Everything else is gone.
I deleted all of my other entries, mainly due to how shitty i've been feeling and all of the other things that have been going on in my life seem to fucking suck.
I've applied at so many different places recently and none of them have called me back. I drove with Amber to the Outlets and applied at: Ecco, Skechers, DIMES, Paper Factory, Zumiez, The Food Court, Pfaltzgraf, KB, GAP, That suit store for really tall men, Music For A Song, Vans and Haager(or however you spell it). I gave all of these fine establishments a few calls back and the answer was always the same, "We're very sorry, although we were accepting applications when you came in, we've already found someone more suited for the position." Hallock's has always been a great place to work when I needed a place to go and no one else was hiring, but they won't need me until late July. Atleast i'll have my liscense by then, so I can just drive myself back and forth. I think I might just work 10-12 hour days there if I can because I need to save up all the money I can.
As far as school goes, i'm supposedly going to Brick County Votec for the Culinary Arts thing. I wanted to go to GCC and live with Amber, but since I have absolutely no money and no car and no job, I can't afford my half of the rent. Atleast with the certificate i'm going to get from the Votec classes i'll be able to work as a chef someplace, no one cares what you look like when you're in the kitchen.
I'm getting more tattoos as soon as I can fit the cash into my budget, and my hair is continuing to get longer and more awesome looking as far as dreads go. I think that the fact that I can't even wash my hair but once per month is really annoying, and I need to use special shampoos absent of any sort of chemical does not help. I look pretty ok though, I should change my picture to a more recent one but I don't really see the point.
Up until now, I had no idea what to say about the situation with Melissa and I. To be completely honest, I still don't. But I think it's safe to say that I feel like I couldn't possibly be more upset than I am right now. I know that I needed to change my whole life around like I did the first time, but I can't be treated like i'm 10 years old by my parents anymore. I just need things with my job and school to work out, but it's hard not to become extremely depressed by everything. I can't even say love you to the girl I love anymore, and that literally is killing me. I wake up everyday feeling empty. I go to sleep each night feeling lonely. I just hope things go back to how they were at some point.
Amber's birthday is in 8 days and she really wants a food processor so i'm trying to do everything I can to make sure she gets one. It's hard when you have no money though.
I think the real reason for me starting everything over is so that I can focus on the future rather than constantly seeing myelf bitching about the past. I want to write in this thing everyday, so if I do you'll see a very clear picture of what my life is like. I could die anyday, so when I do these will be my memoirs.
I've applied at so many different places recently and none of them have called me back. I drove with Amber to the Outlets and applied at: Ecco, Skechers, DIMES, Paper Factory, Zumiez, The Food Court, Pfaltzgraf, KB, GAP, That suit store for really tall men, Music For A Song, Vans and Haager(or however you spell it). I gave all of these fine establishments a few calls back and the answer was always the same, "We're very sorry, although we were accepting applications when you came in, we've already found someone more suited for the position." Hallock's has always been a great place to work when I needed a place to go and no one else was hiring, but they won't need me until late July. Atleast i'll have my liscense by then, so I can just drive myself back and forth. I think I might just work 10-12 hour days there if I can because I need to save up all the money I can.
As far as school goes, i'm supposedly going to Brick County Votec for the Culinary Arts thing. I wanted to go to GCC and live with Amber, but since I have absolutely no money and no car and no job, I can't afford my half of the rent. Atleast with the certificate i'm going to get from the Votec classes i'll be able to work as a chef someplace, no one cares what you look like when you're in the kitchen.
I'm getting more tattoos as soon as I can fit the cash into my budget, and my hair is continuing to get longer and more awesome looking as far as dreads go. I think that the fact that I can't even wash my hair but once per month is really annoying, and I need to use special shampoos absent of any sort of chemical does not help. I look pretty ok though, I should change my picture to a more recent one but I don't really see the point.
Up until now, I had no idea what to say about the situation with Melissa and I. To be completely honest, I still don't. But I think it's safe to say that I feel like I couldn't possibly be more upset than I am right now. I know that I needed to change my whole life around like I did the first time, but I can't be treated like i'm 10 years old by my parents anymore. I just need things with my job and school to work out, but it's hard not to become extremely depressed by everything. I can't even say love you to the girl I love anymore, and that literally is killing me. I wake up everyday feeling empty. I go to sleep each night feeling lonely. I just hope things go back to how they were at some point.
Amber's birthday is in 8 days and she really wants a food processor so i'm trying to do everything I can to make sure she gets one. It's hard when you have no money though.
I think the real reason for me starting everything over is so that I can focus on the future rather than constantly seeing myelf bitching about the past. I want to write in this thing everyday, so if I do you'll see a very clear picture of what my life is like. I could die anyday, so when I do these will be my memoirs.