(no subject)
Just today i'm starting to feel and order return to my life again. It's fragile, but it's fluttering with more strength and determination.
It's moment's like this when i realise, well i think, that fear of the future comes only when you have the expectation of it to be something. It's fear that those expectations won't be met - those projections others have put out there for you, and those you have put there for youself won't exist. When you realise you'll always be stepping into some form of future, that assuredly may quell that fear.
I'm still grieving for the loss of a future i had forseen. I grieve for a stability i thought i'd have in the present. But when i'm desperately looking for something to cling to, the idea that time will always catch me is enough.
It has to be enough.
It's moment's like this when i realise, well i think, that fear of the future comes only when you have the expectation of it to be something. It's fear that those expectations won't be met - those projections others have put out there for you, and those you have put there for youself won't exist. When you realise you'll always be stepping into some form of future, that assuredly may quell that fear.
I'm still grieving for the loss of a future i had forseen. I grieve for a stability i thought i'd have in the present. But when i'm desperately looking for something to cling to, the idea that time will always catch me is enough.
It has to be enough.