Jen is a buzzkiller.

[cruelbitch]

In my line of work, I get constantly propositioned not only for sex acts but also for extreme sex acts. With my particularly over-analytical state of mind, this can either be pretty hilarious or highly disturbing. In the back of my mind, I'm silently wondering if these fantasies are borne out of genuine desire or if they're conditionings projected

Comments

[masochrist_zero]

I agree in that pornography poses two main problems: Giving men a false notion of what women want, and giving women a false notion of what's expected of them.

I've seen and had girls off the bat deep throat me, which they clearly learned from watching porn, unless they had a prior boyfriend who expressed a desire for it. Sure it feels phenomenal, but at two key points in the act: When the tongue rubs against the glans of the penis upon entering the mouth, and when the tongue rubs against the glans of the penis upon exiting the mouth. A penis is like a vagina in that there are a lot of parts that all feel good when touched, but if the goal is orgasm you stay at the clit/glans.

Oh and fellatio IS about dominance, but not man over woman. If we're discussing the sexual misconceptions brought about by pornography, we need to address that one. Yes, it's obvious that most normal porn [I say normal as in no bondage, reverse gang bang, etc just consensual straight sex] shows blow jobs as the man using the woman's mouth as a fuck toy. However in reality [barring the retards who indulge in the above behavior willingly], it's the man at the mercy of the woman. I was always completely under your control when you gave me oral sex. Why wouldn't I be? You control my pleasure, where it is, how much or how little you're willing to give, and how quickly or slowly I'll achieve orgasm. I WANT that pleasure, so naturally I'm going to let you do whatever you want to me. Trying to force my cock down a woman's throat is the fastest way to ensure that I will NOT be getting head that day.

Something else that pisses me off is the myth about swallowing cum. The way chicks fight over swallowing a guys seed in porns you'd think he ejaculated a potion of immortality. Yes, it can be very erotic to orgasm in a girls mouth. The mouth work on your cock never stops until you're completely done, and that feels great. Plus the fact that she's swallowing THAT part of you is psychologically thrilling in [in my opinion], an intimate way. It's the porn industry that makes swallowing cum seem like a mark of ownership imbued by the male upon the female, and that instills the mentality in the viewers.

Further to this point, it makes girls think they have to let a guy cum in their mouth in order to give a good blow job. This is entirely false. An orgasm is an orgasm, where it goes is up to the "suck-ee". If you honestly want to swallow because you like the taste, the concept or you just want to avoid a mess, by all means go for it, I'm sure he won't stop you. But if you're swallowing because you feel like you'll be letting him down if you don't, you need to establish some basic communication with your man. Assuming he's a normal guy, he jerks off and he'll be used to cleaning up after himself anyway. If he insists that you swallow his cum, hold it in your mouth and snowball it back to him. If he doesn't like the taste or the thought of swallowing his own bodily fluids, then he has absolutely no right forcing that opinion on his partner.

I agree with everything else you said, as usual. Unfortunately people will probably read it and agree, then perpetuate it regardless.

[cruelbitch]

Regarding fellatio about women's dominion, I'm not so sure I agree. Teasing, yes, but a thorough blowjob requires repetitive, rhythmic suction once you've gotten them past the point of susceptibility to cockteasing. A few minutes of this and you're drooling, forcing breath through your nose and your jaw cramps and goes numb. Talk about an empowering experiance.

I've overheard conversations at work with married mothers who say things like "The worst is when he wants to pull out and come all over your face. It's so gross." I'm not sure who's fault it is that they continue to recieve this: Hers for not speaking up, or his for being indifferent to her protests (callous lust) or deriving pleasure from her protests (malevolent lust).

"If he insists that you swallow his cum, hold it in your mouth and snowball it back to him. If he doesn't like the taste or the thought of swallowing his own bodily fluids, then he has absolutely no right forcing that opinion on his partner." This is a pretty valid point.

"Unfortunately people will probably read it and agree, then perpetuate it regardless." So is this. Either that or they'll shake their head and disagree about what a buzzkiller I am, and how they definately LOVE it when Brad titfucks their augmented double d's, while they die a little on the inside as they get speared in the chin with a cockhead.

[masochrist_zero]

"..requires repetitive, rhythmic suction once you've gotten them past the point of susceptibility to cockteasing. A few minutes of this and you're drooling, forcing breath through your nose and your jaw cramps and goes numb."

The exact statements could be said for cunnilingus, but there was never a debate on whether or not the man was being mistreated by subjecting himself to said pain for the woman's pleasure.

Which leads me to question whether the act of oral sex in and of itself is completely irrelevant, regardless of which set of genitals it's performed on, and the entire concept of being demeaned while giving fellatio is nothing more than a socially conditioned thought process.

[cruelbitch]

I'm not really surprised to hear this argument from someone who has a blowjob fetish, but let's pretend I don't know this. Of course it's an issue regardless of the gender. My point is that if anything becomes painful or uncomfortable for the giver for the sole benefit of the reciever then in my opinion it's not worth doing. I have no issues with teasing; there is a power dynamic that can be fun without being threatening, because the recipient of the teasing not being harmed (obviously). But the thorough format of suction is only pleasurable before a certain point. Also dick vs. vag proposes a few subliminal theories in my head... considering the abuse many females endure during most types of sexual activity, a blowjob is just tacked onto the list, whereas cunnilingus is basically the only area where a man will have to exercise his endurance without having anything else expected of him.

Also, you're negating the differences between genitalia. A vagina is more concave, with folds and crevices therefore a multitude of variation can be exercised to produce pleasure. There is kissing, licking, nibbling, fondling and the focal point of all this is gentleness. The clitoris is a miniscule nub that requires a varying degree of stimulation - suction being amoung one of them - although its size is not even comparable to that of a penis. However, the cock is a pretty simple instrument, and sure you can lick along it's length, but the sole pleasure resides in taking the cumbersome girth inside your mouth and bobbing back and forth to stimulate under the tip. Even the shape of it, and the actually purpose of its design, is to suggest impalement; it belongs thrust inside of something, it needs a sheath for its sword. There's more complexity to the female orgasm, I'm sorry to say.