Fanfic: H/C: Sorrows Equilibrium
(sigh, fanfiction.net is not being cooperative. oh well, there's lj!)
TITLE: SORROWS EQUILIBRIUM Calleigh Duquesne: Let me ease the pain
AUTHOR: wyntersun a.k.a csi_miamie126
SUMMARY: During the last few scenes in Lost Son , Calleigh Duquesne contemplates on what happened and what she sees in front of her. She gives comfort to the one she loves, hoping to ease the pain.
DISCLAIMER: I do not own CSI: Miami, it's characters, nor it's death scenes. All of which belong to Jerry B. The plot though, is mine.
A/N: I haven't watched Lost Son in full detail (since it's only season 2 I am watching), so I just based this fic with what I saw in www.evidenceofthingsunseen.org. *blows nose* I hate it when characters die, especially good Speed... So here's the fic where I toast to his character and to my ship. I think it's obvious that this story is H/C, so if you don't like the ships, please don't read. I don't enjoy flamers nor would I entertain them.
SORROWS EQUILIBRIUM:
Calleigh Duquesne: Let me ease the pain
You come inside my realm, in order to give me evidence. My heart hoped that you were some way or another, your usual self, yet it seemed that all of it went in vain. You talk to me, and tell me in your usual fashion that I must give you a full report on what happened. My mind tells my voice to deliver you what I have learned from years of studying and experience, yet my heart wants to tell you…
Everything will be all right.
Yet you walked away, different from what I usually see. A different man…
And I analyze the evidence, in hope that what I could give you can somewhat ease the pain you feel inside. My mind is focused on my job, yet my heart has temporarily moved away, in hope that even though we are apart, you are somehow in your usual composure. And when the evidence showed me what happened, it also said to me, "This would only make him feel sad…" Within the walls of the room, I wished that I could change this evidence, so that the sadness that you fell won't etch a deeper wound that was already there. Yet this was my job, and you specifically told me to do so.
The moment I saw you in that crime scene, I saw a different Horatio Caine. The crestfallen image of an officer, who could not believe what had happened. While investigating, we exchange the usual forensic terms, yet somehow, I cannot shake the feeling that what we were talking about back then was momentarily incomprehensible to you. All you could think about was what happened to Tim Speedle.
I know what you feel. Do not tell me that you and I are different, and that I have absolutely no idea what you felt. We are one and the same; the same profession, the same skills… We also care for the same person. Don't think that my concern for Timothy Speedle is not in the same level as yours. Speed was, is, also our brother, my brother. He is someone who has become close to me and dear to my heart.
I know what you feel. Seeing a comrade, a friend, fall down in front of your eyes, and not to be able to do a single thing, I understand that. I can put myself in your shoes; someone who is considered to be of great status yet wasn't able to protect a person. Trust me, believe me… I know…
I see you in the dark hallway; contemplating, perhaps, reminiscing. Yet it seems that slowly, you will yourself to be in that dark hallway, and in a matter of time, you will reside in that dark place, never to be seen or heard from again.
I want to save you… To free you from your bondage.
I enter that dark realm, and hand you my report. You still talk in your old fashion, yet your eyes express a sorrow that I have never seen before. Slowly, my eyes saw a different you; a person who would do everything for the sake of what he cares for in his life. Even though it means risking what he has, all for the sake of what he cares for. A person, who's fragile nature blooms when what he cares for slowly slips away, and eventually, an unexpected event cruelly takes it away from him. A person, nonetheless, a human person, with feelings, which refuse to show to others, yet when in splendid isolation, releases itself into a vast, unknowing world. But even though these changes of yours slowly appear, for me, you are still one and the same. You are still… The man I loved.
And when I saw you alongside your fragile nature, all I wanted to do was to hold you close to me; my heart to your heart, my life to your life. I wanted you to feel our heartbeats merging together as one. And in selfishness, I wanted us to be alone, and to have enough time, so that I can pull you away from your reverie and put you back together.
Perhaps you had another reason, but you held out your hands to me. Men have long thought that giving in to emotions was a sign of weakness, yet for me, this was the sign of your remaining and regaining strength. I hold you close to me, for my sense tells me that I can help rebuild your strength, if I could be with you, even for a few moments. And the longer you were close to me, I tell myself, that soon, mi querido, you will be all right.
When I thought that everything was all slowly turning out to be fine, I saw you fall to your knees and cry. " Stop please… Make it stop…" you murmur between the cries. All these events have made you suffer, and I know you cannot bear it anymore. The tears make their marks on the floor; signs of a human being that Miami thought was invincible, yet it still was a human with emotions. Tears that make you complete, tears that make you Horatio Caine; a person who does not neglect sorrow and instead embraces it and recognizes it. I wipe away those tears, to tell you that I am here, with you, forever.
"I don't want to lose you Calleigh,.." I hear you say.
These simple thoughts of yours told me that you are slowly returning to your usual self, and to me. I replied softly, to make you feel stronger, "You wont lose me Horatio… Not now… Not ever…" You gentle hands brush slowly against my hair, as I held you closer to me than ever before. Yes Horatio, I will be with you forever, don't you fear. For I believe that as long as we are together, we can face everything that this cruel world could offer us.
Hold me close, hold me close to you…
I will never go away…
I will be with you forever, mi querido.
Wyntersun a.k.a csi_miamie126
(Because someone in livejournal was belting out anger at me, saying I stole a fanfic. I just wanted to clear out my many pseudonyms. J)
TITLE: SORROWS EQUILIBRIUM Calleigh Duquesne: Let me ease the pain
AUTHOR: wyntersun a.k.a csi_miamie126
SUMMARY: During the last few scenes in Lost Son , Calleigh Duquesne contemplates on what happened and what she sees in front of her. She gives comfort to the one she loves, hoping to ease the pain.
DISCLAIMER: I do not own CSI: Miami, it's characters, nor it's death scenes. All of which belong to Jerry B. The plot though, is mine.
A/N: I haven't watched Lost Son in full detail (since it's only season 2 I am watching), so I just based this fic with what I saw in www.evidenceofthingsunseen.org. *blows nose* I hate it when characters die, especially good Speed... So here's the fic where I toast to his character and to my ship. I think it's obvious that this story is H/C, so if you don't like the ships, please don't read. I don't enjoy flamers nor would I entertain them.
SORROWS EQUILIBRIUM:
Calleigh Duquesne: Let me ease the pain
You come inside my realm, in order to give me evidence. My heart hoped that you were some way or another, your usual self, yet it seemed that all of it went in vain. You talk to me, and tell me in your usual fashion that I must give you a full report on what happened. My mind tells my voice to deliver you what I have learned from years of studying and experience, yet my heart wants to tell you…
Everything will be all right.
Yet you walked away, different from what I usually see. A different man…
And I analyze the evidence, in hope that what I could give you can somewhat ease the pain you feel inside. My mind is focused on my job, yet my heart has temporarily moved away, in hope that even though we are apart, you are somehow in your usual composure. And when the evidence showed me what happened, it also said to me, "This would only make him feel sad…" Within the walls of the room, I wished that I could change this evidence, so that the sadness that you fell won't etch a deeper wound that was already there. Yet this was my job, and you specifically told me to do so.
The moment I saw you in that crime scene, I saw a different Horatio Caine. The crestfallen image of an officer, who could not believe what had happened. While investigating, we exchange the usual forensic terms, yet somehow, I cannot shake the feeling that what we were talking about back then was momentarily incomprehensible to you. All you could think about was what happened to Tim Speedle.
I know what you feel. Do not tell me that you and I are different, and that I have absolutely no idea what you felt. We are one and the same; the same profession, the same skills… We also care for the same person. Don't think that my concern for Timothy Speedle is not in the same level as yours. Speed was, is, also our brother, my brother. He is someone who has become close to me and dear to my heart.
I know what you feel. Seeing a comrade, a friend, fall down in front of your eyes, and not to be able to do a single thing, I understand that. I can put myself in your shoes; someone who is considered to be of great status yet wasn't able to protect a person. Trust me, believe me… I know…
I see you in the dark hallway; contemplating, perhaps, reminiscing. Yet it seems that slowly, you will yourself to be in that dark hallway, and in a matter of time, you will reside in that dark place, never to be seen or heard from again.
I want to save you… To free you from your bondage.
I enter that dark realm, and hand you my report. You still talk in your old fashion, yet your eyes express a sorrow that I have never seen before. Slowly, my eyes saw a different you; a person who would do everything for the sake of what he cares for in his life. Even though it means risking what he has, all for the sake of what he cares for. A person, who's fragile nature blooms when what he cares for slowly slips away, and eventually, an unexpected event cruelly takes it away from him. A person, nonetheless, a human person, with feelings, which refuse to show to others, yet when in splendid isolation, releases itself into a vast, unknowing world. But even though these changes of yours slowly appear, for me, you are still one and the same. You are still… The man I loved.
And when I saw you alongside your fragile nature, all I wanted to do was to hold you close to me; my heart to your heart, my life to your life. I wanted you to feel our heartbeats merging together as one. And in selfishness, I wanted us to be alone, and to have enough time, so that I can pull you away from your reverie and put you back together.
Perhaps you had another reason, but you held out your hands to me. Men have long thought that giving in to emotions was a sign of weakness, yet for me, this was the sign of your remaining and regaining strength. I hold you close to me, for my sense tells me that I can help rebuild your strength, if I could be with you, even for a few moments. And the longer you were close to me, I tell myself, that soon, mi querido, you will be all right.
When I thought that everything was all slowly turning out to be fine, I saw you fall to your knees and cry. " Stop please… Make it stop…" you murmur between the cries. All these events have made you suffer, and I know you cannot bear it anymore. The tears make their marks on the floor; signs of a human being that Miami thought was invincible, yet it still was a human with emotions. Tears that make you complete, tears that make you Horatio Caine; a person who does not neglect sorrow and instead embraces it and recognizes it. I wipe away those tears, to tell you that I am here, with you, forever.
"I don't want to lose you Calleigh,.." I hear you say.
These simple thoughts of yours told me that you are slowly returning to your usual self, and to me. I replied softly, to make you feel stronger, "You wont lose me Horatio… Not now… Not ever…" You gentle hands brush slowly against my hair, as I held you closer to me than ever before. Yes Horatio, I will be with you forever, don't you fear. For I believe that as long as we are together, we can face everything that this cruel world could offer us.
Hold me close, hold me close to you…
I will never go away…
I will be with you forever, mi querido.
Wyntersun a.k.a csi_miamie126
(Because someone in livejournal was belting out anger at me, saying I stole a fanfic. I just wanted to clear out my many pseudonyms. J)