(no subject)
There's a lot in my head today, and none of it is coming out very well. I feel like my brain is running around in tight little circles today - frantic. Not to worry anyone, but I think I'm approaching my saturation point lately. I feel ready to run.
The funny thing is, nothing is bad. Oh, we're pretty tight here, moneywise. There's not a lot to be had, and large bills to pay all the time. A couple of fairly forceful requests for payments. It never seems to end. But, there is also enough money coming in to pay them, and everyone gets something. So, that's not bad. S&D is taking up lots of my time, which is a good thing, if stressful. Bond is . . .well, he's two, and all the good and bad things that come along with being two. Paul is being so supportive of this business venture, and so loving about helping me with ideas, it's amazing. I have friends, too. Real friends, who can listen to me bitch and watch me lose my temper with them and then forgive me and come back for more.
My life is good. Why am I so afraid? Why do I feel like crying so much lately? I don't understand, and I'm tired. I just want it to stop. It's these times that disappearing seems like a viable option to me. I can't, I won't . . .but I want to.
The funny thing is, nothing is bad. Oh, we're pretty tight here, moneywise. There's not a lot to be had, and large bills to pay all the time. A couple of fairly forceful requests for payments. It never seems to end. But, there is also enough money coming in to pay them, and everyone gets something. So, that's not bad. S&D is taking up lots of my time, which is a good thing, if stressful. Bond is . . .well, he's two, and all the good and bad things that come along with being two. Paul is being so supportive of this business venture, and so loving about helping me with ideas, it's amazing. I have friends, too. Real friends, who can listen to me bitch and watch me lose my temper with them and then forgive me and come back for more.
My life is good. Why am I so afraid? Why do I feel like crying so much lately? I don't understand, and I'm tired. I just want it to stop. It's these times that disappearing seems like a viable option to me. I can't, I won't . . .but I want to.