writing heals the soul
"My life is waiting out there somewhere.
It's watchful eyes,
scanning a nameless station,
with a look of uncertainty and trepidation,
not knowing if I'll show.
So I'll gather what's left of me,
and head out to where the sun had promised me a better day."
the sun comes up every morning to present a better day. but there are nights that it cant get any better then it is right then. and then there are nights that the sun is a welcome sight. thats just part of life. kevin wrote the quote and asked me to write about it. my life has always been out there waiting for me to find it. its watched me throughout middle and high school and college. just waiting till i found it and what i was supose to do with my life. my life just sat there waiting for so long. it watched the mistakes and the losses and the pain. i never knew if i would find it. and it took along time for me to find it. alot of changes in me and alot of learning about who i am and what is important to me. but i really found that in the last couple years. my life isnt waiting anymore, its not waiting and watching. it takes alot of guts to gather whats left of you after the pain and the lies but there is something/someones that makes it all worth it picking yourself back up. there were/are people who made it worth it to me. i picked myself up and they helped put me back together. im whole again b/c of them. and now im walking into the sunlight with a smile on my face. b/c there are better days in the future. and the good days in the past let me know that the sun and the better days ahead are worth all of it. they are worth the waiting and being away. cause eventually it all falls into place. it takes time and sacrifice but it all falls into place to help build those better days. and i know it will all be worth the wait. it will be worth all the nights up talking and drinking with kevin and jay. it will be worth all the stories that ive told them so they know who i am. the better days that we will share together will be worth the past that has caused so much pain and learning. it will all be worth it when i can hold her again. it will all be worth it when there comes a time i dont have to miss her b/c she is here with me. it will all be worth it b/c she isnt like the girls in the past, she is more. so as ive finally caught up with my life on this broken road, and with the help of my friends ive put myself back together, i know we will all walk down this broken road into the sun so that the better days ahead of all of we will share together. b/c there are people that make everyday worth living and smiling for. no matter what you do tell those people how much they mean. b/c when you have lost people without telling them everything on your mind and in your heart, you learn quickly that things happen and you might not always be able to tell them. so i will make this short and simple:
Jay and Kevin - my brothers, thank you, you have always been there, and i know always will. you make it all make sense to me.
Paul - we have become family and its that simple. i just wish you could be out here more often.
"Her" - i miss you. it all makes sense to me now, even if im a little crazy. i can deal with that cause you make it all worth it. may 12, 2005 i will never forget that day....
So its been so long since ive seen the ocean, i guess we will........ 8/11/07
It's watchful eyes,
scanning a nameless station,
with a look of uncertainty and trepidation,
not knowing if I'll show.
So I'll gather what's left of me,
and head out to where the sun had promised me a better day."
the sun comes up every morning to present a better day. but there are nights that it cant get any better then it is right then. and then there are nights that the sun is a welcome sight. thats just part of life. kevin wrote the quote and asked me to write about it. my life has always been out there waiting for me to find it. its watched me throughout middle and high school and college. just waiting till i found it and what i was supose to do with my life. my life just sat there waiting for so long. it watched the mistakes and the losses and the pain. i never knew if i would find it. and it took along time for me to find it. alot of changes in me and alot of learning about who i am and what is important to me. but i really found that in the last couple years. my life isnt waiting anymore, its not waiting and watching. it takes alot of guts to gather whats left of you after the pain and the lies but there is something/someones that makes it all worth it picking yourself back up. there were/are people who made it worth it to me. i picked myself up and they helped put me back together. im whole again b/c of them. and now im walking into the sunlight with a smile on my face. b/c there are better days in the future. and the good days in the past let me know that the sun and the better days ahead are worth all of it. they are worth the waiting and being away. cause eventually it all falls into place. it takes time and sacrifice but it all falls into place to help build those better days. and i know it will all be worth the wait. it will be worth all the nights up talking and drinking with kevin and jay. it will be worth all the stories that ive told them so they know who i am. the better days that we will share together will be worth the past that has caused so much pain and learning. it will all be worth it when i can hold her again. it will all be worth it when there comes a time i dont have to miss her b/c she is here with me. it will all be worth it b/c she isnt like the girls in the past, she is more. so as ive finally caught up with my life on this broken road, and with the help of my friends ive put myself back together, i know we will all walk down this broken road into the sun so that the better days ahead of all of we will share together. b/c there are people that make everyday worth living and smiling for. no matter what you do tell those people how much they mean. b/c when you have lost people without telling them everything on your mind and in your heart, you learn quickly that things happen and you might not always be able to tell them. so i will make this short and simple:
Jay and Kevin - my brothers, thank you, you have always been there, and i know always will. you make it all make sense to me.
Paul - we have become family and its that simple. i just wish you could be out here more often.
"Her" - i miss you. it all makes sense to me now, even if im a little crazy. i can deal with that cause you make it all worth it. may 12, 2005 i will never forget that day....
So its been so long since ive seen the ocean, i guess we will........ 8/11/07