(no subject)
Well... Here goes another rare post for me... I know I only post like once a quarter... but I do read my friends' posts quite a bit. I'm still living in the duplex that I call home, with 4 other strangers. Well they're not really strangers, but it feels like it sometimes. Ugh I'm so tired of drama! DRAMA DRAMA DRAMA... that's all that comes from this house. My life has gone to shit since I moved here, it's got to be the duplex. Yeah, that's what I'll blame it on. Even though, most of it is my fault & probably would have happened anyway... but it makes me feel better to blame it on the duplex. My roommates never seem to get along. They all hate my boyfriend. They say it's because he's lazy, but I don't know. Other people in the house are lazy & no one seems to notice. I think it's just "Attack Matt Month". *sigh* I just wish we could all be happy and drama free. I woke up this morning to Katy and Tom fighting, literally. So, I stayed up in my room as long as I could before my bladder and growling tummy started screaming at me to get out of bed to relieve and feed them. Forgive me please, I'm just rambling on, but I have a lot built up right now. One of my roommates is addicted to pain meds, which makes life even harder. I'm so worried about her, but every time I try to talk to her about it she thinks I'm attacking her and we end up fighting. I feel like I can't ever do anything right around here. I always feel like I'm being attacked about everything I do.... if it's not people bitching about my boyfriend, then it's something else. I always seem to be in the middle of it and I don't know what to do. Sy keeps talking to me about moving in with him & Amy, but things change from day to day. I really have no where else to go except to my grandparents' house and I would have to give up my cats for that. I'm not willing to get rid of my "children". All you people out there with pets know exactly what I'm talking about. Also, those of you that knew me when I lived with my grandparents know why I don't want to go back. I love my family, especially my grandma, they have helped me a lot. Yeah, I had my shit together then, but I didn't have a life to enjoy it. I didn't really have any friends, because I was stuck in a podunk town out in the middle of nowhere & I had to drive 20 to 30 minutes just to hang out with someone. Sy keeps telling me how Amy is mentioning just wanting to live alone, which would probably be best for them. They are still a young couple, and I'm sure all the drama from 2 other couples in the house is hurting their relationship a little. Actually I think it's hurting all of our relationships. I'm tired of the fighting. Tired of the disrespect. Tired of it all. I wish Matt and I could afford to finally get our own place without having to rely on roommates, but unfortunately we can't do that just yet. I like Katy and Tom as friends, but as roommates they are really disrespectful. Everything has to be their way or the highway. Sy promised me that I could come live with them, he also promised Katy and Tom... so this madness will continue when we move. I got kind of upset last night when Sy was telling me about some of the places they were looking at. He said that they found a place that was only like $325 a month... but it was a 2 bedroom. He tried to say something like "you could just sleep on the futon in the living room until Katy and Tom move out". Eh he didn't! He's talking about not being able to live with them anymore, but he's gonna give them the bedroom and make me sleep in the living room. They pretty much turned the living room here into their bedroom (when they are up that's where they're at) so why would I want to sleep on the futon in the living room? I can't believe he would even ask that... would he want to sleep on the futon in the living room & never have any privacy? If he's looking at 2 bedrooms, then he needs to decide who he wants living with him, or start looking at 3 bedrooms if he can't choose. Katy and Tom actually have some sort of income right now, which I don't... so they could save for a couple weeks & get a place of their own, but I think they would rather live off of who ever will let them. I'm tired of feeling used and uncomfortable in my own house. Does anyone have any suggestions how I can feel better about this situation? Or how I can get myself away from it or at least reduce my stress levels a little bit? I'm sorry I've been just rambling on, jumping from point to point, but I needed to vent & this was the only way I could think of to vent besides going off on Matt. I think I'm done for now, though. Thank you to all that stuck with me and read the whole thing. I feel a lot better now than I did when I started this. I hope everyone had a better day than I did!