Bad Attitudes... and Bad Germs
So lately it's been pointed out to me that I have a bad attitude. I guess I do because I take the world on my shoulders and I don't really know how to ask for help. It doesn't hurt that I feel that while I am listened to my point is completely missed.
I know I am super stressed, but I don't know how to take a break. One of the reasons I fell in love with Paul is because I could just hang out and relax. I have never been good at getting out of my house/room and that wouldn't bother me so much if I didn't have so much going on right now. I don't like doing a whole lot by myself, but with everyone's schedules it seems impossible to get much done, especially on a spur of the moment when I need it.
On another note I just got back from Illinois...my grandma is dying of cancer and everyone is just preparing for her to go. I am so glad I got to go, and I think it lifted her spirit a lot to meet Anthony. Talks with family really helped me, I realized my mom is really crazy, its not just me and I need to do more for myself... not the reading during naptime/getting on the computer kind of for myself. More like the getting the pedicure I have promised myself for a year and the fried ice cream I promised myself for my birthday.
Somehow I always plan things for myself when we have "more money" but when exactly will that be? Sometimes you just gotta splurge on things so that you will have them... like enough work pants, and good shoes, because it is just a little bit more stressful when you don't. I have a little too much of my miserly grandfather in me on that one.
So for my birthday I resolve to try to get out more and relax.
I know I am super stressed, but I don't know how to take a break. One of the reasons I fell in love with Paul is because I could just hang out and relax. I have never been good at getting out of my house/room and that wouldn't bother me so much if I didn't have so much going on right now. I don't like doing a whole lot by myself, but with everyone's schedules it seems impossible to get much done, especially on a spur of the moment when I need it.
On another note I just got back from Illinois...my grandma is dying of cancer and everyone is just preparing for her to go. I am so glad I got to go, and I think it lifted her spirit a lot to meet Anthony. Talks with family really helped me, I realized my mom is really crazy, its not just me and I need to do more for myself... not the reading during naptime/getting on the computer kind of for myself. More like the getting the pedicure I have promised myself for a year and the fried ice cream I promised myself for my birthday.
Somehow I always plan things for myself when we have "more money" but when exactly will that be? Sometimes you just gotta splurge on things so that you will have them... like enough work pants, and good shoes, because it is just a little bit more stressful when you don't. I have a little too much of my miserly grandfather in me on that one.
So for my birthday I resolve to try to get out more and relax.