(no subject)
Wow.. I can't believe I'm writing in this thing..I havnt been on this site since like what... april??
anyway.. Im really bored right now so i'm gonna be lame and waste my time on this stupid thing. haha
So much has happened in the past couple of months. well maybe not too much.. but some things happened, like i moved out for a couple of months, loved it, then realized i was broke, never saw anyone anymore, and then as a result my car got smashed up by some asshole..yeah some douchebag pretty much took a baseball bat to my car for no reason.. thats because i lived in the ghetto.. but not really? haha.. but yeah anyway.. I've notice how my relationships have changed with people over the summer too.. I've notcied ive grown apart from many people..even best friends.. I'm really gonna stick to my opinion or fact that i'm not the one that changed though.. cus i havnt.. i'm still the dorky nice push over that everyone loves to fuck over in the end.. haha.. but I dont know.. because of how I've noticed people are lately I just dont hang out with anyone anymore.. or even make an attempt to stay in contact with people..and there is only so much I cna even take of certain people..Sometimes I feel like i'm the fucked up one, maybe i'm just subconciously scared that i cant really trust anybody.. who really knows..
If anything can really describe how I feel..I feel like a robot. thats all. just emotionless.. everyday its the same thing... work all the time, sleep.. occasionally hang out with dan for some comic relief and to just laugh at my life and my situations instead of over analyzing them and getting bummed out..I dont know if this is a good thing to feel "numb" to alot of things.. but i guess it beats being depressed. I dunno.. I need to figure shit out I guess.. all I know is this summer sucked..and I miss last summer alot..I did some stupid stuff last summer.. but I was being an 18 year old and having fun..and meeting new people.. now I tell everyone to fuck off..I wish i could rewind to last summer, do it all over again, even the bad moments, and meet him for the first time, and relive every moment we hung out together, cus i miss hanging out with him..and i havnt seen him in over a month or even talked to him that much lately.. it sucks..im waiting for a big turn around i guess...or somehting good to happen.. anything
well, i'm done complaining for one night.
i'll update the next time something good and exciting happens to break this vicious cycle of hopelessness.
<3.. Still waiting for the sun.. <3
anyway.. Im really bored right now so i'm gonna be lame and waste my time on this stupid thing. haha
So much has happened in the past couple of months. well maybe not too much.. but some things happened, like i moved out for a couple of months, loved it, then realized i was broke, never saw anyone anymore, and then as a result my car got smashed up by some asshole..yeah some douchebag pretty much took a baseball bat to my car for no reason.. thats because i lived in the ghetto.. but not really? haha.. but yeah anyway.. I've notice how my relationships have changed with people over the summer too.. I've notcied ive grown apart from many people..even best friends.. I'm really gonna stick to my opinion or fact that i'm not the one that changed though.. cus i havnt.. i'm still the dorky nice push over that everyone loves to fuck over in the end.. haha.. but I dont know.. because of how I've noticed people are lately I just dont hang out with anyone anymore.. or even make an attempt to stay in contact with people..and there is only so much I cna even take of certain people..Sometimes I feel like i'm the fucked up one, maybe i'm just subconciously scared that i cant really trust anybody.. who really knows..
If anything can really describe how I feel..I feel like a robot. thats all. just emotionless.. everyday its the same thing... work all the time, sleep.. occasionally hang out with dan for some comic relief and to just laugh at my life and my situations instead of over analyzing them and getting bummed out..I dont know if this is a good thing to feel "numb" to alot of things.. but i guess it beats being depressed. I dunno.. I need to figure shit out I guess.. all I know is this summer sucked..and I miss last summer alot..I did some stupid stuff last summer.. but I was being an 18 year old and having fun..and meeting new people.. now I tell everyone to fuck off..I wish i could rewind to last summer, do it all over again, even the bad moments, and meet him for the first time, and relive every moment we hung out together, cus i miss hanging out with him..and i havnt seen him in over a month or even talked to him that much lately.. it sucks..im waiting for a big turn around i guess...or somehting good to happen.. anything
well, i'm done complaining for one night.
i'll update the next time something good and exciting happens to break this vicious cycle of hopelessness.
<3.. Still waiting for the sun.. <3