(no subject)
I cannot take it anymore. Everything is hurting me lately, even things I thought were a blessing have now become another lead weight on my back. Moving into this neighborhood? Horrible. The fight to get up in the morning is strenuious with my mom because when we were living father away I had that time with her in the morning while she drove me to school. Getting this laptop? Horrible. I seem to be resorting to this with my everythings.. sad? bored? angry? sick? I will sit at this laptop no matter the conditions. My bigger room? Horrible. It just gives my mom more of an excuse to trouble me with it. It's not a messy room, it's a teenager's room. She just doesn't understand that. I'm a TEENAGER. We aren't the most cleanest, organized, straight-a students we might have been a few years ago. My mom is still hoping that I will drop my social life and become the loner I was but it might be for the best. Go back to the old life when I still let her pick out my clothes and I didn't straighten my hair.. when I thought eyeliner was for freaks and dying your hair was going against god's choices. When reading a book was more thrilling then listening to music and shower time with 7 and TV time was 8-8:30. When I was sheltered from life, from everything and anything that might corrupt me. When I would practice piano for 2 hours a day. When I would ride my bike with knee/elbow pads and when staying up late was a definate no. When saying swear words would revoke the right of desert and when I DIDN'T HAVE ANY CHOICES.
I don't want anymore choices because apparently I can't make them right.
I'm always wrong.
Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong.
I am not your little girl anymore, mom.
I don't want anymore choices because apparently I can't make them right.
I'm always wrong.
Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong.
I am not your little girl anymore, mom.