The week gone by & the week ahead
The weekend that I was dreading has been and gone. It could have been much worse, but it could have also been better. The afternoon was lovely - it was great to see S having such a nice time at her birthday do. Loads of people turned out, the rugby went in favour of the Welsh (which although I couldn't give a monkey's about it did make for a jovial atmosphere) and I chatted to plenty of people and had a very pleasant couple of hours. Poor J had to take to S's sofa for a couple of hours to rest his weary head. This throat infection has really laid him low, but like a trouper he made it to the bitter end of the festivities.
From the pub we made our way down to the Bay and steeled ourselves for the evening ahead with an extremely expensive burger. We made our way down to Bar Cwtch and some folks were already there - T, the birthday girl, looking glam and wearing fabulous shoes; G, being very host-like; some other folks we don't know so well; and D. I braced myself for the overaffectionate greeting, which passed with both J and I managing not to make any eye contact with D at all. From that point on, it was like we weren't there. Not a word uttered, not a glance made in our general direction. I think it would be fair to say that from a financial and friendship point of view, all bridges are burned.
It's a shame that we felt so uncomfortable, because there were plenty of other people there for us to talk to and apart from D we did have some nice chats with others. It's a shame that
minlliw wasn't able to make it because I was really looking forward to a catch-up, but she was on "putting drunken hubby to bed" duty :) There were a few hairy moments - I had an argument with a random bloke who said that one of our group looked like an escort girl; same bloke then got a pasting from some of the other men present because he was clearly speaking out of turn with other people too. Strange thing was, after I stood up to him about his nasty comments and faced him down, after he walked away I started to cry. I don't know why - his comments weren't directed at me, and I got him to agree to apologise for what he said - and the only thing I could think of was that I was just so overwrought by the situation with D. No-one else seems to notice it at all, and it makes me wonder if I'm just getting into a froth about nothing. J and I were sat in the middle of a crowd for much of the night whilst D was holding court with no-one talking to us and it just felt really strange. I was also extremely angry that it had been made out to be some kind of super-special surprise that was just for T, and that S had felt as though she and her friends (as opposed to our mutual friends) wouldn't be welcome. There wasn't anything that happened that would have been spoiled by more people being there. I hate this stupid separation of friends into "factions". It's like being back at school. By the age of 30, I'd hoped to have moved on from "are you her friend or are you my friend? Because you can't be both".
But it seemed as though T had an awesome time, which was the most important thing. She played the hostess with the mostess at the end of the evening, offering her birthday platter out to patrons in general and getting a group at the other end of the bar to sing happy birthday to her :)
So after a hectic Saturday of parties and politics I am now withdrawing from the world for the week. I have some really important things that I need to concentrate on - an interview on Thursday (in preparation for which I've just had a very interesting conversation with a colleague, who has passed me some "classified" information to help with my preparations), and an essay that needs to be in to college next week. So I'm logging out, as of now. No more LJ, Facebook or MSN for a week. I'm withdrawing physically and virtually, and I'll be back in about a week.
From the pub we made our way down to the Bay and steeled ourselves for the evening ahead with an extremely expensive burger. We made our way down to Bar Cwtch and some folks were already there - T, the birthday girl, looking glam and wearing fabulous shoes; G, being very host-like; some other folks we don't know so well; and D. I braced myself for the overaffectionate greeting, which passed with both J and I managing not to make any eye contact with D at all. From that point on, it was like we weren't there. Not a word uttered, not a glance made in our general direction. I think it would be fair to say that from a financial and friendship point of view, all bridges are burned.
It's a shame that we felt so uncomfortable, because there were plenty of other people there for us to talk to and apart from D we did have some nice chats with others. It's a shame that
minlliw wasn't able to make it because I was really looking forward to a catch-up, but she was on "putting drunken hubby to bed" duty :) There were a few hairy moments - I had an argument with a random bloke who said that one of our group looked like an escort girl; same bloke then got a pasting from some of the other men present because he was clearly speaking out of turn with other people too. Strange thing was, after I stood up to him about his nasty comments and faced him down, after he walked away I started to cry. I don't know why - his comments weren't directed at me, and I got him to agree to apologise for what he said - and the only thing I could think of was that I was just so overwrought by the situation with D. No-one else seems to notice it at all, and it makes me wonder if I'm just getting into a froth about nothing. J and I were sat in the middle of a crowd for much of the night whilst D was holding court with no-one talking to us and it just felt really strange. I was also extremely angry that it had been made out to be some kind of super-special surprise that was just for T, and that S had felt as though she and her friends (as opposed to our mutual friends) wouldn't be welcome. There wasn't anything that happened that would have been spoiled by more people being there. I hate this stupid separation of friends into "factions". It's like being back at school. By the age of 30, I'd hoped to have moved on from "are you her friend or are you my friend? Because you can't be both".
But it seemed as though T had an awesome time, which was the most important thing. She played the hostess with the mostess at the end of the evening, offering her birthday platter out to patrons in general and getting a group at the other end of the bar to sing happy birthday to her :)
So after a hectic Saturday of parties and politics I am now withdrawing from the world for the week. I have some really important things that I need to concentrate on - an interview on Thursday (in preparation for which I've just had a very interesting conversation with a colleague, who has passed me some "classified" information to help with my preparations), and an essay that needs to be in to college next week. So I'm logging out, as of now. No more LJ, Facebook or MSN for a week. I'm withdrawing physically and virtually, and I'll be back in about a week.