My monthly break down
I knew this girl once; I promised her that the only way I would leave her life is if she pushed me away. Don’t worry readers, this wasn’t some sort of stalker thing, I was actually dating her at the time. It took me a long time to get over that break-up but that is life. I had the wrong ideas for a long time about that person; I thought she had indeed pushed me away for something and someone else. I don’t think I have ever really told her that I was wrong and I am sorry and I probably never will (it’s the asshole side of me, sorry). She is still around in most ways but she is not the reason I have to write this. I say having because if I don’t put this somewhere I will blow-up and that… is never pretty. That particular relationship was rather tough on me and yes it did mess me up for a little while, but in the long run things turned out best. How about that for luck? How many guys can say they had a crappy break-up where thing turned out good? Most of the time, a break-up especially a bad break-up never ends with talkative results much less a friendly result, but again I stray from the point. The point being; I am so scared in my life because I know that the list of people I want to remain in my life; the people I know now that I am making this same promise to will indeed pushed to hard (at least in my mind). I am starting to feel like I can’t talk about this to anyone because it never seems to make a difference, or it is none of their business, or I just can’t; besides talk is cheap. I usually feel that my friends and family would be better if they never heard from me again but then I realize I would be lost without them.