God sure does have a sense of humor...
So, things have been crazy since I got back here.
My classes are going great...with the exception of one, but I think that will be ok too eventually.
CSER is going good soo far. The new workers are kind of different....but I think that once they get more comfortable it will be better. I do miss our old kids though....they are all so grown up! I saw Tre last night....ADORABLE. And everytime I see Lexi she hangs all over me. Gotta love it :) Our new kids are so shy and quiet. They like dont really talk at all. Last night there was an autistic kid...and his parents did tell us (which is a whole different story), but pretty much the kid tried to take me out when I touched him. It was NOT a good situation, but oh well, what can you do.
The roommate situation is good. I LOVE Karyn to death...I don't know what I would do without her. God sure knew what he was doing when He put us in a room together last year. Suzy's good too....we do have our days though, but even considering that my room situation this year is SO much better than last year! It's great so far!
And then the boy situation....here's where God's sense of humor comes in. As we all know, Wes and I have been friends for almost 2 years now. We've had some past "issues" with relationshipness and other such things. We had a conversation about dating my freshman year but it was a one sided thing, so we just stayed friends. Sophmore year, we had to have a talk about the definition and lines of our friendship because of some things that were being said and asked by other people. Then, he started dating Danielle, and our friendship pretty much fell to crap. They broke up, and it was like him and I had never missed a beat---which was a God thing considering the situation. Well, we talked all summer pretty much and nothing was really different...until I got back down here. Things started to become like they had been sophmore year when we had to have "the talk." Over the last 3 weeks, things have started progressing I guess you could say. We started hanging out one on one more and more. My roommate Karyn noticed that he was acting different towards me, as did I and Hannah also. BUt, I really didn't think anything of it....that is until on Monday when he invited me to a bbq at his boss' house. Now, you have to understand that Wes has always been the type to keep our friendship separate from his work relationships as well as his relationships back home. So this was a huge deal. I went, we had a good time, and he was SUPER nice. Not a bad deal right? Well except that he has NEVER acted like that to me before. Well before this happened I (and some friends that know the situation) we kind of wondering if maybe some feelings were developing.....mutually. Which I admit I am attracted to him, but because of our "past" I guess you could call it, I was really unsure of what I REALLY thought about the idea of having feelings for him again. I was trying to guard my heart, since I've been hurt by basically this same situation before...so I was deciding if it was worth the time and vulerability I was going to have to put forth. Well after several deep conversations with him this week, my emotions started running wild. I had been praying the whole time I was here about the "situation" as it started developing. I didn't want to put my heart in again and have it be hurt if nothiing was going to come out of it. To make the rest of a long story really short, last night we had to have a talk about the boundaries of our relationship...and I had to initiate it. I was NOT looking forward to it at all, becuase I -thought- I knew what was going to come of it. Another try at us "toning down" our friendship. BUT, God had other plans for this conversation, and it took a turn i was NOT expecting. As it turns out, we were both in the SAME EXACT place about our relationship/friendship...but neither of us knew what to do about it. So for right now, we are just going to take it slow with the idea of pursuing a relationship in the future. There are some things that he needs to work out and deal with (because of his previous relationship) before anything can happen between "us." That combined with the hours he is working at work right now and both of us being full time students with TONS of other obligations, we know that right now is NOT the right time for us to be in a relationship with one another even though we are both interested. Which is fine, and we both know that. We both know where we are headed now, and know that we need to be completely honest with each other the whole time or things are going to get really complicated.
So, for now at least, we are taking time to continue "getting to know each other" which I know sounds funny since we have known each other for 2 years...but there is still a LOT that we don't know about each other. We are going to try and hang with each others friends and such to see the other person in different situations and other things like that. We are just friends until we sit down and talk about it and decide to take it farther than that.
All of that to say, you NEVER know what the Lord has planned for you. This is the LAST thing I EVER expected to come from our friendship, especially because of our past issues. But, He knows whats right. And I know that if the timing is right, it will work. I'm sure God was looking down last night, laughing at us for ruling this out almost 2 years ago now.
Hope yall are doing well!
Love you!
My classes are going great...with the exception of one, but I think that will be ok too eventually.
CSER is going good soo far. The new workers are kind of different....but I think that once they get more comfortable it will be better. I do miss our old kids though....they are all so grown up! I saw Tre last night....ADORABLE. And everytime I see Lexi she hangs all over me. Gotta love it :) Our new kids are so shy and quiet. They like dont really talk at all. Last night there was an autistic kid...and his parents did tell us (which is a whole different story), but pretty much the kid tried to take me out when I touched him. It was NOT a good situation, but oh well, what can you do.
The roommate situation is good. I LOVE Karyn to death...I don't know what I would do without her. God sure knew what he was doing when He put us in a room together last year. Suzy's good too....we do have our days though, but even considering that my room situation this year is SO much better than last year! It's great so far!
And then the boy situation....here's where God's sense of humor comes in. As we all know, Wes and I have been friends for almost 2 years now. We've had some past "issues" with relationshipness and other such things. We had a conversation about dating my freshman year but it was a one sided thing, so we just stayed friends. Sophmore year, we had to have a talk about the definition and lines of our friendship because of some things that were being said and asked by other people. Then, he started dating Danielle, and our friendship pretty much fell to crap. They broke up, and it was like him and I had never missed a beat---which was a God thing considering the situation. Well, we talked all summer pretty much and nothing was really different...until I got back down here. Things started to become like they had been sophmore year when we had to have "the talk." Over the last 3 weeks, things have started progressing I guess you could say. We started hanging out one on one more and more. My roommate Karyn noticed that he was acting different towards me, as did I and Hannah also. BUt, I really didn't think anything of it....that is until on Monday when he invited me to a bbq at his boss' house. Now, you have to understand that Wes has always been the type to keep our friendship separate from his work relationships as well as his relationships back home. So this was a huge deal. I went, we had a good time, and he was SUPER nice. Not a bad deal right? Well except that he has NEVER acted like that to me before. Well before this happened I (and some friends that know the situation) we kind of wondering if maybe some feelings were developing.....mutually. Which I admit I am attracted to him, but because of our "past" I guess you could call it, I was really unsure of what I REALLY thought about the idea of having feelings for him again. I was trying to guard my heart, since I've been hurt by basically this same situation before...so I was deciding if it was worth the time and vulerability I was going to have to put forth. Well after several deep conversations with him this week, my emotions started running wild. I had been praying the whole time I was here about the "situation" as it started developing. I didn't want to put my heart in again and have it be hurt if nothiing was going to come out of it. To make the rest of a long story really short, last night we had to have a talk about the boundaries of our relationship...and I had to initiate it. I was NOT looking forward to it at all, becuase I -thought- I knew what was going to come of it. Another try at us "toning down" our friendship. BUT, God had other plans for this conversation, and it took a turn i was NOT expecting. As it turns out, we were both in the SAME EXACT place about our relationship/friendship...but neither of us knew what to do about it. So for right now, we are just going to take it slow with the idea of pursuing a relationship in the future. There are some things that he needs to work out and deal with (because of his previous relationship) before anything can happen between "us." That combined with the hours he is working at work right now and both of us being full time students with TONS of other obligations, we know that right now is NOT the right time for us to be in a relationship with one another even though we are both interested. Which is fine, and we both know that. We both know where we are headed now, and know that we need to be completely honest with each other the whole time or things are going to get really complicated.
So, for now at least, we are taking time to continue "getting to know each other" which I know sounds funny since we have known each other for 2 years...but there is still a LOT that we don't know about each other. We are going to try and hang with each others friends and such to see the other person in different situations and other things like that. We are just friends until we sit down and talk about it and decide to take it farther than that.
All of that to say, you NEVER know what the Lord has planned for you. This is the LAST thing I EVER expected to come from our friendship, especially because of our past issues. But, He knows whats right. And I know that if the timing is right, it will work. I'm sure God was looking down last night, laughing at us for ruling this out almost 2 years ago now.
Hope yall are doing well!
Love you!