a habit that i just cant seem to break
everybody thinks. its normal to think. it would be abnormal to not
think at all but would it also be abnormal to think about things too
much? i find myself rationalizing everything and thinking about stuff
that shouldnt really be thought of according to others but to me its
something i should be thinking about. lately ive been catching myself
thinking about life. how im so bored with it and that im looking for
something more. im enjoying the things i have, im enjoying my time with
my friends and family but theres soemthing missing. i feel like i have
to achieve something. im feelign a bit of mediocrity and i dont like
it. i feel like im not taking my majors seriously and last nigth when
cam and ericka brought up my almost nearing graduation and the
question "what are you gonna do after?" oh creep!!! that creeped
me out! i planned to take my masters. where? my parents want new york. i really dont want to go there, id much rather stay here..but
what if im destined to be there? it would be a great way to smell some
fresh air and get away from everything here. but i dont really want to
get away. i dont want to escape i just want more.i dont feel the need
to escape. i mean escape from what? i guess im not satisfied. but
why am i not satisfied? actually thank god im not satisfied or else ill just settle for this and haha im not going to settle. i am gonna think straight..yup ill still think a lot but this time towards things that do matter:) haaay so intoxicating!