the book, the tome of birds, the repository of avian knowledge
Hey there LJ, it's been awhile. Even though I know so few people who actually post here anymore, and mostly just lurk, I still value this as a venue to look back and see a tranche d'vie from my own experiences.
As of today, I am halfway through college. Shit. I am finished with my last final. I am starting to move out. I am starting to move on. I am a junior in school, and I am still a junior in life. Yet I am the oldest and most experienced junior I've ever been. I am going to Japan on someone else's tab! I am so sick of birds. I am not a bird-watcher at heart. I am perpetually in deep admiration for the passion some people hold for birds, but a bird-watcher is not what I am. I am still not set on an academic major or a career path or a life goal. I am spreading, I am changing. I am so different from any projections I ever imagined. The older self of what I am may have felt differently, but I am so proud of what I have become. As much as I am attached to these visions and fantasies I once held, and how I could have loved to be them, I am happy for where I am. I am looking into the uncertain future. I am a brother of Sigma Chi. I am a man of good character. I am a student of fair ability, with ambitious purposes and a congenial disposition. I am possessed of good morals, with a high sense of honor and a deep sense of personal responsibility. I am more open than before, about myself and with myself and of myself. In that respect, I am duck sauce. Whenever I am aware of duck sauce, I am contemplating: is it made of ducks, or for ducks, or by ducks? I am loved. I am halfway done with college. Did I say that before? I am halfway done with college. Again: shit. I am poised to do things like never before. I am independent. I am anchored and chained, but free. I am not the one to leave an indelible swath behind with my mark of glory, the world has been here for years and I am pretty sure it can keep on turning with very little notice of what I do or who I am, but I find what matters to me and what matters to the people who matter to me. I am poised. I am standing on an edge, an edge that has always been there but now seems higher, ready to reach forward and higher and not let the haters get me down, ready to find the wonder in every moment and the love in every connection.
I am gonna play Katamari SO SOOOOOOOON.
Notice how that turned into one of those "I am" poems from 12th grade English with Corey Davis? Yeah. I just started and it made sense to keep it going. This year has been the proverbial I Am poem of my life.
A lot to digest still... a lot of crazy stories to recount and share and revere and remember from this semester. These will be coming along shortly. But for now comes the much needed chance to rest. And Deadweek! Since I'm staying until commencement day to play music with the band, I basically now have the opportunity for two weeks of shenanigans and hangouts and shmeezing with a bunch of my best friends and no real obligations.
"I expect to pass through this world but once; any good thing therefore that I can do, or any kindness that I can show to any fellow creature, let me do it now; let me not defer it or neglect it, for I shall not pass this way again.”
-Etienne De Grellet
As of today, I am halfway through college. Shit. I am finished with my last final. I am starting to move out. I am starting to move on. I am a junior in school, and I am still a junior in life. Yet I am the oldest and most experienced junior I've ever been. I am going to Japan on someone else's tab! I am so sick of birds. I am not a bird-watcher at heart. I am perpetually in deep admiration for the passion some people hold for birds, but a bird-watcher is not what I am. I am still not set on an academic major or a career path or a life goal. I am spreading, I am changing. I am so different from any projections I ever imagined. The older self of what I am may have felt differently, but I am so proud of what I have become. As much as I am attached to these visions and fantasies I once held, and how I could have loved to be them, I am happy for where I am. I am looking into the uncertain future. I am a brother of Sigma Chi. I am a man of good character. I am a student of fair ability, with ambitious purposes and a congenial disposition. I am possessed of good morals, with a high sense of honor and a deep sense of personal responsibility. I am more open than before, about myself and with myself and of myself. In that respect, I am duck sauce. Whenever I am aware of duck sauce, I am contemplating: is it made of ducks, or for ducks, or by ducks? I am loved. I am halfway done with college. Did I say that before? I am halfway done with college. Again: shit. I am poised to do things like never before. I am independent. I am anchored and chained, but free. I am not the one to leave an indelible swath behind with my mark of glory, the world has been here for years and I am pretty sure it can keep on turning with very little notice of what I do or who I am, but I find what matters to me and what matters to the people who matter to me. I am poised. I am standing on an edge, an edge that has always been there but now seems higher, ready to reach forward and higher and not let the haters get me down, ready to find the wonder in every moment and the love in every connection.
I am gonna play Katamari SO SOOOOOOOON.
Notice how that turned into one of those "I am" poems from 12th grade English with Corey Davis? Yeah. I just started and it made sense to keep it going. This year has been the proverbial I Am poem of my life.
A lot to digest still... a lot of crazy stories to recount and share and revere and remember from this semester. These will be coming along shortly. But for now comes the much needed chance to rest. And Deadweek! Since I'm staying until commencement day to play music with the band, I basically now have the opportunity for two weeks of shenanigans and hangouts and shmeezing with a bunch of my best friends and no real obligations.
"I expect to pass through this world but once; any good thing therefore that I can do, or any kindness that I can show to any fellow creature, let me do it now; let me not defer it or neglect it, for I shall not pass this way again.”
-Etienne De Grellet