A series of you and me [CHAPTER 20]
Title: A series of you and me
Chapters: 20/?
Genre: Angst. Romance. Smut.
Warnings: Angst. Masturbation.
Ratings: PG-13 to R
Pairings: AoixUruha - ReitaxRuki (?)
Disclaimer: I only own my imagination ♪
Synopsis: Kouyou finds his life ruled by the glimpses of him he can see.
Comments: For the few support received, thank you so much :) I'm happy that you like it.
On the roof top of the hospital, Kouyou was taking a rest. Yuu wasn't far behind him, watching over him with attention. Even if his glasses were big, Yuu had seen through them...Kouyou's red eyes.
Obviously the other had cried and when Yuu asked how things went with his mother, Kouyou only replied "better than expected."
And he was now watching Kanagawa from the hospital, smoking a cigarette given by Yuu few seconds ago. The dark haired lit up one too and came closer to the younger, the smoke exhaled and swirling around them.
- So now?
Kouyou quickly glanced at Yuu's face who seemed fascinated by the view.
- I talked with my uncle...I'll be staying for few days until she recovers a little. I called Sakai and it's fine with him. And you?
Yuu smiled gently and finally looked back at him:
- Well then, I think my duty here's done. I'll go back to Tokyo because, even if I'm the boss of my own label, I should be working as soon as possible.
Kouyou nodded and added, looking away:
- You know...My uncle proposed that you can stay here too.
Yuu laughed, a bit embarassed:
- No thank you.
Kouyou pouted, arranging his glasses:
- Well do as you want.
- I appreciate the offer but, I really have to go back home. The sooner, the better.
A short silence settled between them. Kouyou thought that without Yuu, he wouldn't have been able to meet his mother and talk with her about the past. Without Yuu, he'd still be at home, destroying himself, making himself sick, ruining his life because there were ideas in his head that he didn't deserve love and happiness, peacefulness even.
He was always at war with himself.
And even now that he faced his mother, there was a part of his mind telling him that no, it didn't mean he would be happy now. Happiness was a forbidden feeling to him, he was cursed since his birth like in fairy tales. He didn't know why but the few times he had felt lighter and grateful to life for the few good things he could receive, they were swept away by darkness, sadness and self destruction.
His life was a never-ending cycle of emotional rollercoaster. And the strong belief that his life would never be right was always haunting his entire self, terrifying him at night and waking him up from nightmares.
And Yuu, here, Yuu who had lost support at a young age, who had to live alone like he did, Yuu was the very opposite.
Optimistic, warm and sweet.
His gentleness was so bright that, even just by standing right next to him, Kouyou could feel it radiating from his body. Yuu was the kind of human he wanted to keep around, yet would reject because it was too painful.
Kouyou was so used to live in the dark that Yuu's light was unbearable at times.
- Do you miss her?
Yuu sighed, his eyes for the cancer stick between his fingers:
- A lot.
- Thank you.
Yuu looked into Kouyou's orbs and saw that the emotion was strong for the other:
- Thank you.
Yuu smiled, he didn't want to talk. He just admired Kouyou's beautiful features.
And Kouyou lost himself in his smile. The same smile he had seen in the toilets of a club almost two years ago. The same smile he saw last summer when he had followed Yuu until his place. The same smile that healed his heart when they were in his bed, late at night, under the moon's light.
He had never planned Yuu to be this important. Of course he knew where he lived, he knew that he had to sit at Le Petit Crème every morning near the window to see him walk by the coffee shop on his way to work...He knew that he loved his coffee black.
He had learnt to know Yuu's habits and little world like you go to movies. You sit there and as time passes by, you get to discover a world unknown.
And Yuu's seemed like a vaste kingdom Kouyou craved to explore.
But he didn't want to pay the price of it. Being around Yuu would mean that they would suffer because happiness was always stolen away from Kouyou's hands. Always.
Yuu let his thumb erase Kouyou's tears, slowly. He then grabbed Kouyou's coat-tails and dragged him closer. There was a strand of hair that had fallen out of Kouyou's ponytail. Yuu tenderly put it behind his ear and looked into his eyes again.
"Things are bound to progress for the better, whether gradually or sometimes by leaps and bounds."
Leibniz. Science of Happiness.
He didn't remember the whole sentence about when things would get worse, but it said something among the lines...That when things seemed to change for the worse "this should be regarded as similar to the way in which we sometimes retrace our footsteps in order to leap forward with greater vigour."
- Do you know Leibniz?
Yuu laughed, surprised by Kouyou's sudden question:
- The philosopher?
Kouyou smiled through the tears.
- Good.
Yuu frowned with a smile, curious about why Kouyou brought out this subject all of sudden but the other didn't say anything else and just chuckled childishly.
He only stopped when Yuu drew him to himself and gasped when this one embraced him sweetly, whispering to his ear:
- I love it when you laugh. It's like finally someone switched on the light, like spring has come and winter is gone.
Kouyou closed his eyes and for a little while forgot everything.
Takanori opened his tired eyes and heard that someone was snoring. He looked at his right and saw Akira, sleeping. Then he remembered they had watched movies late that night.
It wasn't particularly a problem to wake up next to Akira. The only thing that could really annoy Takanori was the fact that his body would want to react to it a bit too excitingly.
It wasn't like the man who was sleeping beside him was exactly his crush...
Or that the alarm clock was now on and it would wake Akira up anytime...
- Shit!
Takanori stopped it and groaned of exasperation. He decided to show his back and stay on his side so Akira wouldn't see his little problem.
The older could be heard, yawning and sitting up in the bed:
- Morning Taka!
The hairdresser rolled his eyes, anxious:
- Morning...
Akira bent over him, worried:
- What is it? Do you feel sick or something?
The other mumbled, trying his best to hide his erection:
- No no no no! I...I just take some extra rest.
Akira smiled:
- Ok then, let me go take a shower while you sleep.
Takanori didn't reply, only smiling awkwardly to his best friend and sighed of deep relief when this one closed the door. Thinking about Akira in his shower was definitely killing him. Hot and bothered he couldn't resist any longer and let his hand take care of his manly problem.
Things were fine and Takanori, eyes closed, was even pleased by himself imagining dirty things happening in his head with Akira.
He so lost himself in his fantasy that he didn't notice Akira at the door, completely abashed by Takanori's morning little treatment to himself.
Akira turned around quietly, dressed in the clothes he was wearing the day before and decided to send Takanori a message later. He was red like a tomatoe and didn't really want to disturb his best friend.
When Takanori left his bed ten minutes later, he frowned as Akira wasn't replying from the bathroom when he was calling his name and wondered where he was when finally, he pushed the door open to find nobody inside.
His cellphone quickly rang and Takanori's intuition was telling him that it was a bad sign:
"I finally decided to take a shower at my place since I have my things there...Sorry I left like this, see you."
Takanori looked at the wall of his living room and hit his head repeatedly:
- Fucking shit! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck me!!
His phone rang again, but it was a call this time and Takanori excitedly shouted the name appearing on his screen:
- KOUYOU!
The other grimaced, taking a bit of distance with his cellphone as the hairdresser yelled loudly his name:
- Matsumoto I'm not deaf ok.
Takanori only laughed in response, happy to get a call from Kouyou after the last time they had seen each other:
- Sure you are with all the masturbating!
Which sentence in fact helped Takanori remember that he was the one masturbating this morning.
- At least I try to be sexually active, can we be this optimistic about you ?
The hairdresser sat on his couch, brought down by Kouyou's words and Akira's text message:
- Well in a matter of minutes I sent my sexual life to trash so, let's say no.
Kouyou made an interested sound:
- Oho, what happened? You get laid when I'm not around?
Takanori sighed and Kouyou could tell he was indeed sad about something:
- I think I just screwed up my chances to even taste Mister SS.
Kouyou giggled:
- Are you into nazis or what?
- Hell no! Mister Sex Symbol! Suzuki!
Kouyou laughed even more:
- Jeez Takanori. Find something else please.
But the hairdresser ignored his comment:
- Do you know that I even stopped fantasizing over Kimura Takuya for him?!
Kouyou grimaced:
- What? You like Kimura Takuya? That old thing?
Takanori made an offended sound:
- Hey he's sexy!
- He's not!
- More than you!
- Good I see you have low standards about sexiness.
- What are you saying?
- Only the truth!
Takanori sighed and stayed quiet few seconds which worried Kouyou:
- Hey little diva?
- I thought no guy in the world would make me stop fanboying over Kimura Takuya. But he does.
Kouyou smiled.
- Well then, instead of crying over yourself, why don't you just go and confess?
- Not after what happened few minutes ago.
- Will you tell me now?
- No.
Kouyou sighed.
- Hm, I can't help if you don't tell me.
Takanori groaned of frustration:
- I can't talk about it over the phone. Can I come over?
- I'm not in Tokyo Taka-chan.
- Hu? Where are you?
- At the hospital in Kanagawa with my mother. I'll be there another day or two so wait for me.
- Nothing bad happened?!
Kouyou smiled, finding back Takanori's big heart:
- Don't worry, things are getting better. I called you because I will have a little favor to ask you when I'm back.
- Alright, just tell me when you'll be back then.
- I will! From now Taka, stop worrying, we'll find a way to lead you into Suzuki's bed.
- Hm...By-bye.
- See you little diva!
Takanori stared at the wallpaper of his cellphone with sad eyes.
A picture of him and Akira, smiling.
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Well then, a quick update. Thank you everyone for rewarding me ♥ It really cheers me up as a writer :) I hope you had a nice Christmas and wish you all the best for the upcoming new year! ^^