In 1985, as far as I can remember at this point, I was in Cave Spring Methodists' preschool. Wearing He-Man sleeveless shirts and making a general typical 80s boy mess of the world around me in the best possible way. Things I think I remember from that time were a Mr. Yuck puppet show, which fascinated me, and this belt, like a boy scout belt in the way it clasped, which about drove me to my first panic attack in my inability to make the thing re-lash.
6. Your prom night?
Prom night felt like a very official function you kind of had to do, sort of like taking communion when you're that age and not really knowing what you believe. I was glad I went with Hillary, who I remember looking very lovely that evening. I went through all the ritualistic motions of it, renting this kind of tux, the flower wrist thing, dinner at Stephen's Restaurant maybe before hand? We went to prom at the Hotel Roanoke, it was fine. I realize in retrospect I really don't like crowds, a sort of weird combination of social anxiety but also the desire to see my friends but also also the desire to never see half my class again. We left early if I recall correctly. I wasn't drinking any more then so there was very little of the kind kind of other typical hallmarks from "prom night". No hotel room, no parties. My parents were chaperones at our after prom so I was obligated to go there for at least a bit. That was perhaps a little odder than prom because it was at another's school's athletics center? We went home and changed clothes before hand and I didn't sleep with Hillary that night even though we were home alone. It wasn't like either of us were virgins or it was going to be some coming of age thing to have sex after prom, but like the whole thing, this kind of expectation that you should follow the script of this "formative" ritual was really enough to keep me on the straight and narrow. I don't remember much after leaving after prom.
I still like to slow dance.
7. Last thing you said aloud?
"Just imagine using one of those lovely large landscapes. The valleys of the mountain in a way mirroring the V on the back of the chair." - Will Sellari, as a very typical and sometimes romantic art director
8. Last thing some one said to you?
"Oh, I really like these" - Amber, in reference to JP's photos of mountains I was showing her
9. Worst thing currently on television?
You know, I don't really know. "Television" is very different now, streaming and all that. I would say uniformly though that if I had to start honing in on it it would be that people like Jake Paul can make a more than a healthy living off being awful on YouTube.
10. What was in the mail today?
A lovely summons for jury duty.
11. How many different beverages have you had today?
Oh man, I think my diet consists of mostly liquids now. For breakfast I had some vegan protein breakfast drink, yerba mate tea, sparkling water, and oatmeal. Yesterday I drank one of my favorite happy kidney drinks though, you kind of make it like tea but all it is is lemon juice, a touch of salt, Thai basil leaves, and a bit of honey. I know, I'm getting old...
12. What is your favorite part of the day?
My favorite part is when I forget which part of the day it is, lose track of time, and just love the crap out of whatever it is I'm doing.
13. Your current To-do list?
More product photos, community podcast, drugs in Roanoke podcast, get a guy elected sheriff, get another guy elected commissioner of revenue, make plans for me and the kids for spring break, get my car fixed, and not go totally broke. Also, I'm wondering what happened to 14-17?
18. Least favorite place to shop?
Websites with bad UI, places you try to shop at because they're local but make is so impossible to want to return there despite the fact that they're local because somehow they're in business despite of themselves, and Walmart, which I know sounds classists but hear me out, fuck the Waltons.
19. Last thing you bought?
A bunch of dinner and groceries from the Roanoke Co+Op, including a piece of blueberry covered lemon cheesecake and some shampoo I like that was on sale.
20. Last gift you received?
There are the daily gifts and support which is always appreciated. But in terms of gift gift, JP bought me a dance in Fortnite and it's been ongoing hilarity and grinding ever since.
21. Funniest thing you heard all day?
"You're hearing it all man." -Yogi at Yellow Dog Studios <- this was from the old one and a quick note on that because one day I will forget this, I was over at the studio with Carter and during playback of something I was commenting on what it reminded me of or what I thought the influences were there. I have no idea what I said but Yogi's response to that was very affirming.
Funniest thing today? It's early, nothing too much yet.
22. what color is ur front door?
Wooden and glass, same door.
24. Beautiful is:
A life free of anxiety and failure due to being paralyzed by fear of failure.
25. Describe your keychain:
You know I did this thing a while back where I tried to put only the essential keys I needed on my keyring along with like maybe one useful item like a carabiner. Now it's like a carabiner, some leatherman sort of carabiner, my keys, work keys, Jessica keys, and a random extra keyring just in case.
26. Where do you keep your change?
I have a little film canister in my bag where I keep random coins I find that seem like they'd be the source of good luck. It's not like I'm hoarding pennies, it's like one of them is some weird silver coin from Italy and a peso from one time when I was in Mexico. You know, magic coins.
27. Say something to the number 1 person in your Top 8:
Carter Arrington is my philosophical Alan Watts Mick Goodrick, Ride or Die, best friend forever. I have many other best friends like him but he will forever be the first and one of a few people who I feel like truly knows me.
28. Describe your winter coat:
My winter coat this year... I think I had like four, including this long green wool dress coat.
29. What was the weather like on your graduation day?
It was December in Austin, so it felt like the start of fall in Virginia. It was an odd day. I remember both being excited and unconcerned, my life at the time was a lot like that, the prospect of my wild intangible interests like making videos for some coffee shop and the apathetic shoulder shrugging approach to impending adulthood where I needed to have rent covered and money and a job. Eventually that resulted in me working for Glamour Shots.
30. Last ice cream flavor?
Like what would I like my last flavor of ice cream I eat to be or what was the last flavor I had? My last meal ice cream would be whatever that pecan old man flavor was that they had at Hits before they were Blue Cow Ice Cream, that or my other perpetual lost old man flavors, boysenberry from TCBY, tea berry from some weird farm / ice cream stand in Orwigsburg, Jell-O pudding pops, and finally Monster Pops, which, while technically not ice-cream, it is the first desert of my heart.
31. Last rainbow you saw?
I was watering the yard on Sunday and Jessica noted it creating a rainbow. I noted that unlike god, my rainbow was not a promise that I wouldn't flood the yard but a promise to flood it.
32. Something you are excited about:
I'm taking my kids on an accidental trip to Cincinnati this week. I shoveled a bunch of money into a fire made of guilt and promise so here's wishing for the best!