(no subject)
In my new studio, Unknown Mortal Orchestra will be the background soundtrack. They will be the essence of my workplace.
Clean. Unique. History. Love. Personalization. Similar to the concept of a tattoo being sketched for you by a skilled and experienced tattoo artist - pieces will be drawn to compliment the face or style/figure of the individual. I have been having trouble figuring out the right septum jewelry style for myself. Lost in a sea of limited options with very specific boundaries - the most beautiful pieces are priced well out of my range, and I missed my chance to get the two very unique bvla pieces I wanted. But it is losing out on this second piece that is pushing me to finally pursue metalworking/jewelry making. I will replicate the piece, and I will keep on making pieces to help express who I am. High quality, affordable pricing for what it is, hopefully.
I think most humans are pretty lonely anymore. I think the community is lost to digital reality. If this is the case, I can accept the loss of a social identity, and accept that whatever I make myself into is - everything I will be to others. I must love myself. If I can survive, financially, off of cultivating the things that make me love life or myself, then...well....sounds like the best plan to fix my woes and issues.
I've learned I don't even really like the company of others. I don't like trying to make new friends. It brings up so many issues for me. Very nerve wracking - and sometimes the anxiety that comes with it digs into the old things that are very deep seated and ignored and not acknowledged by me. I don't like having those things come up and pierce the reality I exist in currently. It's weird - I really feel so lost in this world. I hate the changes that are surging against the shore. It's so much, so much, so much right now. I don't remember this much change in the last 15 years of my life. Stores, landscapes, spaces, housing, food - it's all changing. It's so unsettling. I went to Ikea last week. I thought they were just remodeling the parking spaces. No - it was a whole new store and whole new parking lot. The comfort of that place is gone. They got rid of their solid potatoes ages ago - the food tastes more and more bland and loveless with time. I just. I want the old place back. I need the old place back. I hate the big new cafeteria. I hate that the parking is uncovered and like a normal parking lot. I hate how busy it is, how separated and odd it is now. I want the old layout and enclosed and opened spaces back. But I have to learn the world is always changing and will never remain the same. Change is sometimes what was meant to be.
Why can't I let go of the past? Why ..... why..... why....Is all I want to know. Everything I don't know. I want to feel and live what I don't know. If the world is radical, I will be too. Maybe. If I work hard enough.
Clean. Unique. History. Love. Personalization. Similar to the concept of a tattoo being sketched for you by a skilled and experienced tattoo artist - pieces will be drawn to compliment the face or style/figure of the individual. I have been having trouble figuring out the right septum jewelry style for myself. Lost in a sea of limited options with very specific boundaries - the most beautiful pieces are priced well out of my range, and I missed my chance to get the two very unique bvla pieces I wanted. But it is losing out on this second piece that is pushing me to finally pursue metalworking/jewelry making. I will replicate the piece, and I will keep on making pieces to help express who I am. High quality, affordable pricing for what it is, hopefully.
I think most humans are pretty lonely anymore. I think the community is lost to digital reality. If this is the case, I can accept the loss of a social identity, and accept that whatever I make myself into is - everything I will be to others. I must love myself. If I can survive, financially, off of cultivating the things that make me love life or myself, then...well....sounds like the best plan to fix my woes and issues.
I've learned I don't even really like the company of others. I don't like trying to make new friends. It brings up so many issues for me. Very nerve wracking - and sometimes the anxiety that comes with it digs into the old things that are very deep seated and ignored and not acknowledged by me. I don't like having those things come up and pierce the reality I exist in currently. It's weird - I really feel so lost in this world. I hate the changes that are surging against the shore. It's so much, so much, so much right now. I don't remember this much change in the last 15 years of my life. Stores, landscapes, spaces, housing, food - it's all changing. It's so unsettling. I went to Ikea last week. I thought they were just remodeling the parking spaces. No - it was a whole new store and whole new parking lot. The comfort of that place is gone. They got rid of their solid potatoes ages ago - the food tastes more and more bland and loveless with time. I just. I want the old place back. I need the old place back. I hate the big new cafeteria. I hate that the parking is uncovered and like a normal parking lot. I hate how busy it is, how separated and odd it is now. I want the old layout and enclosed and opened spaces back. But I have to learn the world is always changing and will never remain the same. Change is sometimes what was meant to be.
Why can't I let go of the past? Why ..... why..... why....Is all I want to know. Everything I don't know. I want to feel and live what I don't know. If the world is radical, I will be too. Maybe. If I work hard enough.