FIC: Gonna Go When The Volcano Blows (Part One)
TITLE: Gonna Go When The Volcano Blows (Part One) RATING: M
PAIRING: Arthur/Eames
SUMMARY: In which Arthur has a revelation and dream-thieving is a lot like raiding.
A/N: This bridges the gap between Anal [ Inception] and the third part, What A Long, Strange Trip It's Been. Primer for all the WoW jargon can be found here. There are a couple of references in this to the Hallow's Eve drabble, which can also be found here.
[Battleground][Pickles-Frostmourne]: theressss the wsg prom king and queen!
“Dibs on king,” Arthur says.
It’s another job, another hotel room, another double bed and no coffee table. Eames elbows him, hard.
[Battleground][Lololbubble-Frostmourne]: dibs on king
[Battleground][Outofammo-Frostmourne]: jsyak. i called dibs first
1 IF YOU THINK THE QUEEN SHOULD GET THE KING A BEER
The string of numbers roll past in the chat window. “You are such an asshole,” Arthur says, setting his laptop aside and swinging his legs over the side of the bed. “And 42 isn’t a valid vote. It doesn’t even have a one in it.”
“Being numerically challenged doesn’t mean your vote doesn’t count,” Eames is typing as he talks, probably handing out the raid warnings for the newbies. They’re running randoms without their regular core team, so there are plenty of them. “Besides, maybe he just meant that you getting me a beer is the answer to the meaning of life, the universe, and everything.”
“Maybe he just meant that I’m mostly harmless,” Arthur hands him the open bottle, setting his own down on the bedside table.
“Is that a threat? I fear I might descend into a long, dark, tea-time of the soul if it is.”
Arthur rolls his eyes, and Eames laughs. It’s a genuine sound, and he realises that he’d never actually heard Eames do it until they started... well. Whatever this was.
[Battleground][Outofammo-Frostmourne]: remind me to never try to out-douglas adams a brit ever again
COMBAT IN 30 BUFFS AND FLASKS
[Battleground][Lariat-Barthilas]: i dont have fort
[Battleground][Scartissue-Dreadmaul]: got a lock, fort doesnt stack with the imp anymore
In the last few seconds before the gates fall, Arthur gets out his little fawn. It’s an extra challenge trying to keep it alive through all the splash damage, especially with all the random pugs ruining the chance of a completely clean win.
They’re two-one in favour of the Alliance within fifteen minutes, and the loud takkatakka of Eames hitting the keys is stark in contrast to Arthur’s measured taps.
SO THERES THIS THING WHERE YOU **DONT FIGHT IN THE MIDDLE**
“So,” Arthur says casually. “Apparently you’re meant to stay out of the middle.”
Eames kicks his foot. “Head down to the lower tunnel. I’ll try to get it through.”
GET OUT OF THE MIDDLE. NO SRSLY OUT. OF. THE. FUCKIING. MIDDLE.
“This isn’t going to happen,” Arthur says, watching the melee and casters fighting in the centre of the field.
[Battleground][Sombrero-Silver Hand]: god shut up
[Battleground][Sombrero-Silver Hand]: nobody caqres
[Battleground][Pickles-Frostmourne]: some of us actually want to get points jsyfk
[Battleground][Moocowmeat-Barthilas]: ):<
He sits his toon down in front of the lower tunnel entrance.
Outofammo waits.
Eames sighs and pops his bubble to get through the pack fighting in the middle relatively unscathed before sitting down at the tunnel entrance too.
Lololbubble goes to sleep.
Arthur stretches his hands as the Allies cap the final flag and nudges Eames with his shoulder. “Another beer?”
“I need one.”
Usually if he hits a losing streak, Arthur will quit while he’s ahead rather than waste a night feeling like he’s failing. But it’s three a.m and they’ve only just logged off, laughing just a little tipsy on the balcony and lighting each other’s cigarettes like they’re the kings of all Azeroth despite only winning five matches the entire night.
Arthur leans back against the doorframe and watches Eames flick glowing embers over the edge of the balcony, elbows resting on the railing. “I should care more about wiping all night,” he says, eyes following the lines of Eames’s arm as he raises the cigarette back to his lips.
The laugh is accompanied by curling smoke. “Arthur, I’d wipe all week with you.”
They don’t, of course. But it’s the thought that counts.
*
Arthur likes consistency. He likes the way two plus two always equals four and the way he can always predict to the second when the next hard beat in Non je ne regrette rien is. It’s probably part of the reason he likes playing WoW so much, really; because DPS THE
always means the same thing no matter what language you’re speaking and the offtank should always taunt at eight stacks on Festergut.
SO I KNOW I SAID WE WERE KILLING THE DRAKES
I CHANGED MY MIND REPOSITION FOR A ZERG
The only consistent thing about Eames is that he will be there. And Arthur’s finding he’s surprisingly okay with that.
[Raid][Strumpet]: do we even have the dps for that?
[Raid][Lololbubble]: we have a huntr n a rogue both pulling 9k +, so long as evryone else is at least avg yes
[Lololbubble] whispers: i got ur mail when wud u need me in tasmania?
[Raid][Chomper]: 2.5 mill hp, 75 seconds till he goes immune when shadron lands, so
[Raid][Chomper]: uh
To [Lololbubble]: can we talk about it after this please
[Raid][Outofammo]: it’s 5.5k dps each we’ve got it easy just don’t stand in the fucking flame waves
[Lololbubble] whispers: i rly have to run right after
[Lololbubble] whispers: think i got tailed
[Raid][Outofammo]: so everyone come back and mount up near the portal, i’ll feign pull, then we all run in to the usual positions
To [Lololbubble]: wtf are you even doing here then
To [Lololbubble]: if you get killed because you were raiding i swear to god
[Lololbubble] whispers: haha ive got it under control and u know it. but i’d never stand u up for a raid
READY CHECKING
ONLY HIT YES IF YOU ARE FLASKED AND MOUNTED AND KNOW WHERE YOU ARE MEANT TO BE
[Lololbubble] whispers: so. tasmania
To [Lololbubble]: legal job. nothing we haven’t done before. if you can be in launceston by the 29th
[Lololbubble] whispers: course i can
[Lololbubble] whispers: i’d never stand u up for anything, tbh
[Raid][Lololbubble]: pull when ready
Arthur switches his attention from the conversation to the task at hand, flexing his fingers before running in to the middle of the platform where the black dragon stands to start the combat.
Unsurprisingly, Sartharion goes down in exactly sixty-two seconds.
[Raid][Lololbubble]: pst ammo if u want any of the gear gonna assmue nobody needs it
[Lololbubble] whispers: realy gotta run see u in lanceuston
Lololbubble has gone offline.
[Eeeee Eames] has gone offline.
To [Lololbubble]: gdi eames
No player called [Lololbubble] currently online.
*
These days when they work together, Eames will show up sometime after dinner with beer and a smartass comment about losing fifty dkp. It’s become a ritual; they clean up on a job, Eames brings booze, together they make the Alliance rue the day they rolled blue.
But he’s alone tonight, and he’s wishing he’d thought to stop at the liquor store himself as he lies on his stomach on the bed, letting his pet tank Bloodsail pirates while he tabs in and out of the game window to read blogs.
[Lololbubble] whispers: i bet i can gess what ure doing down there
The whisper takes him a little bit by surprise when he tabs back in to loot after a particularly long article.
To [Lololbubble]: i dont doubt it
To [Lololbubble]: hows that airport wireless?
[Lololbubble] whispers: wudnt pvp on it
To [Lololbubble]: pity
[Lololbubble] whispers: good enuogh for this tho
The paladin aoe cuts through the mobs faster than the hunter can, but it doesn’t take long before they have a nice optimal circuit of the bay going.
[Lololbubble] whispers: wat would u do if i got one but vendored it
To [Lololbubble]: id be very careful what you say about vendoring macaws to people who know at least 85% of your aliases and where you live on most continents
[Lololbubble] whispers: only 85%?
[Lololbubble] whispers: im flattered
To [Lololbubble]: you should be
One hundred and eighty-nine dead pirates later, Arthur sees the paladin popping his hearthstone.
[Lololbubble] whispers: gtg. boarding call
Lololbubble blows Outofammo a kiss.
He only kills another dozen pirates after Eames logs off. There’s a dissatisfied feeling gnawing at his stomach as he packs up for the night, despite how well the job went, and he’s asleep not long after his head hits the pillow.
He doesn’t dream.
*
“I think we should start a guild.”
Arthur looks up from the newspaper. They’re sharing space on this job, a twin room with an excellent view and a table big enough for both their computers. Eames tilts his head in the bathroom doorway, hair standing up in wet spikes and towel riding far too low on his hips.
“A guild,” Arthur repeats slowly.
“You know. A friendly group of people who have the same little tag over their heads and-“
“Sure,” he interrupts, most of his attention back on the paper. “But I’m not doing it.”
Eames sits down with a glass of juice and a croissant, reaching across to tug the finance section out of the paper. Arthur lets him. “You’d join though.”
“I suppose so.”
“And possibly run the guild bank. And raids. And help screen the recruits.”
He’s chewing on the corner of the croissant when Arthur looks up again. “You think I have time for that?”
Eames shrugs. “I’d help.”
The cartoons in the Canadian paper are really subpar. “Show me a signed charter, then maybe we’ll talk,” he says.
He’s too distracted to see the way Eames grins.
*
Eames to Arthur
u should log on
Arthur to Eames
got a drop to make tonight. won’t be done till late
Eames to Arthur
i can wait. u still coming to ny 2morrow
Arthur to Eames
ok. and yeah i am
*
ONWARDS TO PART TWO