(no subject)
hey people, whats going on? i haven't updated in a while, so i thought i might, seing that it's currently 12:41am on thursday night/ friday morning, and i'm listen to "gently" by slipknot and just thinking a lot. i just got done with a fucking essay for my english class about a half hour ago. a fuckin four page essay on william shakespeare from when he was born until he was like fuckin thirty. meh... it sucks ass. i've been back into my music world again, like, when i sit there and actually pay attention to a song and the lyrics, and i figure out the meaning of the song, and i try to relate it to my life, yea well that sucks, because then you'll find a powerful song, such as "gently". to myself, gently is a strong song because it relates to me. some other people may read the lyrics and find that it doesn't realate them, but i've been through some shit, and it relates me 100 percent.
~~ Slipknot "Gently"
from their album:: "Iowa"
"Gently, my mind escapes into the relaxing
world of pleasure, a pleasure that'll take
my mind off the reality of my life,
my past life... life as I know it now.
And whatever may come, it slowly
disappears to somewhere in the back
of my mind. It will remain there,
until I wish to retrieve it.
Yes, I will stay here for a while,
for I need the break. A break from the
pressures of life, and everything
that lays in the palm of life's hands.
This mode is incredible. It's out of
this world. Too bad I must always leave it...
... but that's life.
so yea, if you understand the lyrics, you'll understand that my past life has sucked and i love to spend time in my own little world to escape reality for a bit. some people never understand why i do that, or never know when i'm doing that... but it is something i love to do, because the feeling is a drifting feeling.
School has actually been ok since vacation. i haven't had too much work besides the essay, but otherwise i really can't complain much. the only person in school thats been pissing me off is that faggot wigger bitch Furby, he loves to talk shit to me when he's in front of his friends, but when he's alone he runs like a fucking pussy ass bitch... i can't wait until i see him alone and i beat the shit outta him, and i wouldn't care if i got arrested over it, cuz me beating the shit outta him would release so much fucking anger that i have bottled up inside right now... it's just waiting to come out, and pretty soon it will. Bobby Damon got outta lock up today, he spent a month in juvi, and yea, he's feeling pretty shitty right now for something he didn't fucking do, but because of his past, nobody will believe him or help him out in life... so im gonna try once again... cuz i know how it feels when people give up on me, and he don't need to feel that way right now. today we went to hopewell park and i met up w/ joe and a few other kids and we played hockey in the rain, and then we decided to grab some baseball shit and play a game, but it never got finished, meh, oh well.
Tomorrow (Friday)I think I'm gonna go chill somewhere by myself, i was gonna go to CB's but idk... i was gonna go with steve, jessi and kristie, but idk, jessi's feeling guilty about something, i guess, it's something she won't tell me, and i think i have a feeling on what it is, but i'm set with guessing for now. so idk... i might just become a mallrat again and start going to the mall fridays, saturdays and sundays... seeing that theres nothing else to do... idk wat roman and steph will be up to, i guess steve and jessi will be chillin tomorrow, more than likely w/ kristie, lisa will prob b with curley, aida's in florda, bobby will be at the mall all weekend, idk wat jay is up to... so yea... i've got a pretty boring weekend, i might go chill up at my grandmothers if worse comes to worse...
me and courtney broke up last weekend, it sucks, but idk... life sucks in general. i dont know if i'm gonna take her back or not. to be honest, it doesn't look like i am... at the moment, i'm getting sick of having a long-term relationship, something so strong that seems like marriage, and living with my girlfriend, i'm really starting to hate it... i think i'm just gonna stay single or a while... and more then likely start back with shit during or after the summer. i love courtney, don't get me wrong or anything, but it's just that i can't take it anymore, and i'm getting sick and tired of livin a life that everyone else wants me to live, and i wanna live on my own, without a second part of me, and having somebody to worry about me every second, and someone to know where i am at every moment and shit... idk, i'll think about things a little bit more before i make any final decisions...
well people i'm out for now, i'll update, probably in another week or so.. take it easy and hit me up sumtime!
Peace!!
~~ Josh ~~
~~ Slipknot "Gently"
from their album:: "Iowa"
"Gently, my mind escapes into the relaxing
world of pleasure, a pleasure that'll take
my mind off the reality of my life,
my past life... life as I know it now.
And whatever may come, it slowly
disappears to somewhere in the back
of my mind. It will remain there,
until I wish to retrieve it.
Yes, I will stay here for a while,
for I need the break. A break from the
pressures of life, and everything
that lays in the palm of life's hands.
This mode is incredible. It's out of
this world. Too bad I must always leave it...
... but that's life.
so yea, if you understand the lyrics, you'll understand that my past life has sucked and i love to spend time in my own little world to escape reality for a bit. some people never understand why i do that, or never know when i'm doing that... but it is something i love to do, because the feeling is a drifting feeling.
School has actually been ok since vacation. i haven't had too much work besides the essay, but otherwise i really can't complain much. the only person in school thats been pissing me off is that faggot wigger bitch Furby, he loves to talk shit to me when he's in front of his friends, but when he's alone he runs like a fucking pussy ass bitch... i can't wait until i see him alone and i beat the shit outta him, and i wouldn't care if i got arrested over it, cuz me beating the shit outta him would release so much fucking anger that i have bottled up inside right now... it's just waiting to come out, and pretty soon it will. Bobby Damon got outta lock up today, he spent a month in juvi, and yea, he's feeling pretty shitty right now for something he didn't fucking do, but because of his past, nobody will believe him or help him out in life... so im gonna try once again... cuz i know how it feels when people give up on me, and he don't need to feel that way right now. today we went to hopewell park and i met up w/ joe and a few other kids and we played hockey in the rain, and then we decided to grab some baseball shit and play a game, but it never got finished, meh, oh well.
Tomorrow (Friday)I think I'm gonna go chill somewhere by myself, i was gonna go to CB's but idk... i was gonna go with steve, jessi and kristie, but idk, jessi's feeling guilty about something, i guess, it's something she won't tell me, and i think i have a feeling on what it is, but i'm set with guessing for now. so idk... i might just become a mallrat again and start going to the mall fridays, saturdays and sundays... seeing that theres nothing else to do... idk wat roman and steph will be up to, i guess steve and jessi will be chillin tomorrow, more than likely w/ kristie, lisa will prob b with curley, aida's in florda, bobby will be at the mall all weekend, idk wat jay is up to... so yea... i've got a pretty boring weekend, i might go chill up at my grandmothers if worse comes to worse...
me and courtney broke up last weekend, it sucks, but idk... life sucks in general. i dont know if i'm gonna take her back or not. to be honest, it doesn't look like i am... at the moment, i'm getting sick of having a long-term relationship, something so strong that seems like marriage, and living with my girlfriend, i'm really starting to hate it... i think i'm just gonna stay single or a while... and more then likely start back with shit during or after the summer. i love courtney, don't get me wrong or anything, but it's just that i can't take it anymore, and i'm getting sick and tired of livin a life that everyone else wants me to live, and i wanna live on my own, without a second part of me, and having somebody to worry about me every second, and someone to know where i am at every moment and shit... idk, i'll think about things a little bit more before i make any final decisions...
well people i'm out for now, i'll update, probably in another week or so.. take it easy and hit me up sumtime!
Peace!!
~~ Josh ~~