Fic: The Road of Destiny (4/?)
Title: The Road of Destiny (4/?)
Author: crystal_mk
Pairing: Matt/Mohinder
Rating: PG-13 for this part but NC-17 on the whole
Summary: Destiny writes the road, but do we get to choose whether or not we follow?
Disclaimer: I is poor and own nothing
AN: This is going waaaay slower than expected. Sorry guys.
“You’re not thinking rationally!” Matthew yelled at me.
“Yes I am Matthew,” I said wearily, rubbing my temple in an effort to ward off the headache I felt coming.
Molly was safely at school and we were having the same argument we had been having for two days. I decided that I was going to agree to go along with Bennet’s plan. I would try to create the virus he wanted, hopefully giving our side the ammunition needed to finally defeat Sylar. To put it politely, Matthew was not happy with my decision.
“Last time you got involved in his plots, he got you stuck in The Company. We can’t even think about leaving without being worried that they’ll be there to meet us at the airport. At least before we had some sense of security in knowing that they can’t track us everywhere now that we have Molly. Now they know our every move. This is a mistake Mohinder. Not only is it a mistake, it’s a stupid mistake. Didn’t we learn our lesson the first time?”
“Why are you so upset? You were okay with two nights ago,” I said harshly, feeling helpless and confused.
“That was before I actually heard his crazy plan. Dealing with the virus is dangerous enough, playing with it is just begging it to explode in your face!”
“I won’t be playing with it, I’ll be carefully manipulating in a sterile, controlled, safe environment where every precaution and safety measure will be taken.”
“I’m not two years old Mohinder; stop talking to me like I’m a child!” Matthew exploded at me.
“Perhaps if you weren’t acting like a child I wouldn’t need to treat you as one,” I yelled back.
We were standing a foot apart, facing off as two gladiators at the Collosseum in a battle to the death as an audience of Sylars cheered when Emperor Bennet signaled the release of the hungry lions, rather than the lovers and partners we really are.
“Fine,” Matthew huffed, throwing his hands up in the air, “You go ahead and do what you want, it’s what you’re going to do anyways.”
He ran a hand through his hair, face suddenly registering exhaustion, “I’m going to be late for work,” he said resignedly.
“Matthew,” I said softly and reached out to him, regretting my words immediately.
He jerked away, refusing to meet my eyes, and grabbed his coat from the rack, opening and shutting the door before it even registered to me that he was actually leaving.
I sat down at the table with a heavy sigh, leaning down to rest my head in my hands. The morning conversation that I had spent half the night planning down to the last comma hadn’t gone nearly as well as I expected, as I hoped. I was hoping for Matthew’s support but would have been just as happy with his understanding. I didn’t want to have to do this without him. I needed him by my side. I don’t think I can do this without him at my back, keeping me grounded and safe. I would have to try to convince him tonight. Right now I was going to be late for my second foray into the depths of purgatory to have a little chat with Noah Bennet.
I was still unsure of the reasonableness, or the intelligence really, of this plan. More importantly, I still was doubtful of the feasibility of the plan. Could it be done? You may as well just ask me be recreate my own Big Bang complete with new life organisms and a self-sustaining ecosystem. That might actually be easier. I know more about that. Adjusting the genetic makeup of a virus so that it would attack the genetic makeup of just one human being without any collateral damage; it is the stuff of science fiction. I have this unusually disturbing and yet, still amusing image in my head of the old Frankenstein movies that Matthew and Molly enjoy terrifying themselves with. I keep picturing me in a lab coat with leather gloves and my hair standing on end, laughing manically and shouting “it’s alive!” whilst flipping the switch that brings the monster to life, allowing it to run free and wreak havoc on an unsuspecting town.
Unnervingly appropriate as well.
Disturbing thoughts aside, I had to protect my family at all costs. Matthew and Molly were all that mattered to me and if protecting them meant dealing with the devil in horn-rimmed glasses than so be it.
I know he gets coffee everyday at the same shop two blocks from the office so two days after our little “discussion”, I waited for him at a table in the back, by the windows. I was not worried that he wouldn’t see me in the morning crush of caffeine addicts that reminded me just slightly of a bleary eyed and fumbling Matthew before he gets his first cup of coffee. I would be more worried if he failed to see me and would have to seriously rethink the wisdom of getting involved with a man who was not playing his “A-game” as Matthew would say. Especially when Sylar was the opponent and our lives were the prize for winning.
He walked in, cool and confident in a way that made me hate the butterflies fluttering around in my stomach even more. I didn’t want to be this nervous, it made you vulnerable. Bennet would take advantage of my anxiety if I let him. I could tell the second he glimpsed me, the telling quirk of his lips turning my edginess into annoyance.
“Mohinder,” he said with false brightness as he approached my table, snake oil smile sending a shiver up my spine, “I’m glad to see you. I didn’t take you for a coffee man. Always figured that would be Matt’s department.”
So this was how he was going to play the game. Matthew had all but told him we were involved as more than temporary roommates to raise Molly the other night. He wanted to gauge how deep my relationship with Matthew went but wouldn’t directly ask about it, so he would instead subtly hint at it and try to trick me into revealing it. At the same time he wanted the satisfaction of knowing that I came to him this time.
Well, two can play this game Bennet.
I pasted my own smile on my face, holding my cup of tea up, “I can’t speak for Matthew but this shop makes an absolutely divine chai tea.”
“Oh,” he said, “Did someone at work tell you how great this little shop is, or did you discover it for yourself?”
His arrogant tone and smug expression had me gritting my teeth and clenching my hand tighter around the plastic cup to resist the urge to pour the rest of my tea down on his head. It grated painfully that he was so confident in my acquiescing to his plan which, although true, was never a given.
“Actually Noah, I’ve been meaning to try the tea here for some time,” I responded coolly.
“Splendid, so glad that you managed to try it. Shall we walk to work together?” he asked, waving me ahead of him.
I stood up and made my way through the throng of people and out the door, careful to avoid bumping into them. Bennet followed close at my heels, everyone moving out of the way for him. We walked in silence for a minute before he finally broke down and interrupted the peace first.
“I take this to mean you’ve reconsidered.”
“On a probationary status. I don’t know if what you are asking is even possible but I will try. However, I can’t make any guarantees. And the rules Matthew set down still apply. Now I want you to answer something for me. If I do succeed in creating the virus, how do you plan on infecting Sylar? I can promise you that it is unlikely that he will just sit still and allow you to stick a needle in his arm.”
“Why don’t you just let me worry about that?”
“Why don’t you just tell me what your plan is instead of playing this game that you won’t win?” I said, stopping suddenly and forcing him to a halt beside me, “You want my help, I want to know everything. This isn’t going to work like before; no secrets this time. If you find that task impossible, then I would suggest finding someone else with access to the Shanti virus and knowledge enough to attempt the manipulation.”
He stared hard at me a moment, annoyance flickering across his face before it was replaced with the usual stony calm, “Okay.”
“So what is your plan to infect Sylar?” I pressed.
“Peter Petrelli. He has HIro Nakumura’s ability to stop time and he’s the only one who can go up against him and stand a chance.”
I gaped at him, “Are you actually serious? Do you honestly believe that Peter Petrelli will help you? You assassinated his brother!”
“That can’t be proven,” he said nonchalantly, “Besides, he won’t be helping me; he’ll be helping you.”
“Matthew was right,” I said, shaking my head, “This plan is insane and you’re insane and this is not going to work.”
“You can tell Peter what you deem appropriate. He doesn’t need to know about my involvement.”
He resumed walking and I followed behind him, slightly dazed.
I shook my head again, “This is not going to work.”
“Don’t be such a pessimist Mohinder,” Bennet said, clapping me hard on the back.
Then he was gone and I was left to wander my way to the lab.
What have I gotten myself into?
I was afraid to go home for the first time since right after I discovered Sylar’s deception. I kept replaying this morning’s argument in my head all day. I barely got any work done and ended up breaking two beakers (which thankfully were empty). I was so involved in berating myself for my loss of control and yelling at Matthew that I didn’t even notice the time until I happened to glance at the clock. I was already an hour late.
I quickly packed my stuff and called home. The answering machine picked it up and I left a message apologizing and assuring them that I was on my way home. My hand was shaking as I unlocked the door with numb fingers when I finally made it home. I was dreading Molly’s panic and tears and another confrontation with Matthew. However, only silence greeted me in the dim shadows of the small apartment. Before panic fully set in I spied a slip of paper written on in Matthew’s scrawl taped to the fridge.
Went out for food. Bring you something back.
-Matt and Molly
I sank into the chair with a half-sob as the breath I didn’t realize I was holding squeezed out of my lungs. I was shaking and had to clutch the edge of the chair to keep from falling off. My head snapped up as the front door opened and Matthew and Molly came in. He carried a brown paper bag of Chinese, if my sense of smell could be relied on, and she was chattering happily at him.
“And I got a ninety-eight on my- Mohinder!” she cried, rushing into my arms.
I hugged her tight, reassuring myself with her warm embrace that she was alright. I saw Matthew cock his head out of the corner of my eye and switched to Tamil, hoping that he hadn’t picked up on my frightened thoughts.
“We brought food. Matt said that you would be okay with take-out cause it’s Friday and everything,” Molly said brightly, releasing me to go help Matthew unpack.
“Of course it’s alright darling,” I assured her.
“Why don’t’ you go pick a movie to watch doll-face,” Matthew said, nodding her towards the living room.
She nodded and hugged him quickly before skipping out to living room. Matthew moved to the counter, brushing a hand across my back along the way, and opened the top cupboard to take plates down. I moved to stand behind him, unsure of what to say.
“I know we just had pizza the other night but I thought you might be late today and figured…”
He went silent as I wrapped my arms around his waist, pressing a kiss to the patch of exposed skin between his shoulder and neck and resting my chin on his shoulder.
“Please don’t be angry with me Matthew. Please don’t push me away. I need you.”
He turned around and cupped my chin in one hand, angling my face up to kiss him. He broke the kiss to press our foreheads together, “I’m not mad Mohinder; I’m worried. I’m worried and I’m scared of losing you. I don’t want to be the person to tell Molly you’re not coming home.”
“I know,” I said earnestly, “I don’t want to be the person to tell Molly you are not coming home. That’s why I have to try. Don’t you understand Matthew? I can’t live in fear of Sylar finding you and killing you and having to be the one to tell our little girl her hero isn’t coming home. I have to try.”
Matthew sighed and leaned into me, laying his head against my shoulder, “I can’t lose you Mohinder.”
I squeezed my eyes shut, blocking the hot tears that threatened my composure, “You won’t Matthew, not if I have anything to say about it.”
“You can’t promise that.”
“Can you promise that some junkie won’t shoot you one day or some drunk driver won’t run you off the road one night? You can’t and neither can I. The best we can do is promise to try. I can promise you that I will try my damndest to make sure I come home every night to you and to Molly.”
“You fucking better,” Matthew said, kissing me again.
I tangled my fingers in his hair, kissing him desperately, as he slid his hands down to grip my hips tightly. I felt like I was drowning and he was the only thing keeping my head above water.
“Seriously guys, if you’re gonna make-out I’m gonna watch the movie and eat by myself,” Molly’s voice interrupted us.
We broke apart laughing. Matthew grabbed the plates while I quickly swiped my cheeks to brush away the tears that had accidentally fallen.
“What did you pick darling?” I asked her as we squished onto the couch.
“Alvin and the Chipmunks Meet Frankenstein.”