trouble sleeping
I'm having trouble falling asleep tonight. Rather than lay there and toss and turn, I brought the laptop up and decided to sit in the window seat and play on the computer for a while. I made a new icon, so I guess it wasn't completely fruitless.
*looking over to our bed, watching his chest rise and fall with his deep breathing as he sleeps peacefully*
Life has been so busy lately. I've had a lot of family obligations on the mainland lately, which has made for less time for Lance and I together. Jessica is growing up so fast, I feel like I have to hold on to every moment with her now and make it last as long as I can. It's hard to realize she needs me less and less now. I'm having a hard time letting go of that tiny baby we brought home nine months ago. Nine months ago today as a matter of fact. *looking at the clock* Almost to the hour.
She's getting such a personality now. She loves to make momma and daddy laugh. She loves to test her boundaries with us as well. She tried crying to get her way the other night, and Lance wasn't having any part of that. I'm glad he was strong, because I don't want a spoiled child. On the other hand... I just wanted to give her what she wanted so she wouldn't cry. I'm so easy when it comes to those I love. I just want them to be happy all the time.
She has started doing this little grunt when she wants something. It's so funny to watch and listen to her. She does this little bounce and grunts until she has your attention. She did that tonight after I gave her a taste of potato. She decided it was pretty good and had to share the rest with me. When that wasn't enough she started grunting and Lance shared his with her too. We ended up putting it on her tray and letting her "feed" herself. Needless to say, it was every where... up her nose, in her hair, between all of her fingers. *laughs* It was so damned cute.
Lance stayed down and cleaned up the mess while I bathed her and got her ready for bed. I was rocking her while she nursed and all of the sudden it hit me. This is one of the last times she and I will share that. She began weaning herself from nursing last month, and is down to only nursing before going to sleep for the night. The plan is to have her completely weaned before we leave her with gramma and grampa in Mississippi at the end of this week. I couldn't help but count how many more times we will get to share that special bond.
*tearing up again at that thought*
Okay... now I'm crying again. I've got to stop this. It's not an ending, rather a new beginning for her... onto bigger and better things.
*hearing Lance's voice as he reaches for me, calling to me*
*hitting update and closing the laptop... walking over and slipping my robe off, setting it on the chair and slipping back into bed*
*feeling him pull me back into his arms and run his hand over my hair, laying my head on his chest as we whisper our love for one another*
*listening as he softly sings me to sleep*
*looking over to our bed, watching his chest rise and fall with his deep breathing as he sleeps peacefully*
Life has been so busy lately. I've had a lot of family obligations on the mainland lately, which has made for less time for Lance and I together. Jessica is growing up so fast, I feel like I have to hold on to every moment with her now and make it last as long as I can. It's hard to realize she needs me less and less now. I'm having a hard time letting go of that tiny baby we brought home nine months ago. Nine months ago today as a matter of fact. *looking at the clock* Almost to the hour.
She's getting such a personality now. She loves to make momma and daddy laugh. She loves to test her boundaries with us as well. She tried crying to get her way the other night, and Lance wasn't having any part of that. I'm glad he was strong, because I don't want a spoiled child. On the other hand... I just wanted to give her what she wanted so she wouldn't cry. I'm so easy when it comes to those I love. I just want them to be happy all the time.
She has started doing this little grunt when she wants something. It's so funny to watch and listen to her. She does this little bounce and grunts until she has your attention. She did that tonight after I gave her a taste of potato. She decided it was pretty good and had to share the rest with me. When that wasn't enough she started grunting and Lance shared his with her too. We ended up putting it on her tray and letting her "feed" herself. Needless to say, it was every where... up her nose, in her hair, between all of her fingers. *laughs* It was so damned cute.
Lance stayed down and cleaned up the mess while I bathed her and got her ready for bed. I was rocking her while she nursed and all of the sudden it hit me. This is one of the last times she and I will share that. She began weaning herself from nursing last month, and is down to only nursing before going to sleep for the night. The plan is to have her completely weaned before we leave her with gramma and grampa in Mississippi at the end of this week. I couldn't help but count how many more times we will get to share that special bond.
*tearing up again at that thought*
Okay... now I'm crying again. I've got to stop this. It's not an ending, rather a new beginning for her... onto bigger and better things.
*hearing Lance's voice as he reaches for me, calling to me*
*hitting update and closing the laptop... walking over and slipping my robe off, setting it on the chair and slipping back into bed*
*feeling him pull me back into his arms and run his hand over my hair, laying my head on his chest as we whisper our love for one another*
*listening as he softly sings me to sleep*