(no subject)
Today wasn't the best day. In fact it was a pretty bad day. Friday, December 17th, started well and it seemed to be a very promising day. I highly enjoyed many things that took place during the day. Then the sun went down promising nighttime and with it a much anticipated Sound party that was to take place at my house. *Things do not always go through as we want them to*. There is no specific event that occurred during the night that I can say made it a bad night. In fact there are a multitude of things that have occurred in the last few weeks that contribute to what I am feeling right now. That feeling is called loneliness. I know I am loved, but to really feel loved a person has to feel it. Love is action and lately I haven't felt loved by my "friends". I'm sorry if anyone who is reading this is offended, thinking that they love me and how dare I accuse them of not being there for me. I am sorry for being selfish right now.
but right now my heart aches.
I don't know how to say it honestly without being completely vulnerable. So I choose to be vulnerable
...and I don't know what to do. I am usually a brave person who handles things with a forced yet natural brave smile. I may complain a little but the way i see it, who right now would I complain to. I'm sitting by myself in front of a screen that can in no way console me.
I hope tomorrow turns out to be a better day.
and If you could, could you love me.
I don't like how my heart aches.
but right now my heart aches.
I don't know how to say it honestly without being completely vulnerable. So I choose to be vulnerable
...and I don't know what to do. I am usually a brave person who handles things with a forced yet natural brave smile. I may complain a little but the way i see it, who right now would I complain to. I'm sitting by myself in front of a screen that can in no way console me.
I hope tomorrow turns out to be a better day.
and If you could, could you love me.
I don't like how my heart aches.