Fucken life
thats It..
I am officialy broken..
I cant stope crying..
Darren has fucked my life officaly and for good...
He went scyco tonight.... He has upset me soo much, I have spewd and i cant stop crying!!!! I dont know what to do...
All that started him of was, it was half an hour before elijahs bed time.. and I said I wanted him to let elijah settle down so he can go to bed with ease instead of hyped up..
Elijah wanted to play playdough and I said he couldnt cause he needs to settle down, just sit down and rest... (which he did.. he was just playing with his cars) so Darren starts pillow fighting with him etc..
im like WTF darren can YOU let him settle otherwise it will take him hours to get to sleep.
Darren starts calling me a fuckin control freek..
Elijah settles abit and darren comes out with Ice cream and trys to give elijah one.. I had elijah in my arms setteling him.. and darren leans over with ice cream.. WTF again...
I go off.. R u KIDDING u want to give ELijah some sugery ice-cream 1 min before he has to go to bed!...
I told HIM HE cant keep doing the oposite with elijah with what I say..
He comes out with im a control freek and I have to tell him that he is ment to be the "older and more mature" one he should KNOW that u dont give kids ice cream before bed and hype em up.. IF HE KNEW elijah like I did then this wouldnt have happened... He should have known as a parent!!!!
All darren ever wants to do is play..
I put elijah to bed, and thats when darren started being verbaly abusive!
calling me a fat slut, cow, fucken bitch. That I have something wrong with my head... That he does not care for this baby and is NOT going to be there for the birth.. anything.
He took the phone that he gave me for xmas and threw it outside and it smashed everywhere!!
He said I was just like his wife, wtf.. (his wife took his son away and made up shit liys about him) I told him I have always let him see his son... I always gave in to him being there to see Elijah when I didnt ahve to.. put up with all the stress he gave me.... hence me having to whinge about here to you girls....
But still that means NOTHING..
He also said I can stick elijahs gift for his birthday up my arse..
(I paied for the party he pays for the kitchen on layby)
I said fine, I will just cancel it and then use the money on it to buy something else!) He is not hurting me.. he is hurting his son. Elijah knew it was commming!!!
Im so scared he is going to come back now.. He still has the set of house keys I lent him one day when He needed to get back inside and he had no bike..
I want to change the front door lock...
And I told him that I will be ringing child support to get the money of him.. He has not put tax in for a while so he is gonna be in trouble..
I never wanted to do it... but I cant take it.. I cant keep feeling like shit!
I cant beleive that I let him walk all over me like that.. even tho my family around me would keep saying he is a fuck wit.. etc
and then I have another baby to him...
I dont know what to do.. I dont wanna give in to him again..
ever again!!!
I hate being so nice... it always happens to me.. did soo much in qld! I was used.... they didnt care about me.