(no subject)
I had a very lazy day today.
I was a bum all day, then proceeded to head over to Anthony's.
He cooked dinner for Jedward, Jared, himself, and I.
Delicious Adobo with rice.
I love the constant Phillipino cooking that's been going on lately.
It really make me miss my family.
If I had the money, I'd run away to Cali with Adam for a few weeks.
Stay with Nana and see the kids.
Eat her home cookin and chill out on the porch with Charlene; laughing, and telling stories about how crazy the people in our lives are.
I could spend all day, dreaming of what I wish for.
I've been finding myself, a bit lonely lately.
I long for the romance I see in movies and commercials.
But, at the same time, I want to see if I can function by myself.
I've spent the last year and a half with somebody.
I don't remember what it's like to be on my own.
I can't remember the last time I wasn't even talking to a boy.
I've always had somebody to toy with.
I feel like I need to grow up from my usual playful, kitten self; batting around boys like mice, constantly losing interest.
I need to become an independent cat.
For lack of a better metaphor...
I feel this is the time for me to stand on my own two feet for once.
In all aspects of my life.
I am NINETEEN.
I want something to show for it!
Which bring me to another topic...
There are many things I've been procrastinating.
I know, I just need to bite the bullet and sit down and deal with this.
But, I don't know what the hell to say.
Every time I talk to somebody, confront them, I have an idea of what I'm going to say.
I pretty much plan out ahead of time, the points I'm going to make, the direction of the conversation, and key phrases that I'd like to say.
In a rare occurrence, I have no clue what I'm going to say.
Oh, boy.
Anyways, this post has quickly run on to a rambling jumble of words.
Half of these things won't make sense to anybody else, but me.
Although, the only reason I write in this journal is for me. Haha.
At least, that's what I tell myself every time I update.
It's part of the reason I can open up, and not censor what I write. To a point.
Here I go again.
GOODNIGHT!
I was a bum all day, then proceeded to head over to Anthony's.
He cooked dinner for Jedward, Jared, himself, and I.
Delicious Adobo with rice.
I love the constant Phillipino cooking that's been going on lately.
It really make me miss my family.
If I had the money, I'd run away to Cali with Adam for a few weeks.
Stay with Nana and see the kids.
Eat her home cookin and chill out on the porch with Charlene; laughing, and telling stories about how crazy the people in our lives are.
I could spend all day, dreaming of what I wish for.
I've been finding myself, a bit lonely lately.
I long for the romance I see in movies and commercials.
But, at the same time, I want to see if I can function by myself.
I've spent the last year and a half with somebody.
I don't remember what it's like to be on my own.
I can't remember the last time I wasn't even talking to a boy.
I've always had somebody to toy with.
I feel like I need to grow up from my usual playful, kitten self; batting around boys like mice, constantly losing interest.
I need to become an independent cat.
For lack of a better metaphor...
I feel this is the time for me to stand on my own two feet for once.
In all aspects of my life.
I am NINETEEN.
I want something to show for it!
Which bring me to another topic...
There are many things I've been procrastinating.
I know, I just need to bite the bullet and sit down and deal with this.
But, I don't know what the hell to say.
Every time I talk to somebody, confront them, I have an idea of what I'm going to say.
I pretty much plan out ahead of time, the points I'm going to make, the direction of the conversation, and key phrases that I'd like to say.
In a rare occurrence, I have no clue what I'm going to say.
Oh, boy.
Anyways, this post has quickly run on to a rambling jumble of words.
Half of these things won't make sense to anybody else, but me.
Although, the only reason I write in this journal is for me. Haha.
At least, that's what I tell myself every time I update.
It's part of the reason I can open up, and not censor what I write. To a point.
Here I go again.
GOODNIGHT!