Fic: Yes We Cane
Title: Yes We Cane
Characters: Sue Sylvester/Sarah Palin
Word Count: 585
Rating: PG-13 for spanking
Disclaimer: I don't own Sue Sylvester or Sarah Palin, and if I did that would be weird.
Spoilers/Warnings: No spoilers, but this is total crack.
Summary: Sue Sylvester has a history with a new Sue's Corner fan.
A/N: Originally written for a glee_kink_meme prompt, and then reworked a little to fill a Ridiculously Specific prompt, too.
She shows up, unexpected, at the studio. Sue's the only one left, getting a head start on her segment for the next week, when she hears the familiar clack-clack-clack of heels against the floor.
"Sarah," she says, smiling as she looks up.
"Sue," Sarah Palin replies.
Sue rises to her feet, shuffling her notes on the desk in front of her. "Long time no see," she casually remarks.
"I've been busy," Sarah Palin replies. "Governing Alaska, being the first female candidate for the vice presidency, raising a gaggle of children in the Alaskan outback..."
"That's what they all say," Sue interrupts. Suddenly her gaze is distant, her voice dreamy. "I never heard from you again after that night."
"And I'm sorry," Sarah Palin says as she approaches the desk. "I was weighed down by my ambitions, by my obligations - but I've gone rogue, now, can't you see? I've gone rogue for you, Sue Sylvester!"
With that, she dramatically sweeps clear the top of the desk. She climbs up and kneels on the surface, grasping either side of Sue's track suit desperately. "I happened to catch a segment of your show while on a bus tour promoting my autobiography, and it reminded me of everything we had together."
"All those good times," Sue continues, her hands resting on Sarah Palin's shoulders. "The book-burnings, the wolf-hunting, the candle-making..."
She's interrupted when Sarah Palin plants a kiss on her lips. "I couldn't contain myself any longer," she breathes. "It's about time we made good on the promise we made to each other in Juneau. Remember?"
"You're going to get me onto one of those death panels?"
"No, the other promise," Sarah Palin answers, pulling Sue towards her for another passionate kiss.
"You've always been a feisty one, haven't you?" Sue says. "Like a pit bull with lipstick."
"Please, Sue," Sarah Palin says with a sly wink, "remind me how you feel about corporal punishment in America's public schools." She shifts on the desktop, crouched on her hands and but facing the other way. Her rear end is squarely in Sue's face.
"Perhaps you saw the first ever segment of Sue's Corner," Sue replies, "in which I told western Ohio yes we cane." Her voice is oozing with seduction. She lifts her hand precariously. "I believe all naughty children should be punished." With that, she brings her hand down hard on Sarah Palin's behind, her palm flat for maximum spanking.
"Oh! Oh! Oh!" Sarah Palin calls out with each resounding smack.
"Now get off of my desk," Sue Sylvester tells her. "And smell your armpits." Sarah Palin does as requested, confused. "You smell that? That's the smell of failure."
"But I have a book -" Sarah Palin begins, but Sue raises a hand.
"You failed to win the presidency," she remarks.
"I was running for vice president..."
"Excuses, excuses..."
"And I was also the governor of the largest state in the nation, balancing work and family and life in the public eye..."
"You think that's hard?" Sue interrupts. "Try living with a broken heart after your Republican lover abandons you to live in the wilderness with the Brawny Paper Towel man," she says, her quivering lip betraying her true feelings. "Now that's hard."
Sarah Palin hangs her head in shame. "Wipe that agony off your face," Sue yells at her back as Sarah Palin leaves. Sue Sylvester stands with her hands on her hips, finally satisfied.
"That's how Sue C's it," she says, her voice echoing in the empty studio.
Characters: Sue Sylvester/Sarah Palin
Word Count: 585
Rating: PG-13 for spanking
Disclaimer: I don't own Sue Sylvester or Sarah Palin, and if I did that would be weird.
Spoilers/Warnings: No spoilers, but this is total crack.
Summary: Sue Sylvester has a history with a new Sue's Corner fan.
A/N: Originally written for a glee_kink_meme prompt, and then reworked a little to fill a Ridiculously Specific prompt, too.
She shows up, unexpected, at the studio. Sue's the only one left, getting a head start on her segment for the next week, when she hears the familiar clack-clack-clack of heels against the floor.
"Sarah," she says, smiling as she looks up.
"Sue," Sarah Palin replies.
Sue rises to her feet, shuffling her notes on the desk in front of her. "Long time no see," she casually remarks.
"I've been busy," Sarah Palin replies. "Governing Alaska, being the first female candidate for the vice presidency, raising a gaggle of children in the Alaskan outback..."
"That's what they all say," Sue interrupts. Suddenly her gaze is distant, her voice dreamy. "I never heard from you again after that night."
"And I'm sorry," Sarah Palin says as she approaches the desk. "I was weighed down by my ambitions, by my obligations - but I've gone rogue, now, can't you see? I've gone rogue for you, Sue Sylvester!"
With that, she dramatically sweeps clear the top of the desk. She climbs up and kneels on the surface, grasping either side of Sue's track suit desperately. "I happened to catch a segment of your show while on a bus tour promoting my autobiography, and it reminded me of everything we had together."
"All those good times," Sue continues, her hands resting on Sarah Palin's shoulders. "The book-burnings, the wolf-hunting, the candle-making..."
She's interrupted when Sarah Palin plants a kiss on her lips. "I couldn't contain myself any longer," she breathes. "It's about time we made good on the promise we made to each other in Juneau. Remember?"
"You're going to get me onto one of those death panels?"
"No, the other promise," Sarah Palin answers, pulling Sue towards her for another passionate kiss.
"You've always been a feisty one, haven't you?" Sue says. "Like a pit bull with lipstick."
"Please, Sue," Sarah Palin says with a sly wink, "remind me how you feel about corporal punishment in America's public schools." She shifts on the desktop, crouched on her hands and but facing the other way. Her rear end is squarely in Sue's face.
"Perhaps you saw the first ever segment of Sue's Corner," Sue replies, "in which I told western Ohio yes we cane." Her voice is oozing with seduction. She lifts her hand precariously. "I believe all naughty children should be punished." With that, she brings her hand down hard on Sarah Palin's behind, her palm flat for maximum spanking.
"Oh! Oh! Oh!" Sarah Palin calls out with each resounding smack.
"Now get off of my desk," Sue Sylvester tells her. "And smell your armpits." Sarah Palin does as requested, confused. "You smell that? That's the smell of failure."
"But I have a book -" Sarah Palin begins, but Sue raises a hand.
"You failed to win the presidency," she remarks.
"I was running for vice president..."
"Excuses, excuses..."
"And I was also the governor of the largest state in the nation, balancing work and family and life in the public eye..."
"You think that's hard?" Sue interrupts. "Try living with a broken heart after your Republican lover abandons you to live in the wilderness with the Brawny Paper Towel man," she says, her quivering lip betraying her true feelings. "Now that's hard."
Sarah Palin hangs her head in shame. "Wipe that agony off your face," Sue yells at her back as Sarah Palin leaves. Sue Sylvester stands with her hands on her hips, finally satisfied.
"That's how Sue C's it," she says, her voice echoing in the empty studio.