No...I'm not dead...yet.
This probably wont even be read, but I really rally want to write about my life. Right now, at this point in time, I have here at Grace U for about month and a week. I feel like I've been here for forever. I think that that is somewhat of a bad thing...selfishly speaking. I'm living in the dorms and I've made two bosom friends that I will know for the rest of my life. I've also made quite a few other casual friends which is impossible not to do since the student body is so small. My dorm hall is full of girls with hearts that long for Christ and for that reason, I feel at home. Sometimes, elsewhere, I feel like I'll be looked down upon for expressing the desire for a passionate relationship with Jesus. It's an uncomfortable feeling for me, being the people pleaser that I am. I hate that side of myself. I hate confrontations. a minor arguement will upset my whole day. I'm trying to get over this with God's help, but I think that it's going to be a long process. Time goes by both quickly and extremely slowly. Most of my time is spent doing homework and lying in the hall until midnight talking about whatever is on our minds. Right now, theres this thing with a guy thats majorly confusing me. I've been praying a lot about it and God's given me peace about it, but I still think about it too much. I guess the last two years of high school was spent worrying about everything but guys and I thought that my emotions could take something as silly as this..but it turns out that the human heart is very difficult to contain. I feel so weak and vurnerable about this whole thing. That's probably normal, but it scares me majorly.so..anyway..thats all I really want to rehash at the moment..