Saturday 2nd June, mid-afternoon
"Come on, kiddo," House said, scooping an unhappy Emma up from the change table. She was due for a feed and she wasn't holding back on letting him know about that. "Alright, I hear you," he told her, lifting her squirming body to his shoulder while she wailed and sucked furiously on her hand
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"I don't think it would make any difference to you either way," House replied. He was glad he had his sunglasses on. He was free to roll his eyes from behind them without being noticed while he took another slurp of his ice cream. Yes, he was - though he wouldn't admit it - extremely proud of his little girl but the whole public display of brainlessness women seemed to fall into whenever they laid eyes on a baby really wasn't his thing.
A moment later, he was saved by the bell as Cuddy ventured into the front lobby area. Dismissing the woman ogling him and Emma, he turned to Cuddy, licking his lips free of ice cream as she approached. He was satisfied to note she had a big, relaxed smile on her face. As she kissed Emma's head, he slurped his ice cream again and gave a one shouldered shrug at her question.
About to answer, he frowned down at the dollop of melted ice cream that had dropped onto the side of Emma's head. She jerked slightly in surprise at the unexpected cold sensation. "No dramas," he lied in a casual tone. Not that there were any huge dramas at all but he didn't want to admit that he'd felt frazzled and more than a little out of his depth when trying to get Emma and himself organised without Cuddy's help.
"Here, hold this," he continued without missing a beat, holding the bag of deli sandwiches out for Cuddy to take. He then lifted his hand and wiped the drop of ice cream off Emma's head with a slow smear of his finger. As he sucked it from his fingertip, he nodded for Cuddy to lead the way out. "Want some?" he asked as she opened the door, holding his ice cream up towards her face.
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She juggled her own bag as she took the sandwiches, getting everything settled before she headed for the door. "Thanks for everything," she called back to the receptionist, holding the door for House and Emma. She shook her head at the ice cream. She was hungry but she needed to get back to her old eating habits. She wasn't pregnant anymore. She couldn't use that as an excuse to indulge her sweet tooth. At least, not until she'd eaten her lunch.
"When did Emma last eat?" she asked as they started down the sidewalk.
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"Ummm," he said as he peered down at his watch. "About an hour, hour and a half ago. Wolfed down a whole bottle like it was her last meal and cranked out a burp guys at a poker game would be proud of." He dropped a quick look down at Emma, who was still happy right where she was. She hadn't been in the pouch much. She hadn't been outside all that much either since coming home. All the stimulation was pretty new to her and keeping her occupied. House went to take another bite of his ice cream, just managing to catch another dollop that had dripped from the cone and was about to splat onto Emma's head.
The damn thing was getting too messy to eat, something that didn't matter to him usually except he had Emma strapped to his chest right now. He'd almost finished it anyway. He stopped at a trash can and tossed the remainder of the ice cream into it, licked his fingers and wiped his hands on his sides and resumed walking. Despite his sticky hand, he reached for Cuddy's and clasped it.
"How was your thing?" He nodded back in the direction of the spa.
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She was tempted to scoop Emma out of the sling but she seemed content where she was. Cuddy rolled her eyes at the sticky feel of House's hand but she didn't try to pull away.
"It was good. I feel halfway human again. You were right--I needed that." She gave his sticky hand a light squeeze as they stopped at the corner, waiting for the light to change so they could cross the street and head into the park. "The massage alone was worth any price. I didn't realize how tight my muscles had gotten."
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As they crossed the street, he glanced down at Emma squirming in the pouch, rubbing her face against his shirt with her little fists bunched up either side of her head. She let out a slightly frustrated grunt and he felt her draw her legs up. She was getting restless, perhaps tired or wanting a chance of scenery. Or perhaps hearing Cuddy's voice made her want to go to her mother.
"The car's on the way to the park, just over there." He gestured in the direction of the parking lot with their joined hands. "Gotta grab Emma's bag." He hadn't brought it with him to the spa, only having one hand to carry the sandwiches from the deli, but with Cuddy in tow now he had more hands to help him. The detour was quick; House got the bag out of the trunk and, after wiping his sticky hands clean with a baby wipe, he and Cuddy continued towards the park, which was only a couple of blocks further down.
It was a typical Saturday mid-afternoon in the park, with families and people using the most of the sunny, warm weather to have their own picnics. Other people were sprawled out on the grass, reading books or simply lying in the sun, others were lazing around while talking to each other, some kids were running around chasing each other and a number of people were walking their dogs.
"Wow, you can almost smell the happiness in the air," he remarked in a dry tone after several quiet moments of taking everything in around him, knowing Cuddy would expect him to make an observation along those lines.
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She really was feeling positive--more so than she had in a while. It wasn't that she hated being a mother--far from it. She loved Emma more than she ever thought she could love anyone. But she'd gotten bogged down with the admittedly stressful job of caring for a newborn. Getting out of the house, doing something purely for fun and not because it had to be done--it really improved her mood.
"You're not going to break out in hives, are you?" she asked dryly. "Should I grab an epipen before you have a full blown allergic reaction to all the happy?"
She gave him an affectionate nudge, then pulled him toward a shaded spot. She loved the sun but Emma's skin couldn't handle it. She'd be safer in the shade and Cuddy wouldn't have to worry about her. She got a small blanket from the diaper bag and spread it on the ground for Emma to lie on.
"Do you need help getting her out of that?" she asked, nodding at the sling.
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He couldn't help a small smile at her nudge and as she grabbed his hand, glad Cuddy seemed a lot more relaxed and calmer than she'd been for a while. Turned out he really had been right about her needing some relaxation time. Even the way she was holding herself was more relaxed than he could remember seeing in a long time. As they neared the spot Cuddy chose to settle, he dropped his hand from hers and reached up to give her right shoulder a quick, affectionate squeeze. He then turned down to Emma while Cuddy tended to the bag.
Emma's head was turned to the side, her cheek to his chest, and she was peering towards the direction of a few teenagers kicking a soccer ball around a little distance away. He gave her bottom a pat and looked over at Cuddy. He nodded and turned to her, letting Cuddy cradle Emma's body securely between them while he extracted himself from the sling straps. Once Emma was in Cuddy's arms, he gave his shoulders a quick roll to unhinge the slight knots carrying her weight around on him had caused.
"Good lord, you're already getting heavy," he complained to Emma. He lifted a hand to one shoulder and rolled it again while quickly massaging it. It was more likely he was in dire need of a massage of his own because he knew he was tight and tense. Letting his shoulder go, he dropped down onto the blanket, tossing his cane onto the grass, and pulled the deli bag to him. He unpacked it, setting out a couple of sandwiches wrapped in foil and paper, and a couple of tubs of salad. Along with a couple of plastic forks, he also laid out two bottles of Snapple, diet lemon tea for Cuddy and cranberry raspberry for himself.
House scrunched the bag up and stuffed it inside the diaper bag for now. Emma was making a few noises while being tugged out of the sling and House looked down at her as she was laid out on the rug. Immediately, she stretched out and kicked her legs. He reached over and snagged her left foot with his fingers, and he gave it a shake. "You're feeling a bit cramped? How do you think your old man feels, lugging all your body weight around with me? It's like carrying a sack of potatoes."
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"Now you know how I feel," she told House as he worked the strain out of his shoulders. "Try lugging that around in your belly for a couple months."
She sat down next to him and reached for her drink. For a few minutes she simply watched Emma stretching and looking around. The baby hadn't been outside much--usually just for quick trips to the store--and the park was full of new experiences. There were the sounds of the other people in the park, the occasional dog barking, the light breeze wafting over her tiny body. Emma looked in House's direction when he talked to her but otherwise, her eyes roamed as if trying to take it all in.
She took a long drink of her tea and sighed. "I can't remember the last time we had a nice, relaxing Saturday." Between the pregnancy and House's problems, it really had been a long time since they'd just taken a day to relax and do whatever they wanted to do.
She threw him a wry grin as she thought about House having to deal with Emma on his own all morning. "Although, I suppose my morning was more relaxing than yours."
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Emma kicked and flexed her foot in his grasp, letting out a content gurgle while her arms flailed still without much coordination. With the tip of his thumb, he lightly tickled the underside of her foot, which she jerked away from in reflex, and he glanced up at Cuddy as she spoke. He couldn't remember the last time they'd had a relaxing Saturday, either. Before Emma already seemed like a lifetime ago, even though it was only a few weeks ago. Life before Emma almost seemed like it never existed in a way because his life had been so consumed with her since she was born.
Pulling away from Emma, he sat up straight and reached for his Snapple. He shrugged as he popped the lid undone. He refused to let Cuddy know he'd gotten frazzled. "Like I said, piece of cake." He took a sip. "She ate, she played, she pooped, she napped and so did I."
Though he had felt out of his league while alone with Emma, he had managed to cope. And still being untrusting of Cuddy's assessment of his parenting, he didn't want to give her a reason to find fault. He also didn't want to give her a reason to find weakness in him, that he couldn't cope and wasn't getting better. As far as he was concerned, he'd made a lot of progress since coming out of hospital, and he was especially sensitive towards any criticism that seemed to suggest the contrary.
Recapping his drink, he put it down on the grass and reached for his sandwich. "We worked together like a team this morning, didn't we?" he said to Emma, looking down at his lunch while unwrapping it. "Dirty handprints on the wall, muddy footprints throughout the house, furniture upturned from playing indoor football, puked in the pot plants..."
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"Right," she said dryly as she unwrapped her sandwich. "Since Emma isn't mobile yet, I'll know exactly who to blame for the destruction. Next year she'll on her feet and into everything and then you might be able to get away with blaming her...but don't count on it."
She was hungry so she concentrated on eating, leaning over occasionally to talk to Emma or rub her tummy, anything to try and engage her attention. Emma seemed fairly content for the moment to simply kick and stretch, occasionally reacting to some of the louder noises around her.
Cuddy was fairly content as well to simply sit and eat her lunch. She'd deliberately not made any other plans for the day so she could enjoy their little outing for as long as they felt like it. It really had been a long time since they'd been able to do anything like this.
"Do you have anything planned for the rest of the day?" she asked House. "I mean, I got the morning off so if you wanted to go do something for yourself...."
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Emma letting out a whooping sound distracted him for a moment. He looked down at her as he drew a knee up to his chest and propped his elbow on his knee. He was honestly still fascinated with her, even a few weeks after her birth. He thought the fascination would wear off but no. He often found himself watching her, just staring absorbed in her doing little more than lying on the floor and kicking, or sometimes when she was feeding from Cuddy, or at times when he had her in his arms.
It felt like eons ago since she was born. In some ways, he'd become accustomed to her now being a part of his routine that he didn't think much about it. But he hadn't become so accustomed that he didn't have what seemed to him like out of body moments, where he was struck with the persistent thought that he was a father.
His eyes darted back up to Cuddy at her question, pulled out of his thoughts, and he shook his head while angling his sandwich to his mouth for another bite. "Nope. Nothing planned. You both got me to yourselves for the rest of the day." He paused to chew and swallow part of his mouthful. "Aren't you both lucky ladies."
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She looked down, smiling, when Emma made noise. She still wished she knew what was going on in her little mind. Objectively, Cuddy knew most of Emma's behavior was purely reflexive at this point in her development. She reacted to stimuli without any real thought. That didn't stop Cuddy from thinking there were thoughts going on and wanting to understand them.
"We're probably the luckiest ladies in the park." She was teasing him but she was also serious. Despite some rough moments, House had been doing his best to be a partner to her and a father to Emma. She might have complaints about some of the things House did but she had no complaints about the effort he'd made to be part of this family.
"Of course, I could argue that you're the lucky one," she said, still with a light teasing tone to her voice. "After all, you get to have lunch with the most beautiful little girl in the world, not to mention her red-hot mama." She let a soft snort of amusement as she took a bite of her sandwich. She didn't exactly feel 'red hot' but she was at least feeling good enough to joke about it.
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His look turned thoughtful at Cuddy's next point. He had to glance down at Emma, unable to resist against Cuddy saying she was the most beautiful girl in the world. Though his expression remained impassive, or so he thought, his heart clenched with pride. Cuddy was right. Emma was the most beautiful girl in the world. Immediately, he wanted to roll his eyes at himself. Sappiness had never been something he succumbed to... most of the time.
Luckily, Cuddy came to his rescue. He raised his eyes back to her and chose that moment to leer. "You mean MILF," he replied. He waggled his brows at her, took another swig of his drink, set it down and then abandoned his lunch for the time being and began scooting his way around to Cuddy. He shuffled in behind her, stretching his long legs out alongside hers and pressing up against her back.
Though he wasn't one for much PDA, the relaxed atmosphere of the park and the way everyone around them was occupied with their own thing made it feel that he and Cuddy were in a way on their own. He was feeling pretty relaxed himself; relaxed and playful. He and Cuddy never had much time for affection these days. He moved his arms around her middle at the same time that he pressed a nibbling kiss to the spot just behind her ear. "Red-hot mama," he agreed in a low murmur. "Mom I'd like to f--"
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She knew better than to draw attention to it, though. He'd just get embarrassed or deny it. Even with her, he still had a hard time letting his softer side show. She could deal with it; she'd certainly had experience with his emotional repression. She didn't want him to do it with Emma, though. She wanted him to get used to the idea that not only was it okay to be a softy with his daughter, it was actually preferable.
She watched him as he scooted around to her back, somewhat leery of what he had in mind. When he wrapped his arms around her, though, she smiled and relaxed back against him. Right up until she had to reach back and cover his mouth before he could finish his statement.
"Behave," she told him. She turned her head and leaned back so she could kiss him. That was a far better way for him to occupy his mouth than announcing to anyone who might be listening that he thought she was a MILF.
Emma made a low, fussy noise and Cuddy ended the kiss with a little nip at his lower lip. "See--your daughter agrees. She says you should behave and not embarrass her mother."
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And perhaps had they not been in public and Emma hadn't been right next to them, he would have taken a few more liberties with his hands instead of keeping them just on her middle. He knew she wasn't ready for sex in any yet but that didn't mean he couldn't grope and feel all the bits of her body he liked, which was all of it. Pity they were in the park.
"Hmmm," he mused, mildly disappointed the kiss had been interrupted. He turned his head down to Emma. "Give it fifteen years and she'll be begging me to rescue her from her embarrassing mother."
Emma still seemed fine for the moment. He turned back to Cuddy and studied her profile while lifting a hand to her back. He rubbed it and ran it up over the curve of her shoulder, and gave it a squeeze. "Pass me my drink?" he said, nodding in the direction of where he'd left it standing on the grass.
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She really hoped Emma would never feel so embarrassed by her parents that she truly tried to distance herself. Cuddy knew conflict was inevitable--it was practically a rite of passage for any kid. She hoped, though, that their relationship would be strong enough that they'd always enjoy mother-daughter things in between the conflicts.
She handed House his drink, then reached down to rub lightly on Emma's tummy when she fussed again. She was probably getting tired--it had been a big morning for her, too--but she wasn't overly fussy yet. She quieted when Cuddy touched her although she was rubbing her hands on her face like she did sometimes when she was tired.
Cuddy was glad Emma wasn't demanding to be held yet. It was nice to simply sit with House. Physical contact had always been a big part of their relationship. Not just sex--she wasn't even close to in the mood for that yet. But kissing, cuddling, even just sitting together like they were now--those kinds of touches had always been comforting to her. Since Emma's birth, she'd sort of gotten out of the habit of touching.
"We should try to do this every week, especially while the weather's nice," she said. "Not the spa thing but just taking a half day to get out of the house and relax."
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