(no subject)
you know what smacked me in the face recently? i dont have a group, or a best friend, or any especial preference to a small number of people. i never have a problem finding shit to do or people to hang out with, hell, there are too many now that i have like two days a week to leave my house, but it's been since around summer since i've called the same people every day. it's pretty cool when im happy and everyone else is happy and it like always seeing someone you miss for the first time in forever, but then i think i've run out of anything of importance to say, it's kinda hypocritical to be writing now, and when everything's not great there's nothing to say and i might as well be gone. it's a tough call....not having to worry about all that shit that goes on when you're close to people, or not feeling like there's anyone you can go to when you feel like crap. a case of not being close enough to anyone to not feel like an awkward bastard talking about problems. the worst part is just that i always feel like im tagging along with people. take the back seat while they gossip up front, but the music's so loud you're on your own anyways.
i dunno, i dont care that much. it's kind of a mess but i'll either turn back to being socially functioning or not. que sera sera. i just remembered that song, and people singing it in 5th grade. you know, briefly, last weekend, after something jackie said to me, i thought all those ideas were misconceptions and that i could look at things differently from then on, but somehow it didn't happen.
i applied to three colleges today. er, yesterday, i might have already said so. i dotn even remember, but i got rid of the envelopes today, so that's that.
i dunno, i dont care that much. it's kind of a mess but i'll either turn back to being socially functioning or not. que sera sera. i just remembered that song, and people singing it in 5th grade. you know, briefly, last weekend, after something jackie said to me, i thought all those ideas were misconceptions and that i could look at things differently from then on, but somehow it didn't happen.
i applied to three colleges today. er, yesterday, i might have already said so. i dotn even remember, but i got rid of the envelopes today, so that's that.