Mixed Feelings....
Well I guess it's time to update this damn thing.... since it's been a while. So here goes. Lately I been having alot of mixed feelings, I mean right now I'm not 100% sure if Rob loves me and wants to be with me and his son, (lately he's been callin me every name under the son n doin jack shit with me and his son, and if I ask him to help or anything around the apartment it's a no!)
And I been having the feeling like he's possibly cheating on me also, but I can't point a finger or prove it.... I mean I'm always alone at the apartment with our son, I'm always doin all the cooking, cleaning and ect. And now lately I had an old friend come back into my life that I loved dearly... I'm not goin to mention any names, but this person has had a huge part of my heart for a long time, and I was just too stupid to tell this person back then how I truely felt and shit... and now for some reason, I feel all my old feelings commin back for this person, stronger then ever. And I just don't know what to do. Plus with everything goin on with my parents and crap I'm kinda been over depressed lately... I guess I just don't know what to do in my life anymore... like over the weekend I went campin with Rob and a few friends and needless to say I was stuck with Rob's mother all weekend at the camp site while Rob did whatever he was doin, he never once spent any time with me... and the only person I could think of was the person who still is holding onto a huge peice of my heart. And for some reason lately I been feeling like I really shouldn't be here, that I should be dead or something cuz of all the crap I'm goin though. I'm sick of being alone and so depressed, and it seems like the only reason I'm sticking in here is for my son Dante. And today for once I felt sorta happy again, when I was at the lake with my son. But yet I feel like I should leave where I am now in my life n start over with someone else or something, I don't know I'm soo confused..... n I really don't have no one to talk to... ugh, when will I feel like my old self again???
And I been having the feeling like he's possibly cheating on me also, but I can't point a finger or prove it.... I mean I'm always alone at the apartment with our son, I'm always doin all the cooking, cleaning and ect. And now lately I had an old friend come back into my life that I loved dearly... I'm not goin to mention any names, but this person has had a huge part of my heart for a long time, and I was just too stupid to tell this person back then how I truely felt and shit... and now for some reason, I feel all my old feelings commin back for this person, stronger then ever. And I just don't know what to do. Plus with everything goin on with my parents and crap I'm kinda been over depressed lately... I guess I just don't know what to do in my life anymore... like over the weekend I went campin with Rob and a few friends and needless to say I was stuck with Rob's mother all weekend at the camp site while Rob did whatever he was doin, he never once spent any time with me... and the only person I could think of was the person who still is holding onto a huge peice of my heart. And for some reason lately I been feeling like I really shouldn't be here, that I should be dead or something cuz of all the crap I'm goin though. I'm sick of being alone and so depressed, and it seems like the only reason I'm sticking in here is for my son Dante. And today for once I felt sorta happy again, when I was at the lake with my son. But yet I feel like I should leave where I am now in my life n start over with someone else or something, I don't know I'm soo confused..... n I really don't have no one to talk to... ugh, when will I feel like my old self again???