(no subject)
so, bored on monday night stephanie and i decided to go to bed, bath and beyond and look around and then were planning on going to target in hopes that we would see someone that works there and talk to that person and see how a recent trip went. we got to the parking lot, saw that person's car was not there but decided to go in anyways. so we went inside talked to some poeple that worked there and then went walking around the store. we got around to where electronics and books are when i saw abby, a girl that i worked with. i stopped and talked to her for a few minutes. and then went about my night. i woke up yesterday just like any other day and went to work. did normal work things until my manager, paul, came from the back of the restaurant with a funny look on his face. he said that something happened and it was going to effect everyone at work. melissa, another girl at work, tried to get him to tell her what was going on, they went to the back to smoke and when she came back up she had a weird look on her face just like paul. i asked her what he said and she said she would tell me later. so i went on with my work and heard people talking. abby died in a one-car accident that may or may not have been alcohol related. abby, the girl that after a bad experience refused to drive anywhere after she'd known she'd had too much to drink. abby, the girl that i had just seen the night before at target. abby, the girl that i never saw in a bad mood, the girl that was kind almost to a fault, the girl that i looked forward to seeing all weekend when i went to work. abby, the girl that i've only known for 2 and a half months but suddenly feel a weird connection to now that she is gone.
it is quite possible that i'm the last person from work to see her alive. and like stephanie said yesterday, it's almost like we were meant to go into target. like i was supposed to see her one last time.
so now i can't help but be sad. i mean it's only natural right? but is it possible that i'm taking it too hard? i couldn't sleep last night. and when i did sleep i would dream about people drinking or car accidents.
i know that life will go on and it's just a matter of time. i just can't help but wonder if maybe the reason i'm taking this so hard is because i'm not sure that i've ever fully gotten over my dad's death even though it's been almost 6 years.
so, uhh... yea... i'm not sure what exactly is going on in this head of mine but i can't stop thinking about things and yesterday i sent stephanie and my sisters a text message telling them that i love them no matter what happens. and stephanie replied telling me that she loved me too but neither of us are going anywhere anytime soon. however, isn't this car accident perfect proof that it's really impossible to say that?
it is quite possible that i'm the last person from work to see her alive. and like stephanie said yesterday, it's almost like we were meant to go into target. like i was supposed to see her one last time.
so now i can't help but be sad. i mean it's only natural right? but is it possible that i'm taking it too hard? i couldn't sleep last night. and when i did sleep i would dream about people drinking or car accidents.
i know that life will go on and it's just a matter of time. i just can't help but wonder if maybe the reason i'm taking this so hard is because i'm not sure that i've ever fully gotten over my dad's death even though it's been almost 6 years.
so, uhh... yea... i'm not sure what exactly is going on in this head of mine but i can't stop thinking about things and yesterday i sent stephanie and my sisters a text message telling them that i love them no matter what happens. and stephanie replied telling me that she loved me too but neither of us are going anywhere anytime soon. however, isn't this car accident perfect proof that it's really impossible to say that?