operating a computer without a mouse
ugh. my mouse is dying. meaning the batteries are dying. life sucks right now. and it will. for the rest of my time being living here. i had a furious crying fit last night. it was so horrible. i dont think ive ever known sadness like i do now, lately. its ubearable and i mean it. i mean every word of this. it was hard to breathe..i tried to not try to breathe because i might as well have just died there, its not like i have any motivation to get up in the morning anyway. except literally, this morning i didnt get out of bed. i honestly have no reason to. my mom came in at 6:30 [about 10 minutes before the bus comes] and told me to get up. fuck. i really cried myself to sleep..i dont even remember stopping my crying last night. it hurts too much..why go on?
so todayi brought in pictures from kirstens party. 92659 people asked to look at them and almost every single one pointed out that kirsten was really pretty or that she has nice eyes or nice hair and every girl [no lie] pointed out that chris was really cute. or they just said hot. i was just like "*sigh*..yeah..yeaah..:(" and i told most of them my story and they all said "aw" i think i made them guilty for living in winchendon after realizing it ruined my life. entirely. nicole kirsten amber and vanjis picture with their shirts up was a hot shot too, people pointed out. it was so hilarious hearing three or four or seven times today "theyre so skinny!" haha. theyres all fat here. thats kind of a lie..but theres a lot of fat people. people numerously asked if vanji or nicole was me. i laughed. ha. as if i have their bodies. but their faces are partially cut off and thats probably the only reason why they might have thought it was me. so yeah. chris is such a hottie. and everyone here is jealous of me because theyve never seen true beauty.
tomorrow and thursday are half days for me. yay? babysitting...my favorite...
:( :( :(
dont make me feel better. it wont work.
ill never be better.
so todayi brought in pictures from kirstens party. 92659 people asked to look at them and almost every single one pointed out that kirsten was really pretty or that she has nice eyes or nice hair and every girl [no lie] pointed out that chris was really cute. or they just said hot. i was just like "*sigh*..yeah..yeaah..:(" and i told most of them my story and they all said "aw" i think i made them guilty for living in winchendon after realizing it ruined my life. entirely. nicole kirsten amber and vanjis picture with their shirts up was a hot shot too, people pointed out. it was so hilarious hearing three or four or seven times today "theyre so skinny!" haha. theyres all fat here. thats kind of a lie..but theres a lot of fat people. people numerously asked if vanji or nicole was me. i laughed. ha. as if i have their bodies. but their faces are partially cut off and thats probably the only reason why they might have thought it was me. so yeah. chris is such a hottie. and everyone here is jealous of me because theyve never seen true beauty.
tomorrow and thursday are half days for me. yay? babysitting...my favorite...
:( :( :(
dont make me feel better. it wont work.
ill never be better.