(no subject)
I will not be manipulated again.
I will not be walked all over.
I will not fall for this crap.
I will not be used again.
I will not be taken for granted.
I will NOT put up with your shady behavior.
I will NOT act like it is OK.
I WILL NOT BE HURT.
I don't know if you realize that I am not stupid, and that I see right through all the crap you are telling me right now. I don't know if you realize that I am almost 100% sure you are lying to me again. I don't know if you realize that this WILL be the END of our friendship if you don't knock it off. It WILL be the END if you get back with her or are "friends" with her again. There are NO questions about it. I have told you before, but I will not, and should not have to tell you again, this it will ruin "us", whatever that means, and our friendship FOR EVER if you do this.
I forgave you once, and I warned you that if it happened again, that that would have to be the end. But, I am not sure that you understand that I am serious. I love you and I don't want to lose you...but honestly, I am not going to put up with this once a year for the rest of my life. I will not put up with it anymore. I should not have to. If you think that it is ok to do this to a "best friend" then I guess you don't really know what it means to be a TRUE friend at all.
It sucks that I can't trust you right now. I thought I had gotten past this. Actually, I thought that WE had gotten past this. But apparently not. If you want to keep on playing this game, you better find someone else to play it with, because I will not participate anymore. I was willing enough to forgive you for it the first time. To put it behind us and move on. To still be friends with you, even though honestly I probably shouldn't have given you a second look, let alone a second chance. But I stuck up for you. I told everyone who was telling me to write you off, that I would give you a second chance becuase sometimes people make dumb mistakes and do dumb things. After that though, I promised myself I would NEVER let you do it to me again. And you said that you would fix it, and that it wouldn't happen again. Yet, here we are a year later, and I don't know what to believe. Part of me wants to believe that I am just reading into things without giving you a chance to explain. But the rest of me, thinks that you don't deserve a chance to explain.
I have so little trust with you on this issue right now, that I don't believe anything that has come our of your mouth for the last week. You tell me that you aren't talkin to her. That you only talked to her the time that she called you at church. But, I don't believe you..because you betrayed my trust SO much when you lied to me the first time this happened. I wish that I could just trust you and not think about it. But even since then, you have acted really shady. Ever since that phone call you have acted funny. I don't know if its because the call shocked you as much as it did me, or because it didn't shock you at all and you don't know how to deal with it since I was there and you know how I feel about it.
My trust is shattered once again. We are still friends...by a tiny little thread. I wish I could believe you. I wish I could trust you...but I can't until you prove to me that you are worthy of my trust. And honestly, I don't know how you are going to manage to do that right now. Because telling me, isn't going to have to work. I am going to have to see with my own eyes that there is nothing going on. But since I don't see you, I don't know how that is going to be possible.
Maybe this is the beginning of the final goodbye. I have to wonder is this it? Is it really going to be it this time? Are we really going to have to have a final goodbye to our friendship? I hoped we wouldn't and that it would never come to this. But it just might actually happen. Funny the timing of things. One year ago...you did this. And here we are back at square one with it looking like you might attempt it just one more time. And this time, I will be the one to say goodbye. You will be the one left standing and wondering. I WILL NOT BE HURT BY YOU.
My guard is up, and the walls are high. You will not break them. But it is up to you to either prove to me that I can shorten the walls, or to prove to me that it is time for one final goodbye.
I will not be walked all over.
I will not fall for this crap.
I will not be used again.
I will not be taken for granted.
I will NOT put up with your shady behavior.
I will NOT act like it is OK.
I WILL NOT BE HURT.
I don't know if you realize that I am not stupid, and that I see right through all the crap you are telling me right now. I don't know if you realize that I am almost 100% sure you are lying to me again. I don't know if you realize that this WILL be the END of our friendship if you don't knock it off. It WILL be the END if you get back with her or are "friends" with her again. There are NO questions about it. I have told you before, but I will not, and should not have to tell you again, this it will ruin "us", whatever that means, and our friendship FOR EVER if you do this.
I forgave you once, and I warned you that if it happened again, that that would have to be the end. But, I am not sure that you understand that I am serious. I love you and I don't want to lose you...but honestly, I am not going to put up with this once a year for the rest of my life. I will not put up with it anymore. I should not have to. If you think that it is ok to do this to a "best friend" then I guess you don't really know what it means to be a TRUE friend at all.
It sucks that I can't trust you right now. I thought I had gotten past this. Actually, I thought that WE had gotten past this. But apparently not. If you want to keep on playing this game, you better find someone else to play it with, because I will not participate anymore. I was willing enough to forgive you for it the first time. To put it behind us and move on. To still be friends with you, even though honestly I probably shouldn't have given you a second look, let alone a second chance. But I stuck up for you. I told everyone who was telling me to write you off, that I would give you a second chance becuase sometimes people make dumb mistakes and do dumb things. After that though, I promised myself I would NEVER let you do it to me again. And you said that you would fix it, and that it wouldn't happen again. Yet, here we are a year later, and I don't know what to believe. Part of me wants to believe that I am just reading into things without giving you a chance to explain. But the rest of me, thinks that you don't deserve a chance to explain.
I have so little trust with you on this issue right now, that I don't believe anything that has come our of your mouth for the last week. You tell me that you aren't talkin to her. That you only talked to her the time that she called you at church. But, I don't believe you..because you betrayed my trust SO much when you lied to me the first time this happened. I wish that I could just trust you and not think about it. But even since then, you have acted really shady. Ever since that phone call you have acted funny. I don't know if its because the call shocked you as much as it did me, or because it didn't shock you at all and you don't know how to deal with it since I was there and you know how I feel about it.
My trust is shattered once again. We are still friends...by a tiny little thread. I wish I could believe you. I wish I could trust you...but I can't until you prove to me that you are worthy of my trust. And honestly, I don't know how you are going to manage to do that right now. Because telling me, isn't going to have to work. I am going to have to see with my own eyes that there is nothing going on. But since I don't see you, I don't know how that is going to be possible.
Maybe this is the beginning of the final goodbye. I have to wonder is this it? Is it really going to be it this time? Are we really going to have to have a final goodbye to our friendship? I hoped we wouldn't and that it would never come to this. But it just might actually happen. Funny the timing of things. One year ago...you did this. And here we are back at square one with it looking like you might attempt it just one more time. And this time, I will be the one to say goodbye. You will be the one left standing and wondering. I WILL NOT BE HURT BY YOU.
My guard is up, and the walls are high. You will not break them. But it is up to you to either prove to me that I can shorten the walls, or to prove to me that it is time for one final goodbye.