screw you
One thing this wholes urgery thing has taught me besides i need to work on my time management and prepare for unexpected events better, is that i have fewer friends than i thought some are unexpected. I asked many people to come visit me. some couldnt for good reasons, some i knew wouldnt and i just allowed them to patronize me. of those who are my friends sam connet, maria, brett, susy, micah, tj, reece, mitch, chelsea, stacey, jon and schebel are the only ones. They are the only ones who visited (some multiple times) called, or at least sent messages. I have experienced complications and havent been able to return. I would expect those who thought i would be fine and didnt think much of the importance of a visit would now come running fearing for my health but now i know. of these people and it is especially noot limited to and if there is one comment towards her from any of you i will deal with your absence personally, is mary. I expected her to at least send her best wishes or regards but she doesnt. Sam asks why she hasnt visted and tells her to and she giggles and startes talking to somoeone else. this is very painful and i feel it a little less with each additional person i realize didnt care enough to say hello or ask how i was doing on the phone or see sam or brett and say if you see be tell him im pullin for ya. Part of me has died with this realization. I rememebr thinking that god was trying to teach me something fro mthis. Before i injured my self i just assumed this year was great. I had more friends, i was working harder in school and soccer. Now I see though, i dont have a lot of friends. I have aqquaintances and people who dont try to kill me wen they see me, who are kind enough to pretend i dont exist rather than to step on me on their way to where they need to go. My lesson is learned.