Life.
Life is funny. Its one of those things that you can never really explain because there are just no words.
Its funny to me to see how people you may not have thought you would have anything in common with at first glance you end up having a great friendship with... its eerie..lol.
Someone told me how beautiful I looked tonite. It was a guy. And I think it was the first time in a long time that a guy had actually said you look beautiful instead of "hot" or some other non-flattering words that the male species believes to be a way to get in your pants. It struck me as .. something actually real.It was incredible.
I have been thinking quite a bit lately about what I really want in life. And I came to the conclusion that I just want to be happy. I am happier here in college than I have been in a long time. I feel like an adult. I dont have someone standing over me asking me 20 questions the minute I walk in the door.I can go out till two O'clock in the morning and come home and just go to bed if I want to. I can walk around in my underwear or have guys stay over or go out and drink . Or even better have sex.
.........But, the funny thing is .. I dont. I dont go out till two, or have guys stay overnight, or go out and drink. I instead go to class, go to the gym, go to rehersal, and go home.
Maybe all of this is the sting of loneliness talking or just me being irrational. who knows?
Or maybe its because I finally realize that I dont have to settle .. for anything. I dont have sex because Im not ready and I dont want to. I dont have a boyfriend at all. I dont go out drinking every weekend or thursday night in college. I dont.
Its so strange how things happen so quickley and how much people change over a short time.Its amazing to me.
Im going to bed to think. I love yall. Hope all is well.
Katie
Its funny to me to see how people you may not have thought you would have anything in common with at first glance you end up having a great friendship with... its eerie..lol.
Someone told me how beautiful I looked tonite. It was a guy. And I think it was the first time in a long time that a guy had actually said you look beautiful instead of "hot" or some other non-flattering words that the male species believes to be a way to get in your pants. It struck me as .. something actually real.It was incredible.
I have been thinking quite a bit lately about what I really want in life. And I came to the conclusion that I just want to be happy. I am happier here in college than I have been in a long time. I feel like an adult. I dont have someone standing over me asking me 20 questions the minute I walk in the door.I can go out till two O'clock in the morning and come home and just go to bed if I want to. I can walk around in my underwear or have guys stay over or go out and drink . Or even better have sex.
.........But, the funny thing is .. I dont. I dont go out till two, or have guys stay overnight, or go out and drink. I instead go to class, go to the gym, go to rehersal, and go home.
Maybe all of this is the sting of loneliness talking or just me being irrational. who knows?
Or maybe its because I finally realize that I dont have to settle .. for anything. I dont have sex because Im not ready and I dont want to. I dont have a boyfriend at all. I dont go out drinking every weekend or thursday night in college. I dont.
Its so strange how things happen so quickley and how much people change over a short time.Its amazing to me.
Im going to bed to think. I love yall. Hope all is well.
Katie