que tengo miedo perderte
Title: Que tengo miedo perderte
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Steven Gerrard/Xabi Alonso
Disclaimer: Fiction.
Summary: “Don’t tempt me. I can't afford that pleasure.”
“I’ve no idea what I think I’d find here,” is what Xabi hears when he opens the door and Stevie isn’t quite looking at him but he continues, “I just had to come. I am...apprehensive.” So Xabi lets him in.
It’s dark in the house; Xabi is reaching for the switch but Stevie catches his hand and holds it and says, “Don’t turn on the lights.” Xabi leaves it off but he still doesn’t get his hand back.
“Steven...?”
“It’s easier if you don’t look at me,” Stevie explains. “Or at least if I can’t see you.”
“Oh.”
Stevie groans. “It’s just...I can’t talk if you look at me. (Or if I can see you, I guess.)”
“I am sorry.” He sounds it too.
“Don’t apologize.” Stevie sighs. He’s not pacing but Xabi suspects that he would if he could will himself to let go of that hand. Instead, they stand very close and very still and Xabi lets Stevie have what he needs.
“I don’t know what I’m doing,” Stevie admits after awhile, “and I don’t know what I’m thinking.”
“So...stop thinking.”
“Don’t tempt me,” Stevie says seriously. “That would be...effortless. I have a family. Alex...and my girls. I can’t afford that pleasure.” Xabi says nothing now and Stevie tightens his hold.
“But I can’t let go either.” He brings his other hand to Xabi’s neck and lets his fingers rest there, where it’s deliciously warm and he can feel a quickening pulse under their skins. “I am a selfish man, Xabi; do you hate me?” Their lips are just a gasp apart now.
“Never.”
“Don’t make it so easy,” Stevie pleads breathlessly and Xabi hears a distinct desperation in his voice, “don’t make it so hard.”
“Don’t kiss me, then.”
A challenge, fierce and meaningless all at once. “Do you want that?”
“Never.”
Let it be, Steven; bésame.
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Steven Gerrard/Xabi Alonso
Disclaimer: Fiction.
Summary: “Don’t tempt me. I can't afford that pleasure.”
“I’ve no idea what I think I’d find here,” is what Xabi hears when he opens the door and Stevie isn’t quite looking at him but he continues, “I just had to come. I am...apprehensive.” So Xabi lets him in.
It’s dark in the house; Xabi is reaching for the switch but Stevie catches his hand and holds it and says, “Don’t turn on the lights.” Xabi leaves it off but he still doesn’t get his hand back.
“Steven...?”
“It’s easier if you don’t look at me,” Stevie explains. “Or at least if I can’t see you.”
“Oh.”
Stevie groans. “It’s just...I can’t talk if you look at me. (Or if I can see you, I guess.)”
“I am sorry.” He sounds it too.
“Don’t apologize.” Stevie sighs. He’s not pacing but Xabi suspects that he would if he could will himself to let go of that hand. Instead, they stand very close and very still and Xabi lets Stevie have what he needs.
“I don’t know what I’m doing,” Stevie admits after awhile, “and I don’t know what I’m thinking.”
“So...stop thinking.”
“Don’t tempt me,” Stevie says seriously. “That would be...effortless. I have a family. Alex...and my girls. I can’t afford that pleasure.” Xabi says nothing now and Stevie tightens his hold.
“But I can’t let go either.” He brings his other hand to Xabi’s neck and lets his fingers rest there, where it’s deliciously warm and he can feel a quickening pulse under their skins. “I am a selfish man, Xabi; do you hate me?” Their lips are just a gasp apart now.
“Never.”
“Don’t make it so easy,” Stevie pleads breathlessly and Xabi hears a distinct desperation in his voice, “don’t make it so hard.”
“Don’t kiss me, then.”
A challenge, fierce and meaningless all at once. “Do you want that?”
“Never.”
Let it be, Steven; bésame.