Same song, gazillionth verse

[cuddlewhore22]

I don't remember who it was, but someone once commented on the fact that I rarely, if ever, write anything bad, sad, mean, forlorn, depressing, angry, or negative in my LJ. And it's true. Rarely do I vent that kind of frustration or negative emotion to any one else, especially in a forum such as this. But, for the gazillionth time, it does not mean

Comments

[duckssaymip]

I know you probably don't want people responding to this post so much, that it's probably more of a "reflection to self for others to view" kind of thing, but I guess I'm a loudmouth who needs to throw in his 2 cents. I really can't conceive of any way that someone calling you stupid or ugly is either accurate or funny. If I were you, I'd take the offender by the arm next time they said something like that, lead them to a quiet corner, and say, "Look, do you know how much of an ass you are when you say things like that? Do you think I appreciate this or something? Because if so, you have absolutely no grasp on reality." Maybe I'm just blunt, I dunno.... But while wearing every emotion on your sleeve seems a little extreme, coming out and defending yourself against absurd and baseless character assaults certainly isn't. It's definitely not about changing yourself or anything. It's about making a space for yourself to operate comfortably in dealing with others. It's your personal space, and if you feel like someone is violating it, you can defend it all you like.

Anyway, I'm probably violating some personal space or something here.... So I'm going to bed :) I'll talk to you soon!

[cuddlewhore22]

Actually Mike, when I posted that post, I thought to myself "I'll bet that Mike, if no one else, will have some advice." :) For the record, I wouldn't post it up there at all if I didn't want some comment from y'all. Thank you for thinking of me, and for your help.

As per your advice, I've been thinking about it today. I think that, although I will probably never have the nerve to take an offender by the arm or be as blunt as you, addressing the person at the time is probably the right move. I think that from now on, when someone says something that crosses the "shut the hell up" line (for some reason, I find that amusing), I'm just going to tell them so. I'm going to say "Hey, that was a little rough." And then leave it at that. At the very least, I will be able to keep some self-respect and know that I've tried to establish some sort of line. It doesn't have to be a big deal-- and I don't want it to be-- I just want it to be known that there are certain lines that shouldn't be crossed with me, or really, with anyone.

So there ya go. :) Thanks again for the advice; I always know that I can depend on you for some. Talk to you soon!

[duckssaymip]

Ahhhhh I am totally gaining the reputation of a loudmouth! hehehe Good call on the plan... I think it will work very well :)

You know, I totally filed away that "shut the hell up line" zinger in my head for future use, too. That one was damned good. Don't worry, I promise to provide a citation when I use it.... After all, I am a historian, and that's part of the job :)

[firstlight1]

What do you mean, "gaining" the reputation? *wink*