In My Arms (2/?)
Title: In My Arms (2/?)
Author: crumpledquill
Fandom: True Blood
Rating: R
Genre: AU
Pairing: Pam/Jessica (Jessica/Nan, Pam/Nan)
Spoilers: None as it's AU
Disclaimer: I disclaim all characters etc that aren't mine.
Summary: Sequel to Let's Get Lost. Nan is Jessica's 'maker', but what happens when they visit Louisiana? Queue Pam. Set a few years after Let's Get Lost.
“You’re leaving me again aren’t you?” Jessica asked, her voice sounding meek and lifeless - not at all herself.
Nan turned slowly to face her, he expression that of concern. Her hand lingered on the doorframe. From where she stood Jessica looked tiny, she seemed more like the child she usually acted like. The redhead sat upon yet another hotel bed, watching her maker leave her, as always was the case.
“Why do you make me stay if you just leave me?”
It wasn’t healthy for a vampire to feel like this. Nan herself knew that. She thought back to when she was Jessica’s age - the streets were painted red. Now she stood proud for vampire rights. Now she always got what she wanted, no matter the cost. She couldn’t conceal her smirk as she thought of Pam crying as she took what she loved most.
“Do you think it’s funny?” Jessica pressed, trying to sound as snappy and as spoiled as ever. Trouble was, she was neither of those things, “I barely know how to fend for myself.”
“Oh please,” Nan sighed, rolling her eyes. She nodded to her bodyguards who left the room on instinct, giving her a moment, “Don’t come that.”
She paced slowly into the room, eyebrow raised with suspicion that Jessica knew nothing about.
“You’re usually glad to get rid of me,” she continued, “Why are you feeling sorry for yourself all of a sudden?”
Jessica stood up, hands on her hips. Her maker chuckled in mirth,
“That’s my girl.”
She cringed at Nan’s words,
“I’m not your girl.”
Her comment fell on deaf ears. The blonde was already halfway toward the door. She waved a dismissive hand.
“Go out tonight - have fun.”
**
Jessica did just that. Except it hadn’t been that fun so far. She’d been forced, yet again, to trail two burly vampire bodyguards around with her. It was always the same wherever she went. Honestly, it was obvious that Nan was scared she would run off. But how could she run from the one who made her? It was just infuriating, and Jessica thought she did it on purpose to make her hate her very existence.
It wasn’t as if her bodyguards even spoke to her either. Even when she asked where the best place was to go around here - they were apparently supposed to know these things after all.
“Fine,” she grumbled, grabbing her bag, “Shreveport it is then.”
They drove her there, which took an hour or so. She kept staring out the window of the car, her mind recognising certain things but with no recollection of how or why. Heck, she didn’t even know why she chose to go to Shreveport. It was beginning to freaking her out, this whole déjà vu thing. It wasn’t as if she could ask anyone about it - no one would talk to her. She began to wonder if it was some strange vampire power she had. Nan hadn’t even said if vampires had powers. Maybe it was. She did feel kind of - different.
Eventually the car stopped. The door was opened for Jessica to climb out. She did so with as little grace as usual. Her eyes scanned the area - it felt like she’d been here before.
“This is it?” she asked one of the vampires who accompanied her. The towering male just looked down at her and grunted, nodding.
Jessica glanced forward to where they were facing. Fangtasia - a vampire bar, located in a breather’s shopping district.
“Talk about clichés,” she muttered, walking toward the entrance. She smiled to herself and added, “I like it.”
**
Pam was working the door tonight as she had been for the past few nights. She was becoming tired of the same old same old; she wasn’t able to tolerate fang bangers as well as before. Eric agreed it was best for her to stay out of the way - she hadn’t been in the best of the moods for a long time, since Jessica stopped appearing on television.
Jessica was still alive, although the thought had crossed Pam’s mind that maybe Nan had killed her. She wouldn’t put it past the bitch. But the connection was still there, though as weak as ever on Jessica’s side. Pam wondered if the girl even remembered her - she hoped that wasn’t the case. She hardly felt her pull; it never strengthened, only weakened. That being the case she was never able to tell where she was, she could have been in Louisiana for all she knew.
“ID,” she groaned at a human male, who looked offended that she asked for such a thing.
“Don’t make me repeat myself imbecile.”
“I’m twenty seven man,” he snapped, hands patting himself over searching his jeans and jacket for what Pam asked for.
She raised an eyebrow and placed a hand on her hip.
“Oh come on man,” he groaned, sensing where this was leading, “Come on - do I look underage?”
She rolled he eyes, baring her fangs to scare the little fucker away.
“I’ve been alive for so long, I no longer hold a concept of age - no ID no entry.”
He nodded, not looking as brave as before. He shrunk underneath her stare and turned, fleeing in the opposite direction as fast as his legs could carry him. Pam inwardly laughed, retracting her fangs. Moments like that made her smile - even for a little while.
“Next,” she sighed, eyes not looking up who was next in line, “ID,” she spoke automatically.
There was a silence, and the sound of someone clearing their throat nervously. Then a familiar voice spoke up,
“I-I’m eighteen - well I was when I was made.”
With wide eyes Pam stole a glance at the girl. If she had a heart, it would have been racing right about now. She swallowed back the lump in her throat, having to blink to make sure she wasn’t just seeing things.
“Jessica?” she asked, in a tone of voice she hadn’t used for years.
A flash of recognition appeared on Jessica’s face. She smiled, that same sweet smile Pam loved, only to have it falter. Pam felt it in her blood, the confusion her child felt - but the fact she felt it was better than anything she could have wished for. It was her. It wasn’t just a dream.
“Y-You must be a fan right?” she asked shyly, “Have I met you before?”
Pam nodded, smiling back at her trying to keep her cool - she wouldn’t cry, not here.
“Yeah,” she breathed, “Huge fan - between you and me, you’re a world better than Nan Flanagan.”
The girl glanced to the floor with a bashfulness Pam remembered too well.
“Thank you,” she spoke softly, “Thank you Pam.”
Jessica beamed at her, not knowing where the name came from. But it was right, the woman didn’t object. In fact she smiled back, and somewhere deep down she knew it was an honour. In fact, it made her stomach tingle with glee.
“That’s alright Kitten,” she replied, letting the girl step inside the bar - guards and all. Jessica had to turn her head and look at her before being swallowed into the fray. Someone used to call her Kitten before...someone far away.
**
“Pamela,” Eric greeted his protégé with tact. He couldn’t show any sign of comfort, he had to keep up the show for the fang bangers that worshipped him.
“Eric,” she bowed slightly, respectfully. She took a seat beside his throne once he shooed away a couple of mortal girls. His eyes met hers - and he knew what she was thinking before she opened her mouth.
“Go to her,” he spoke in ‘their’ language, so evesdroppers couldn’t understand.
“How can I - she doesn’t even know who I am?”
“How can she not?” he spoke his eyes pinpointing her from across the room. Jessica literally jumped, like a child caught stealing candy - she’d been staring, “I beg to differ.”
Pam quickly followed his eyes and glanced back, just as quickly, to her maker,
“Would it be wise? The Magister said-”
“Pamela,” he cooed, his hand gently touching her hair. She gazed up at him, eyes brimming. He smiled, “She is your child as you are mine. Nobody can change that. Nobody can replace her true maker - you.”
She nodded,
“I’m lucky I have you.”
“I’m lucky you’re so loyal.”
**
She knew they were talking about her, for some reason she couldn’t take her eyes off of Pam. There was something about her that drew her in and she didn’t want to let go. Jessica only looked away when she saw the woman get up; she was suddenly interested in the lid off her bottle of tru blood.
“Having fun?” asked Pam, her hand hovering over Jessica’s shoulder - she didn’t dare touch her.
Jessica looked up, meeting her eyes. She gave a nervous smile,
“Y-Yeah - thanks.”
“Sure?” she asked leaning in closer. Jessica’s bodyguards took a step forward at that. Jessica waved them away.
“It’s alright she’s - a friend.”
They stepped away again; Jessica glared at them long enough to get them to disperse into the crowd. Nan didn’t need to know everything.
“Well looked after I see,” Pam smirked, if Jessica could blush she would have.
“Well - Nan is...like that,” she shrugged as Pam sat down opposite her.
“Overprotective?”
“A little,” Jessica agreed. Pam smiled and watched her stare down at her bottle. Not much had changed with her little one, not much at all.
Pam opened her mouth to speak but Jessica cut her off, quickly looking up and interrupting before she could even begin.
“Back there, you called me Kitten. Nobody has called me that before.”
Pam read her puzzled expression and shrugged it off with another smile,
“It’s just a name sweetheart.”
“But why?” she insisted leaning over the table, her voice becoming hushed, “I - it was like I remembered it. Like you said it before, but I don’t even know you.”
Pam smiled and on instinct she gently touched her hair, much like how Eric comforted her, she pushed the red locks behind her ear.
“Some things we’re best off not knowing.”
There was a silence. Both were unable to stop staring at one another. Everything else melted away - the nightclub, Eric...Nan. And then Jessica felt herself leaning in and she kissed her.
Pam felt like a child herself, she remembered their first kiss and their last. Inside she was bumbling like an idiot. Inside she was yearning to just hold her - tell her the truth. Her mind was screaming at her. She shut off, melting into her. Jessica’s tongue slipped into her mouth. Pam wondered where she learned to kiss like that but tried not to think of it.
Jessica’s eyes slipped shut, she followed her heart. It was right - at least it felt right, it felt more than that, something so much more. Nan couldn’t evoke such emotion for her, in all the years they had spent together. It was just a kiss, but Jessica knew-
“We had better leave.”
A hand placed itself on Jessica’s shoulder. Her kiss came to an abrupt end. She glanced up at one of her ‘bodyguards’ with a look of murder.
“Oh now you decide to speak to me!” she snapped pushing his hand off her shoulder. She turned to face Pam, smiling sadly, she took her hand lacing their fingers together - trying to ignore the asshole behind her.
“Nan has told me to escort you back immediately,” he interrupted again. Jessica knew it was futile. She heaved her shoulders, her eyes unable to leave Pam’s.
“I take it you have to go,” Pam was the one to speak up, unable to help feeling dejected.
“I’m sorry,” Jessica sighed, squeezing her hand. Pam smiled.
“She doesn’t own you Jessica - remember that,” she spoke, Jessica nodding automatically, “Don’t take any shit.”
“I won’t,” she laughed slightly, “I promise.”
“Ma’am,” the bodyguard spoke up once more.
“Alright alright!” she practically yelled, her gaze quickly flicking back to Pam.
“I’m sorry.”
“Never be sorry for something beyond your control,” Pam observed, once again stroking her hair, “It’ll work out.”
“I have to see you again,” Jessica spoke, rushed and confused - she leaned into her touch.
“You will Kitten. I promise.”
A hand grabbed her arm; her fingers were no longer laced with Pam’s. She felt cold inside, an odd feeling.
“Alright!” Jessica snapped, “No need to be pushy.”
She kept looking back at Pam as they escorted her out of the building. She swore she saw the other woman bleed. She didn’t know why exactly until a memory played through her mind’s eye.
“No - no, no, no. No!”
“I hereby rule that Pamela Swinford De Beauford will not come in contact with her protégé until her guardian and ruler - Nan Flanagan, sees fit a time to release her. This newborn will obey to her as if she is her maker, and may not leave until such a time comes.”
Part 3
Author: crumpledquill
Fandom: True Blood
Rating: R
Genre: AU
Pairing: Pam/Jessica (Jessica/Nan, Pam/Nan)
Spoilers: None as it's AU
Disclaimer: I disclaim all characters etc that aren't mine.
Summary: Sequel to Let's Get Lost. Nan is Jessica's 'maker', but what happens when they visit Louisiana? Queue Pam. Set a few years after Let's Get Lost.
“You’re leaving me again aren’t you?” Jessica asked, her voice sounding meek and lifeless - not at all herself.
Nan turned slowly to face her, he expression that of concern. Her hand lingered on the doorframe. From where she stood Jessica looked tiny, she seemed more like the child she usually acted like. The redhead sat upon yet another hotel bed, watching her maker leave her, as always was the case.
“Why do you make me stay if you just leave me?”
It wasn’t healthy for a vampire to feel like this. Nan herself knew that. She thought back to when she was Jessica’s age - the streets were painted red. Now she stood proud for vampire rights. Now she always got what she wanted, no matter the cost. She couldn’t conceal her smirk as she thought of Pam crying as she took what she loved most.
“Do you think it’s funny?” Jessica pressed, trying to sound as snappy and as spoiled as ever. Trouble was, she was neither of those things, “I barely know how to fend for myself.”
“Oh please,” Nan sighed, rolling her eyes. She nodded to her bodyguards who left the room on instinct, giving her a moment, “Don’t come that.”
She paced slowly into the room, eyebrow raised with suspicion that Jessica knew nothing about.
“You’re usually glad to get rid of me,” she continued, “Why are you feeling sorry for yourself all of a sudden?”
Jessica stood up, hands on her hips. Her maker chuckled in mirth,
“That’s my girl.”
She cringed at Nan’s words,
“I’m not your girl.”
Her comment fell on deaf ears. The blonde was already halfway toward the door. She waved a dismissive hand.
“Go out tonight - have fun.”
**
Jessica did just that. Except it hadn’t been that fun so far. She’d been forced, yet again, to trail two burly vampire bodyguards around with her. It was always the same wherever she went. Honestly, it was obvious that Nan was scared she would run off. But how could she run from the one who made her? It was just infuriating, and Jessica thought she did it on purpose to make her hate her very existence.
It wasn’t as if her bodyguards even spoke to her either. Even when she asked where the best place was to go around here - they were apparently supposed to know these things after all.
“Fine,” she grumbled, grabbing her bag, “Shreveport it is then.”
They drove her there, which took an hour or so. She kept staring out the window of the car, her mind recognising certain things but with no recollection of how or why. Heck, she didn’t even know why she chose to go to Shreveport. It was beginning to freaking her out, this whole déjà vu thing. It wasn’t as if she could ask anyone about it - no one would talk to her. She began to wonder if it was some strange vampire power she had. Nan hadn’t even said if vampires had powers. Maybe it was. She did feel kind of - different.
Eventually the car stopped. The door was opened for Jessica to climb out. She did so with as little grace as usual. Her eyes scanned the area - it felt like she’d been here before.
“This is it?” she asked one of the vampires who accompanied her. The towering male just looked down at her and grunted, nodding.
Jessica glanced forward to where they were facing. Fangtasia - a vampire bar, located in a breather’s shopping district.
“Talk about clichés,” she muttered, walking toward the entrance. She smiled to herself and added, “I like it.”
**
Pam was working the door tonight as she had been for the past few nights. She was becoming tired of the same old same old; she wasn’t able to tolerate fang bangers as well as before. Eric agreed it was best for her to stay out of the way - she hadn’t been in the best of the moods for a long time, since Jessica stopped appearing on television.
Jessica was still alive, although the thought had crossed Pam’s mind that maybe Nan had killed her. She wouldn’t put it past the bitch. But the connection was still there, though as weak as ever on Jessica’s side. Pam wondered if the girl even remembered her - she hoped that wasn’t the case. She hardly felt her pull; it never strengthened, only weakened. That being the case she was never able to tell where she was, she could have been in Louisiana for all she knew.
“ID,” she groaned at a human male, who looked offended that she asked for such a thing.
“Don’t make me repeat myself imbecile.”
“I’m twenty seven man,” he snapped, hands patting himself over searching his jeans and jacket for what Pam asked for.
She raised an eyebrow and placed a hand on her hip.
“Oh come on man,” he groaned, sensing where this was leading, “Come on - do I look underage?”
She rolled he eyes, baring her fangs to scare the little fucker away.
“I’ve been alive for so long, I no longer hold a concept of age - no ID no entry.”
He nodded, not looking as brave as before. He shrunk underneath her stare and turned, fleeing in the opposite direction as fast as his legs could carry him. Pam inwardly laughed, retracting her fangs. Moments like that made her smile - even for a little while.
“Next,” she sighed, eyes not looking up who was next in line, “ID,” she spoke automatically.
There was a silence, and the sound of someone clearing their throat nervously. Then a familiar voice spoke up,
“I-I’m eighteen - well I was when I was made.”
With wide eyes Pam stole a glance at the girl. If she had a heart, it would have been racing right about now. She swallowed back the lump in her throat, having to blink to make sure she wasn’t just seeing things.
“Jessica?” she asked, in a tone of voice she hadn’t used for years.
A flash of recognition appeared on Jessica’s face. She smiled, that same sweet smile Pam loved, only to have it falter. Pam felt it in her blood, the confusion her child felt - but the fact she felt it was better than anything she could have wished for. It was her. It wasn’t just a dream.
“Y-You must be a fan right?” she asked shyly, “Have I met you before?”
Pam nodded, smiling back at her trying to keep her cool - she wouldn’t cry, not here.
“Yeah,” she breathed, “Huge fan - between you and me, you’re a world better than Nan Flanagan.”
The girl glanced to the floor with a bashfulness Pam remembered too well.
“Thank you,” she spoke softly, “Thank you Pam.”
Jessica beamed at her, not knowing where the name came from. But it was right, the woman didn’t object. In fact she smiled back, and somewhere deep down she knew it was an honour. In fact, it made her stomach tingle with glee.
“That’s alright Kitten,” she replied, letting the girl step inside the bar - guards and all. Jessica had to turn her head and look at her before being swallowed into the fray. Someone used to call her Kitten before...someone far away.
**
“Pamela,” Eric greeted his protégé with tact. He couldn’t show any sign of comfort, he had to keep up the show for the fang bangers that worshipped him.
“Eric,” she bowed slightly, respectfully. She took a seat beside his throne once he shooed away a couple of mortal girls. His eyes met hers - and he knew what she was thinking before she opened her mouth.
“Go to her,” he spoke in ‘their’ language, so evesdroppers couldn’t understand.
“How can I - she doesn’t even know who I am?”
“How can she not?” he spoke his eyes pinpointing her from across the room. Jessica literally jumped, like a child caught stealing candy - she’d been staring, “I beg to differ.”
Pam quickly followed his eyes and glanced back, just as quickly, to her maker,
“Would it be wise? The Magister said-”
“Pamela,” he cooed, his hand gently touching her hair. She gazed up at him, eyes brimming. He smiled, “She is your child as you are mine. Nobody can change that. Nobody can replace her true maker - you.”
She nodded,
“I’m lucky I have you.”
“I’m lucky you’re so loyal.”
**
She knew they were talking about her, for some reason she couldn’t take her eyes off of Pam. There was something about her that drew her in and she didn’t want to let go. Jessica only looked away when she saw the woman get up; she was suddenly interested in the lid off her bottle of tru blood.
“Having fun?” asked Pam, her hand hovering over Jessica’s shoulder - she didn’t dare touch her.
Jessica looked up, meeting her eyes. She gave a nervous smile,
“Y-Yeah - thanks.”
“Sure?” she asked leaning in closer. Jessica’s bodyguards took a step forward at that. Jessica waved them away.
“It’s alright she’s - a friend.”
They stepped away again; Jessica glared at them long enough to get them to disperse into the crowd. Nan didn’t need to know everything.
“Well looked after I see,” Pam smirked, if Jessica could blush she would have.
“Well - Nan is...like that,” she shrugged as Pam sat down opposite her.
“Overprotective?”
“A little,” Jessica agreed. Pam smiled and watched her stare down at her bottle. Not much had changed with her little one, not much at all.
Pam opened her mouth to speak but Jessica cut her off, quickly looking up and interrupting before she could even begin.
“Back there, you called me Kitten. Nobody has called me that before.”
Pam read her puzzled expression and shrugged it off with another smile,
“It’s just a name sweetheart.”
“But why?” she insisted leaning over the table, her voice becoming hushed, “I - it was like I remembered it. Like you said it before, but I don’t even know you.”
Pam smiled and on instinct she gently touched her hair, much like how Eric comforted her, she pushed the red locks behind her ear.
“Some things we’re best off not knowing.”
There was a silence. Both were unable to stop staring at one another. Everything else melted away - the nightclub, Eric...Nan. And then Jessica felt herself leaning in and she kissed her.
Pam felt like a child herself, she remembered their first kiss and their last. Inside she was bumbling like an idiot. Inside she was yearning to just hold her - tell her the truth. Her mind was screaming at her. She shut off, melting into her. Jessica’s tongue slipped into her mouth. Pam wondered where she learned to kiss like that but tried not to think of it.
Jessica’s eyes slipped shut, she followed her heart. It was right - at least it felt right, it felt more than that, something so much more. Nan couldn’t evoke such emotion for her, in all the years they had spent together. It was just a kiss, but Jessica knew-
“We had better leave.”
A hand placed itself on Jessica’s shoulder. Her kiss came to an abrupt end. She glanced up at one of her ‘bodyguards’ with a look of murder.
“Oh now you decide to speak to me!” she snapped pushing his hand off her shoulder. She turned to face Pam, smiling sadly, she took her hand lacing their fingers together - trying to ignore the asshole behind her.
“Nan has told me to escort you back immediately,” he interrupted again. Jessica knew it was futile. She heaved her shoulders, her eyes unable to leave Pam’s.
“I take it you have to go,” Pam was the one to speak up, unable to help feeling dejected.
“I’m sorry,” Jessica sighed, squeezing her hand. Pam smiled.
“She doesn’t own you Jessica - remember that,” she spoke, Jessica nodding automatically, “Don’t take any shit.”
“I won’t,” she laughed slightly, “I promise.”
“Ma’am,” the bodyguard spoke up once more.
“Alright alright!” she practically yelled, her gaze quickly flicking back to Pam.
“I’m sorry.”
“Never be sorry for something beyond your control,” Pam observed, once again stroking her hair, “It’ll work out.”
“I have to see you again,” Jessica spoke, rushed and confused - she leaned into her touch.
“You will Kitten. I promise.”
A hand grabbed her arm; her fingers were no longer laced with Pam’s. She felt cold inside, an odd feeling.
“Alright!” Jessica snapped, “No need to be pushy.”
She kept looking back at Pam as they escorted her out of the building. She swore she saw the other woman bleed. She didn’t know why exactly until a memory played through her mind’s eye.
“No - no, no, no. No!”
“I hereby rule that Pamela Swinford De Beauford will not come in contact with her protégé until her guardian and ruler - Nan Flanagan, sees fit a time to release her. This newborn will obey to her as if she is her maker, and may not leave until such a time comes.”
Part 3