put it on me

[curvebllsrok75]

i think from now on you can blame me for everything... i kinda like the feeling that its all my fault

say:
if your lawn mower runs out of gas...call me up and bitch me out for not filling it up
if you get a flat tire... run inside and hit me with a broom telling me i should have seen this coming
if you trip over your shoe... scream from your room that i shouldnt have left my shit everywhere
if you fall down a flight of stairs... chase me down the street yelling that we should have taken the elevator
if we take the elevator and it plummets to the earth... curse my fat ass for wanting to ride it
if we survive the fall... tell me im a bitch for not understanding the pain of your broken leg
if i have a dagger thru my chest... explain to me what a dumbass i am for falling horizontally onto it

please submit other various situations in life you can blame me for because id like to be prepared to take the verbal punishment for anything that arises. thank you. have a nice day all