naked dance party
it's about that time of afternoon happening again. dancing and prancing and buttshakin' and feelin' good and honest, safe and strong.... delicious in between waiting for the rock awesome recovered and survived woman from all my HSER classes to call so we can study and research and grow. making mental lists with too few things crossed off, and wondering how much i can run today without hurting myself. hmmm.... endorphins give you wings, who needs prayers when i have faith in my body, trust in myself. fuck the rest.
i'm learning how to act like someone's girlfriend, without having decided that i could ever belong to that kind of a conception. moving slowly, almost sweetly, not having to be violent to feel. allowing people to walk me to my doorstep, and not give them too evil of a glare. these basic interactions are so foreign, i question how long i'll last. if these adaptations will prove themselves worthwhile for all the contradictory things i wonder of.
making an inventory of the last year, and forgiving the things that i won't allow anymore.
... i want to be a human being not a human doing...
it feels so good to be sore. nothings worth missing, everything is worth living, and fuck the melancholy in between, i'd rather be running.
i'm learning how to act like someone's girlfriend, without having decided that i could ever belong to that kind of a conception. moving slowly, almost sweetly, not having to be violent to feel. allowing people to walk me to my doorstep, and not give them too evil of a glare. these basic interactions are so foreign, i question how long i'll last. if these adaptations will prove themselves worthwhile for all the contradictory things i wonder of.
making an inventory of the last year, and forgiving the things that i won't allow anymore.
... i want to be a human being not a human doing...
it feels so good to be sore. nothings worth missing, everything is worth living, and fuck the melancholy in between, i'd rather be running.