Glad They Haven't Gotten Youotis_otisSeptember 12 2004, 21:37:44 UTC
I'm relieved the workplace stuff hasn't sucked the soul out of you. The chicken data and hot-or-not posts had me a little worried. Your writing is so outstandingly entertaining here that I had to read it twice before I realized that the subject matter very closely resembles something my mother-in-law would rant. Puerto ricans? Michael Moore? Lazy municipal employees? The LIRR?
I can almost picture these emanating from the prematurely embalmed Elder Lurlene between wheezes and gasps, punctuated with pointless and misplaced question marks which are, unfortunately, your cue to agree with literally every word she has uttered.
The addition of the photo of Ponce-De-Moron is chilling. Having a patronizing and pseudo-intellectual image to go with the tales of woe really ruined my day.
And as to the shrieking harpy, with a little patience, some strategic knifework, and a little luck, she'll soon be back to inflicting that sonic weapon on waitresses, fellow PTA members, and the rest of the mopes on the unemployment line. Alternatively, she may find that she is suddenly reporting to someone whose standards, values and practices are utterly different than her current boss. Wonder how that would work out.
Probably unlike most card-carrying liberals, I too am revolted by Michael Moore, whose sole interest appears to be profit and self-promotion and whose donut budget alone dwarfs the cost of the whole fucking war.
Harpies and Donuts and Moms--Oh My!cuervolindaSeptember 13 2004, 05:38:07 UTC
Quite the contrary. The arrival of TardFest '04 in the workplace has had the opposite effect on my hateful rants, however, in my infinite paranoia, I have gingerly avoided this topic for the most part for obvious fiscal reasons. As soon as the fallout has settled around me, however, I may be forced to compile an entirely new list describing some of the key players who have not been named as of yet. Go in there today with the knowledge that your crusade is not merely personal, ...cont.
Harpies and Donuts and Moms--Oh My!cuervolindaSeptember 13 2004, 05:46:29 UTC
...But represents all that is just and worth defending in this small soap opera that has emerged. It was this realization that your Mr. W was unfairly being targeted as an incompetent oaf that drove me to betray the confidence of the targeter in the first place. I normally do not divulge such information, not so much to protect the source as to cover my own lily-white ass, but this situation has turned into such an unwarranted witchhunt, I was left with little choice in the matter. Godspeed, Agent Otis.
Harpies and Donuts 2: Electric BoogaloocuervolindaSeptember 13 2004, 05:53:13 UTC
And for God's sake, whatever the Harpy's fate may be, please just get her out of my earshot. I prefer the second scenario, actually, as I think a mere dismissal would leave her with far too much of that cunt ego of her's intact. A spin in the old Otis-a-matic however, would surely satisfy the depths of my vindictive little soul.
And add the crotchety old Momma “Arsenic” Lurlene to my list of hot women too.
Not That Kind of HotcuervolindaSeptember 13 2004, 08:11:34 UTC
Not three-way in a dirty trailer hot, hanging out and drinking and talking trash hot. I should have specified. I thought you would understand, in light of my fondness for men who are too young to remember the Electric Company on PBS. The only old things I get aroused by are American autos made in the 50's.
I can almost picture these emanating from the prematurely embalmed Elder Lurlene between wheezes and gasps, punctuated with pointless and misplaced question marks which are, unfortunately, your cue to agree with literally every word she has uttered.
The addition of the photo of Ponce-De-Moron is chilling. Having a patronizing and pseudo-intellectual image to go with the tales of woe really ruined my day.
And as to the shrieking harpy, with a little patience, some strategic knifework, and a little luck, she'll soon be back to inflicting that sonic weapon on waitresses, fellow PTA members, and the rest of the mopes on the unemployment line. Alternatively, she may find that she is suddenly reporting to someone whose standards, values and practices are utterly different than her current boss. Wonder how that would work out.
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And add the crotchety old Momma “Arsenic” Lurlene to my list of hot women too.
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Eyes...burning...nose...twitching...stomach...turning...must...stop...posting...
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